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I Was Brave Enough To Watch The Bachelor

Is The Franchise Really Back?

Okay let’s just start off by saying that I do unironically enjoy Love Island.I love the chaos, the characters, and shameless self-promotion. Every season, two people on average fall in love while the rest compete for screen time to land brand deals. Isn’t all drama better served in a British accent?

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Fine, I’ll admit it! I am exhausted from watching heavy plots about murder mysteries and docudramas detailing scandals. I've had enough of watching all the bad in the world. And after a long day of work I'm in no mood to follow a plot-heavy show.

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TV

Luke P. Resorts to Gaslighting Through Christianity

In their blowout last night, he fell back on the same pattern: confront, manipulate to gain power (occasionally lying), and then backtrack to save face.

We've all had enough of Luke Parker.

ABC

It's a general truth that a majority of the Bachelor Franchise's contestants are Christian.

There have been virgin contestants, a born-again virgin Bachelor, and then a straight-up virgin Bachelor. Yet, over the past two decades, the show has refrained from airing discussions of touchy topics like religion or sex. Participants on the show have disclosed that many deep conversations regarding such matters go unaired.

Then, last season, one contestant, Caelynn Miller-Keyes, disclosed her sexual assault to the Bachelor, Colton Underwood. The heart-stopping moment became a revelatory scene in reality television. Viewers everywhere could hear, relate, and connect to the moving story. Powerful moments like those are more common now that participants are breaking away from the show's traditional boundaries, storylines, and rules. In turn, production has begun to re-shape the show; while the series has become more sex positive, religion has remained a taboo subject—until last night.

Throughout this season, Bachelor Nation has witnessed an emotional abuser remain on their TVs for far too long—even by the standards of reality TV, it's been alarming. Luke P.'s concerning behavior, from aggression to excessive lying, has prompted viewers to question, "What in the hell are we not seeing?" Hannah Brown and Luke P. have had a connection that viewers cannot not wrap their heads around, but it turns out that viewers were missing half the story. While Luke P. has stirred the pot by repeatedly disrespecting Hannah and his fellow contestants, viewers have questioned if an inexplicable spiritual connection has been drawing the two together.

Finally, the other half of the story was unveiled during Fantasy Suite week. After the two made-out during their day touring Santorini, Luke P. began their dinner by gaslighting Hannah:

"I am very confident that we're on the same page with our morals, and I just want to hear it from your mouth. I've heard people proclaim their faith, but yet they've said things like, 'I'm excited for Fantasy Suites. I want to explore this relationship on a sexually intimate level, and that's what I'm looking forward to.' And to me, that's like whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa excuse me? What? There's something I'm missing here. Like I don't believe that's something you should be doing, and I just want to make sure that you're not going to be sexually intimate with the other relationships here. Like, I totally have all the trust in the world for you, but at the same time I just want to make sure we're on the same page. Like, if you told me you're going to have sex or you had sex with one or multiple of these guys, I would be wanting to go home 100 percent."

Hannah Sends Luke P Home After Fantasy Suite Warning! | The Bachelorette USwww.youtube.com

If delivered differently and with more tact, his concerns could've been reasonable. Instead, he began by aligning the other contestants against him and weaponizing his connection with Hannah to make assumptions about how she should act. Then, he backtracked by asserting that he had faith in her and finally threatened their relationship if she didn't live up to his standards. The loaded speech demonstrates his continued pattern of emotional manipulation. When Hannah disagreed with what he said, he continued to backtrack by claiming that he would work with her through anything, even a "slip-up." Similarly, earlier in the season, he informed Hannah that he would stick by her even if she made a "boneheaded mistake."

Time and time again, Luke P. has utilized gaslighting as a way to maintain control in his relationship with Hannah. Whenever he's felt confident in their relationship, he's directly addressed his concerns with Hannah, but when he's felt their relationship was in jeopardy, he's used manipulation tactics to assert what he wants out of the relationship. However, whenever he's "slipped up," the responsibility hasn't fallen on him because he's protested that he was just "misunderstood"—after lying straight to Hannah's face.

Overall, every time Luke P. has been in the wrong, he's asserted his needs, manipulated the truth, and then backtracked whenever Hannah responded poorly. In their blowout last night, he fell back on the same pattern: confront, manipulate to gain power (occasionally lying), and then backtrack to save face.

Whatever good Hannah saw in Luke P. prior to Fantasy Suite week has been washed away. When Luke P. tried to wield religion against Hannah to shame her, she called him out on it. The Bachelorette proved that she had her Biblical receipts, retorting, "You know the story in the Bible when the woman was called out for adultery, and she was stoned in the village, and Jesus said, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. You're holding your stone up at me and asking me what I've done."

Unfortunately, gaslighting in the Christian community isn't anything new. Too many self-righteous believers still condemn, shame, and utilize their beliefs to shame sinners and preach a narrow way of life. Hannah aptly addressed Luke P.'s hypocrisy by informing him, "Sex might be a sin out of marriage, but pride is a sin too." She continued, "It's like you're holding other people to a standard that you don't even live by."

Faith is meant to spread love and light. Like Hannah said, "I know that I have God in my heart, so I know that everything I do and who I am is light. I am light. Do I make mistakes? I'm not Jesus." Her commentary shed light on the stark contrast between more progressive, inclusive Christians who have embraced the modern world and others who stick to their outdated, hypocritical agendas (like those who are pro-life but don't care about keeping children in cages).

For the formerly apolitical show to air their conversation is a sign that the genre of "reality" TV is still expanding its social consciousness; in particular, it displays that the Bachelor Franchise has solid potential (even after 17 years) to spark new conversations and highlight important narratives. Unfortunately, as portrayed in the previews for next week, the producers seem to allow Luke P. to come back, undoubtedly to exasperate Hannah and continue the toxic drama that is Luke P.'s existence.

ABC's production seems to take a positive step forward by airing their candid conversation, but they still kept around an emotional abuser and then brought him back to let him try to manipulate his way back into Hannah's heart. At least Hannah Brown finally gained clarity and found her way out of a controlling relationship (for now). Hopefully, like other leads who have been forced to endure harmful, disruptive, racist, and misogynistic contestants, Hannah can come out on top, with continued love and respect for herself and her relationship with God.

TV

The Sexist Double Standard on "The Bachelorette"

On The Bachelorette, it's a woman who bears the burden of other people's opinions about her choices and who's saddled with the repercussions. Why?

Before Nick Viall became a Bachelor Nation staple, he was the guy who confronted his ex, Bachelorette Andi Dorfman, on national television.

"Knowing how in love with you I was, if you weren't in love with me, I'm just not sure why you made love with me," he said accusingly. Dorfman retorted that was "below the belt" and should "be kept private."

What Nick Viall divulged might have been met with pity if a woman had expressed it—because men take advantage of women all the time. But on The Bachelor, no woman has taken issue with the leading man being intimate with another woman. In contrast, time and time again, the men on The Bachelorette become possessive and force the female contestant to defend her actions, specifically her sexual decisions. It's clear that the Bachelor can have sex with his female suitors whenever he pleases and receive no backlash from the contestants or from Bachelor Nation.

Bachelorette Finale - Nick Confronts Andi About Sex Suitewww.youtube.com

Meanwhile, Dorfman received a lot of flack for hurting Nick's feelings. Similarly, the following bachelorette, Kaitlyn Bristowe, also received backlash for having sex with Nick Viall before the "fantasy suites." It's an unspoken rule that the fantasy suites are where the final four contestants are free to do whatever they want during their first time away from the cameras. The production team typically stocks the suite with sweets, alcohol, and condoms for each pair's indulgence.

For Nick to have sex with Bristowe before the "fantasy suite" format seemed hypocritical. Here we had a man who implied that Dorfman was cruel to have sex with him because she did not end up committing to him. A year later, Nick even defended Kaitlyn's choice to have sex with him on the show, tweeting, "Sex is not shameful. Whether we want to admit it or not, sex is an important part of many serious and meaningful relationships." While Nick has since apologized, it's still important to acknowledge that he shamed Dorfman for her sexual expression in front of millions. Yet, it was Bristowe and Dorfman who received the brunt of the backlash, with people across the nation slut-shaming them, while Nick got away scot-free.

Last night, yet another Bachelorette had to address a man's issue with her sexual actions. While on her first one-on-one date in Latvia, Hannah and Garrett bungee jumped naked (as is Latvian tradition). The date was riveting, vulnerable, and fun. It was an experience for the couple and the viewers.

When Garrett came back from his date, he giddily recounted it to the other men, but resident villain Luke P. did not receive the news of the naked bungee jumping kindly. He told the camera that he didn't believe Hannah would do that, and if she did, it'd be a slap in the face to him.

On their group date, Hannah referred to her date with Garrett and confirmed what Garrett said. Reality finally hit Luke P., and he was pissed. During the evening portion of the date, he took Hannah aside to "clarify" what happened on her one-on-one with Garrett and express how he felt about it. He began by referring to her body as "a temple," then cited her nude bungee jumping as "a slap in the face"; he concluded by divulging that he's no longer "confident" that he wants her to meet his family now. When Hannah reacted poorly to this, he put his foot farther in his mouth by trying to win her back, claiming that he'll always stick by her whenever she makes "boneheaded mistakes."

Still mulling over the alarming conversation with Luke, Hannah decided to sit down with him on the day of the cocktail party. She addressed her concerns, which included the language he used, calling her nude bungee jumping a "boneheaded mistake" and using his family against her. But, all that aside, Hannah informed Luke P. that at this point, he shouldn't even be concerned with what goes on in her other relationships because, "You're not my husband. You don't own my body. You don't own me. It's my body." Luke P. claimed that she completely misunderstood him. He told her that she might not be remembering everything correctly and that she was twisting his language. Luke P. backtracking in such a manipulative and outright dishonest fashion furthers the argument that he's not only a pathological liar, but downright emotionally abusive.

Their interaction seems to be only the beginning of what's to come. The Bachelorette has teased Hannah's iconic line, "I have had sex and Jesus still loves me!" for weeks now and recently revealed Luke P. is on the receiving end of the sentiment. It's obvious that the narrative around sex and religion will come to a head this season, which will hopefully put The Bachelor franchise's slut-shaming to bed. As much as the franchise supposedly tries to uplift their "independent" women, the Bachelorette constantly has to reassure the men, reassert her strength, and defend her actions: a phenomenon that will most likely persist, since it appears that many men still can't understand that a woman's body belongs only to her.

Recently, host Chris Harrison suggested that The Bachelor franchise has showcased the changing realities of dating. Alas, that's true. As much as The Bachelor franchise wants to keep up with the times, The Bachelorette still plays into damaging stereotypes about relationships, gender roles, and how some men on The Bachelorette react poorly to not controlling the female lead. Luke P. isn't the first contestant, nor will he be the last, to impose his expectations of what a woman should or should not do with her body. As such, The Bachelorette reinforces the double standard that a woman can't express the same bodily autonomy and decision-making as a man.

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TV

‘The Bachelorette’ Episode 4 Recap: The Beast Jumped Out.

Could Luke P. be the Beast to Hannah's Belle? We hope not.

At this point, no one can truly predict what's to come this season, but Luke P, resident psycho of the season, really could slither his way into Hannah's heart. Since Courtney Robertson, no villain has been so close to winning the affections of the lead.

Leaving the mansion for Newport, Rhode Island our expectations were low. Somehow, for two weeks straight, the men brought it. They've been the voice of reason, emoting exactly what Bachelor nation feels.

One-on-One: Jed is really a Jeb

Fake news floated throughout Jed's one-on-one date: Hannah filled the void of conversation with made-up facts about Boston, they ate pints of Halo Top in fifty-degree weather, and Jed claimed the Celtic's Terry Rozier and Jaylen Brown are two of the best players in the NBA.

All that aside, Hannah's first verbal fumble of the season made audiences cringe, as she tried five times to remember the quotation, "taxation without representation," foreshadowing the crap to come.

Their Boston date should've been perfect: they strolled through the city, drank at Cheers!, and played basketball at TD Garden with two pros. Yet, the date felt wasted.

Most likely, Hannah could've had just as much fun with any other guy. They kissed, and then kissed some more when Jed made a hook shot. Really, Jaylen Brown stole the show.

The two Browns hit it off, with the 22-year-old offering sound advice that Hannah should choose, "somebody who's there for the rough times and the good times … somebody's who's going to accept you for your flaws and your beauty."

Cut-to the evening, where Jed admitted to Hannah he actually came on the show because he knew it was a huge platform for exposure and a great opportunity for his career. Hannah came packing with one hard-hitting question, asking, "How can you go from this is an opportunity to marriage?"

He responded, "it's beyond a show at this point."

She glowed, hearing exactly what any woman would want to hear. Dropping the issue a little too quickly, Jed received a red rose but the audience saw a red flag.

Group Date: Meat-Fest

The group dates this season have been physically demanding, featuring injuries and hard falls. Last night was no different: the men met at Fort Adams to suit up and play rugby.

What Hannah considers sexy is a man in his purest, masculine form. "Blood, sweat, and tears!" she cheered, repeatedly, in a concerning manner. She also repeatedly claimed she wanted no one to get "hurt," but really, the harder the hitting, the better and hotter for Hannah.

The convincing neanderthal, Luke P., got a little too into the game, claiming he "would do anything for Hannah." Kevin, unfortunately, dislocated his shoulder, which Hannah only kind of cared about because she only kind of cares about Kevin.

The Beast really jumped out, roaring with male energy that fueled Luke P.'s inner caveman fire. The now infamous smack-down occurred when Luke P. lifted Luke S. to flip him, throwing him to the ground and, reportedly, kneeing him in the face. Luke S., who I shall call Mousey Luke because he looks like a mouse in a suit, was pissed off, rightfully so. Luke tried to apologize, but Mousey Luke would not have it.

Hannah wasn't having it either. She called Luke out on his frustrating ways, to which he responded by lying and turning the attention towards Mousey Luke, accusing him of only being on the show to promote his tequila business. Diverting from the real problem, the rumor soon took root in Hannah's mind.

The issue gave Hannah a good reason to side with Luke since she already doesn't really like Mousey Luke. When questioned about the matter, Mousey Luke didn't respond well, irritated again by the lies and psychopathy Luke disguises as evidence.

The other men didn't take kindly to this either, especially when Luke tried to clarify what happened. In defense, Luke declared he didn't know what happened because it was all a blur. He then articulated exactly what he believed occurred, demonstrating the threat Luke poses to the group and everyone's safety. Everyone was distressed by Luke's presence, many were concerned, while others were just fed up he devoured their time with Hannah.

Instead of feeding into the drama, Garrett and Peter tried to take Hannah's mind off it by focusing on their individual relationships. The rest was noise, especially as Hannah and Peter made out, heavily, sensually on a couch.

Hannah evidently appreciated this, rewarding Garrett with the evening's rose, to the dismay of adorable Pilot Pete.

One-on-One: A Turning Point

Hannah Brown's facade was tired. She was meant to be on a date with Tyler C, but her mind was consumed by Luke.

Defying the show's format, Hannah admitted her relationship with Luke was the strongest thus far which made her question her own judgment.

Unable to plaster on her winning Alabama smile, she was up-front with Tyler C; she didn't want to be there. Instead of folding to her will, he stepped up, demonstrating exactly what Jaylen Brown told her to look for in a man, someone willing to be there for her highs and lows.

Tyler C. reassured her, saying, "I'll take whatever I can get, I want you in your highs and lows. I want to be the man on your side at the end of this and I think I can show you that today."

With another manly date in store, the two excitedly fished together. A real connection was visible on screen as he continued to cheer her up. The reality of life and the ability to be there for one another transcended the situation. There, unlike with Jed, their date went beyond the show. The way they joked with each other, being punny and funny, proved their real-life compatibility.

In the evening, Hannah posed a question to Tyler C., "Why are you really on the show?" Unexpectedly, his "big time griller, big time chiller" persona was set aside. He divulged his father almost died two months before the show, spending 25 days in the hospital with 10 in a coma. Tyler C. was reluctant to go on the show, but his father reassured him while watching The Bachelor together that Hannah's his girl.

He didn't believe it until he got out of the limo. Tyler C. recounted that for the first time in his life, he clutched his heart when he saw Hannah. Elated, she remembered that moment and through the TV, anyone could see the sparks fly. To viewers, the sky cleared and the stars aligned for them to meet.

Hannah admitted she was wary of him, believing he was a player. He smoothly retorted, "I'm here for Hannah, not the bachelorette." Tyler C. was there for the little jitters she gave him, knowing, "the world could be ours." Hannah gave Tyler C. his rightful rose, which should've been the end to a perfect date.

Instead, they celebrated with a private concert. Jake Owen had the live audience cheering and the couple kissing, giddy.

The Cocktail Party: Send The Lukes Home, Pls

The evening began with a dragged out, pointed toast about love and honesty. Thankfully, Pilot Pete swooped in to begin the evening on a soothing note. He wanted to "keep the momentum going" by sweetly asking her to be his girlfriend. The innocent, but cheeky moment was refreshing, especially when Hannah exclaimed, "Peter's my boyfriend!"

While the momentum did build, it was unfortunate because of the Luke drama. The rest of the evening could've been edited down to a two-on-one and no one would have noticed.

Mike, being the no-bs man of the season, informed Luke he's "the cause of her being unhappiest right now."

"Actually… no," Luke excused himself, failing to be accountable in the pettiest of ways.

The word psychopath was hurled at Luke, finally, to his face. Someone on production gave Luke their phone because, in the meme-able confessional, Luke read the definition of a psychopath, shoving the phone towards the camera to prove his point.

Mousey Luke attempted to redeem himself with Hannah to no avail. He tried another tactic, asking Luke to admit to Hannah he was incorrect about Mousey Luke's intentions. The male ensemble resoundingly agreed, especially Garrett who attempted to get through to Luke.

Being the psycho he must be, Luke began the conversation with, "I know this has been an emotional week… for the BOTH of us."

The awful start got worse when he bitched to Hannah that Mousey Luke told him to lie to her and say he's here for the right reasons.

Hannah obviously did not take that lightly and began the he-said-he-said merry-go-round.

When Mousey Luke discovered Luke's bullshit, he was astounded. When all was finally revealed to the group, every reaction was phenomenal. Dylan added the cherry on top, serving as the national mouthpiece, "I've never disliked someone more in my entire life."

The two Lukes stared at each other and the show cut-out to NEXT WEEK ON THE BACHELORETTE…

Safe to say the whole nation gasped.

TV

7 Films and TV Shows to Celebrate Pride Month

Queer representation means more than just a queer character plopped in a plot line.

Pride

Photo by Margaux Bellott on Unsplash

Pride month is here and Drag Race is over, and unfortunately, it's hard to find many other shows for queer people by queer people. Supporting and celebrating pride month isn't just buying a rainbow shirt from Target; it's buying directly from queer artists and giving back to the culture. With representation more important than ever, these TV shows and films place queer characters right in the center where they belong. Here are some to look out for and catch up on.

Now Apocalypse(Starz)

Gregg Araki, known for his great contributions to the New Queer Cinema Movement, is at it again with this bizarre new show. Avan Jogia (of Victorious and Twisted fame) stars as Ulysses, a gay man who has disturbing, premonitory dreams that the world is ending. Ulysses's romantic and platonic relationships are explored with consideration for sexuality and fame in Los Angeles. Now Apocalypse takes LGBTQIA representation to the absurd and it couldn't be more fun. All episodes are now available for streaming on Starz.

Pose (FX)

Ryan Murphy's latest phenomenon is back for its second season on June 10th. The show centers on POC queer, cis and trans men and women as they navigate different NYC scenes and find purpose through the African American and Latinx ball culture. The show also investigates each character's place in society during the AIDs crisis, reclaiming the narrative and the hysteria of the era. If you're not caught up yet, the FX show is now on Netflix.

Rocketman

Executive produced by Elton John himself, Rocketman was released last weekend to a surprisingly solid first weekend. Bohemian Rhapsody's fill-in director, Dexter Fletcher, captures the life of a queer icon. Besides Rocketman being the first major Hollywood studio production to show a gay sex scene, the film does what Bohemian Rhapsody wanted to do but Queen would not allow: put a global icon's sexuality on display, explore the creative depths of a genius, and feature a lead actor that actually sings. Sing along and enjoy the breadth of great performances and direction.

Queer Eye(Netflix)

Ok, this is an obvious one, but season 3 only premiered in March! If you haven't already watched the fantastic makeovers and heart-warming stories that have come out of the reboot, you're missing out. Celebrate love and life by embracing those who are transformed by the Fab Five. While you're at it, preorder Tan France's book, Naturally Tan: A Memoir

Euphoria(HBO)

Not many know what this show is actually about, but the trailer seems to center on the complicated lives of youth today. Sexual and gender identities are at the forefront of conversation today, especially from adolescents aware of their pertinence in a way previous generations were not. LGBTQ activist and trans woman, Hunter Shafer, will star as a trans girl who befriends Zendaya's character and their relationship potentially becomes something more. Down the rabbit hole viewers will go! Premiering on June 16th, Euphoria gives everyone a reason to keep their HBO subscription.

Booksmart

White feminism aside, Booksmart is an important film because of its lesbian representation. Beanie Feldstein, break-out star of Lady Bird, explained how important her co-star's character is to her and society, "For me in my life, it is a part of who I am but it is not at all my defining feature. It doesn't mean I don't love my girlfriend, it's just part of who I am. And [the character]'s the same way. To see that in Amy and how beautifully Kaitlyn plays her and how beautifully Katie [Silberman, screenwriter] and Olivia [Wilde, director] crafted her, it's gonna change a lot of people's lives." Booksmart is still in theaters nationwide.

One Day at A Time (Netflix, for now)

The 70s sitcom reboot came with reevaluations. The showrunners, Kellet and Royce, decided to change the two daughters to a daughter and son. One of the main characters, the daughter Elena, did not start off as a gay character. It wasn't until Royce's real-life daughter came out that he realized he needed to tell this story. His writer's room invested their own experiences to shape a character and an on-going storyline that provided insight into a coming-out story and its realities in a fresh, familial context. It's done beautifully and truthfully. While Netflix has canceled the show, the creators are fighting to revive it on another platform or channel. #SaveODAT!