Looking for something twerk-free and tearful? Be among the first 301+ to watch Miley Cyrus' "Wrecking Ball" music video in which she cries...

 

 

...rides a wrecking ball...

 

Rides a Wrecking Ball

 

...and rides a wrecking ball naked.

 

Miley Naked Ball

 

So, okay, it's not completely anti-Miley, but at least she keeps her tongue to herself. Sorta.

 

Miley Make Out Hammer