great granny bedazzle vagina
It’s yet another of those bizarre news stories you really WANT to be true, but just don’t think it’s possible.
Then again, it happened in Las Vegas…. so you never know.
According to Now8News, a Las Vegas dwelling great-granny was allegedly hospitalized after bedazzling her vagina.
This is how it all (allegedly) went down (so to speak):
That’s where 92-year-old Mildred Vandorsom met the guy who got her all fired up. Fired up enough to clear the cobwebs out of her crusty crevice and take a Bedazzler to it. It sounded like a good idea at the time.
According to family members, Vandorsum had signed up for a membership on the trusted dating site, and that’s where she happened upon a 36-year-old male who triggered the rapid downward spiral.
He couldn’t resist her profile picture (see above) and asked the great-grandmother of 22 out for a date.
The family tried to intervene—there’s a 56- year age difference, after all—Popdust did the math! However, Millie was undeterred and “ready for an adventure.”
It was time to begin“tricking out” her vagina with her granddaughter’s Bedazzle kit.
The works—glitter, or shall we say clit—er, beading, and bling, but it wasn’t long before Vandorsum began complaining of shortness of breath, nausea and dizziness.
Her daughter, Ruth, rushed her to the hospital and explained to the ER doctor that her mom had spent the evening with a much younger man the night before and maybe it was a little more than she could take.
“Oh I don’t think it was the date itself sweetie,” Vandorsum interjected. “I think it might have been that damn Bedazzle kit I stole from Lizzie’s room before my date on Friday.
“I decided to bling out my goodies, you know just like those rap stars do to their teeth. And I did just that. And boy was he surprised.
“I laid on my side and lifted my leg in the air and said ‘Hey Yum Yum do you like my new smile, it’s VaJazzled!’
“I was blinged from front to back. He said it looked more like a frown. But that didn’t stop him!”
We sooo want this to be true!
Las Vegas….. 92-year-old great-great grandmas, bling, sex… it’s got it all going on!
Sadly however, (obviously) not true.
Now8News has a history of hoax stories, that we just wish were real.
But hey, as we always say—NEVER let the truth get in the way of a good story.