Well, hope you all ate your fill over the Thanksgiving holiday, because after this week’s episode of American Horror Story: Freak Show you may not have much of an appetite.
All the freaks are searching the woods for Ma Petite The dog finds her tattered clothes and they think an animal snatched her. Elsa is beside herself with grief, but Ethel doesn’t buy it. She drunkenly accuses Elsa of killing Ma Petite but Elsa adamantly denies it. “She was my most precious one,” she cries.
At one point things get so heated that Ethel shoots Elsa in the leg, expecting her to fall to the ground in agony. Think again Ethel…that gam is all wood. How did she not know that?!
The bullet hole in the leg prompts Elsa to tell Ethel the story of how she got her prosthetics and how she’s a freak just like the rest of them. How could she possibly harm one of her own? But still, Ethel calls bullshit and decides she’s going to kill Elsa then kill herself. Elsa offers one last schnapps for the road, but when she goes to pour the shot she grabs one of her knives and hurls it straight into Ethel’s eye. Lights out.
Elsa, with the help of Stanley, stages a car crash that makes Ethel’s death look like a suicide. Everyone pretty much believes it because they knew Ethel was sick anyway. Elsa puts on the performance of her life pretending to grieve for Ethel, and Jimmy finds himself comforting his mom’s murderer. But, c’mon. It was pretty much self defense, right?!
Apparently Elsa’s done grieving because she heads to a fat farm in Miami to recruit a new act. Enter Barbara, a very obese upper East Side debutant. She takes her back to the camp and sits her in front of a smorgasbord of food to fatten her up even more. Her stage name? Ima Wiggles.
Gloria’s massive anxiety over Dandy’s behavior forces her to therapy to talk about Dandy’s problematic history. To top it all off, Regina, Dora the maid’s daughter, shows up at the Motts’ home asking entirely too many questions about her missing mother’s whereabouts . Side note: Gabourey Sidibe is the queen of no-bullshit characters.
Gloria persuades Dandy to go to the therapist by telling him that the therapist wants to test his genius IQ. After some hilariously grotesque reactions to the inkblot test, Dandy begins telling the story of a tribe in Papua New Guinea who believes that a person can take someone’s power by eating their flesh. Great, two guesses where this is going. Dandy goes home and calls bullshit on the fake IQ testing, insisting that the only way he’s go back to the doctor is if she kills Regina. Dandy then tells her that the reason he’s the way he is is because Gloria married and “bred” with her second cousin who happened to be a pedophile. Gloria tries to comfort Dandy, but he holds a gun to his head, crying “It’s time for the madness to end.”
“I can’t go on if you kill yourself,” Gloria pleads.
“Okay.” BANG, BULLET TO HER FOREHEAD!
In other news, Desiree and the other women help Penny get revenge on her psycho father. They tar and feather him before they intend to cut his dick off, shoot him in the head, then throw him in the river for the gator to eat! Maggie barges in, talks them off the ledge and they decide to let him live. Damn, that would’ve been a great murder scene.
What did you think of this week’s American Horror Story? Sound off in the comments below!