Angelina Jolie Syrian refugee hunger strike and Tom Cruise's pooh battle it out for this week's fake story award
This week's Fake Story Award involves a twofer:
In the red corner we have:
The angelina jolie syrian refugee hunger strike
And in the blue corner we have:
Shit-storing tom cruise
Read up on both, then decide the most worthy Fake Story Award recipient by voting in the Popdust poll below!
Here we go:
The Angelina Jolie Syrian refugee hunger strike
OK, so first:
It’s fairly apparent from just looking at Jolie throughout the years, that she’s been on some kind of personally motivated hunger strike since her late teens.
If it’s a “secret” hunger strike, how on earth is that supposed to draw attention to anything?!!
The Enquirer also has a great quote from their angelina jolie syrian refugee hunger strike insider:
Angie’s trying to save the world, but she can’t seem to save herself.
She told us, ‘If they can’t eat, I can’t eat.'
The only thing her frightening weight loss is calling attention to is her health, not the unfortunate people she’s trying to help.
Brad’s trying desperately to make Angie understand the dire straits she’s in.
Well, Jolie’s frightening weight loss is certainly getting the National Enquirer’s attention a lot recently.
They’ve run two stories about it in the past couple of weeks alone.
In the latter they claim:
Angelina Jolie is a walking skeleton who could drop dead at any moment!
As the wispy star’s weight plummets to a tear-inducing all-time low of 79 pounds, The National ENQUIRER can reveal that her friends fear she’s losing a brave battle — and is in danger of suffering severe organ failure and possibly death!
Her heartbroken husband Brad Pitt is anxiously trying to get Angie, 40, to eat more and work less, but his desperate pleas have fallen on deaf ears!
Well, on a plus note, at least she has that “shroud” she wrapped herself up in when she went out to dinner.
That will definitely come in handy for when she finally loses her “brave battle.”
Shit-storing Tom Cruise:
Apparently, Cruise engages in a bizarre anti-aging treatment that involves him having his stool samples analyzed by doctors.
He allegedly keeps his shit in tupperware containers that he stores in his winnebago.
They quote a tom cruise and his pooh insider:
An assistant collects the samples for testing.
They can only be picked up after he’s left the Winnebago.
So, which one wins?
The angelina jolie syrian refugee hunger strike or shit-storing tom cruise?
You decide—vote in our poll now!
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The Angelina Jolie Syrian refugee hunger strike or shit-storing Tom Cruise—vote now!