Christina Aguilera's crummy couple of months culminated early Tuesday with an arrest in Los Angeles, and the aftermath has spilled out over the past 36 hours: drunk-driving boyfriend Matt Rutler just picked his car up from the impound; the police report's description of a 100-pound Xtina was very publicly questioned by Wendy Williams; and the fuzzy mugshot from her public intoxication arrest was leaked.

"Anonymous friends" heightened the atmosphere of blaring-sirens crisis by telling Us Weekly and TMZ that she should go to rehab.

But a rare piece of good news came with the announcement that Aguilera will join Adam Levine and Cee-Lo Green as a coach/judge on NBC's new talent-search show The Voice. Whether this appointment is a sign of her smoothing out or a precursor to yet another trainwreck, her troubles have already become catnip for the Taiwanese animators Next Media Animation.

At least she hasn't starred in a detourned comic strip yet?