Malcolm Brenner really loves dolphins—like, really LOVES dolphins.
But, not in the way you and I may love dolphins, oh no!
Malcolm Brenner loves dolphins…. in the biblical sense.
Her name was Dolly...she was a dolphin..
The Florida man—because, of course he's from Florida—really loved one dolphin in particular.
And, that dolphin was named Dolly.
Brenner has written a book about the unique “love affair" he enjoyed with Dolly—so, if you love to read about dolphin sex, then this is your lucky day.
The book is titled, Wet Goddess—yep, really—and the Amazon description reads:
Set at the height of Vietnam protests, Jimi Hendrix and LSD, Wet Goddess is a story of strange encounters, awkward misadventures, and ultimately, love.
A love so pure
Ah, is there any love so pure as that between one man and his dolphin?
Brenner certainly seems to believe not.
The former investigative journalist embarked on his great mammal love affair back in the 1970s—but the story came to light again recently, following the release of a short documentary.
Titled, Dolphin Lover, the 15-minute movie details the “love affair" from Brenner's viewpoint.
Because, Dolly can't give her version of events, by way of being a dolphin. And dead.
You can watch the documentary, in its gloriously delusional, insane, entirety, right here on Popdust.
The way Brenner tells it, that little mammal minx actually seduced HIM—after he first met her during a visit to Florida Land in the early 70s.
Brenner was just 19 when his and Dolly's eyes first met across an empty pool.
He says upon initial introduction, “there were no intimations that this dolphin and I would become lovers eventually."
He goes on to share that he was “fascinated" by Dolly, and that he was “enormously interested" in her.
Brenner says he slipped into the water, and initially Dolly wouldn't come anywhere near him, because “dolphins are suspicious of strange people."
And with good reason it transpires.
However, Dolly's resolve soon crumbled, and before Brenner knew what was happening, he was being subjected to her dolphin wiles.
I started rubbing her forehead—she seemed to enjoy that—so I started rubbing her back, working my way down towards her tail. And as I was rubbing her, moving my hand towards her tail, Dolly started slowly rolling around her long axis.
By the time I got midway down her body I was rubbing her belly instead of rubbing her back.
And she swam forward so that I was rubbing her genital slit, and then she stopped moving.
I thought, 'This is embarrassing.'
Brenner and Dolly, back in the day...
Brenner offers up more details on how he was “courted" by Dolly:
When I would get in the water with her, she would approach me, unafraid. She would solicit attention. I never fed her, I never gave her any food rewards. Her courtship as it progressed got more vigorous and intense.
She would rub her genital slit against me. And if I tried to push her away, she would get very angry with me.
One time, when she wanted to masturbate on my foot, and I wouldn't let her, she threw herself on top of me and pushed me down to the bottom of the 12 foot pool.
That Dolly! Doesn't she know about playing hard to get?
No man wants it served up cold on a dolphin flavored plate!
Change of seduction plan
Well, it seems Dolly soon learned that lesson, as Brenner explains a change in Dolly's seduction technique:
Eventually she seemed to get the message that that wasn't going to work. She became very gentle.
She might open her jaws and run her teeth very gently along my arm, or my leg, which produced an amazingly erotic feeling to me.
Which I think was her way of saying to me, 'look, I'm very strong, but I'm not going to harm you.'
He later describes, in more detail than you could ever possibly want to envision, exactly how he had sex with the “very passive" dolphin.
“She was very gentle, she was very cooperative, she was enormously erotic," Brenner says—and we're going to leave it at that.
He claims Dolly received great pleasure from their sexual liaisons, that she climaxed, and that post-coital, they would “stare into each other's eyes for a couple of minutes."
Victim to aggressor
Brenner's logic, thinking, mental framing and conclusions are akin to those of a text book sexual abuser.
His romanticizing of non-consensual sexual acts—because, let's face it, a dolphin isn't really capable of giving consent—his blaming the victim, turning them into the aggressor and himself into the seduced.
He talks about “making love" to Dolly, waxes lyrical about their “very long courtship that lasted about half an hour."
At one point, Brenner puts forward his case for why he did NOT rape Dolly—and it's basically Pedophile 101:
You can't out swim a dolphin in the water. Michael Phelps could not out swim a dolphin in the water. A dolphin in the water is in its element.
We spent half an hour in courtship… if it had been rape it would have been easier for her to stay in the pen where the male dolphin would have protected her from me.
Instead, she chose to squeeze between a couple of boards and get into another pen where we had some privacy.
And what she ended up wanting to do, was to make love with me.
Zooaphilia is all about the love
Brenner talks openly and honestly about zoophilia—explaining it's different to bestiality, because those people just want to have sex with an animal and walk away—whereas he has tender, caring emotions for his animal partner.
Oh, and then there's the part where Brenner tries to draw a parallel between his zoophilia and mixed race sex.
But, moving quickly along.
Brenner admits his first sexual encounter with an animal occurred around the age of 11 or 12—when he tried to have sex with the family dog—a foxy little hound named Miss Cavell.
Apparently though, Brenner misread the signals, and despite the miniature poodle being in heat and having sex with a stud dog, she shunned his advances.
An experience he describes as an “embarrassing incident" and “not very romantic."
Oh, we feel ya buddy! Few things are more embarrassing than being blue-balled by the family dog.
On a serious note though, Brenner's candid confessions are also kind of heartbreaking.
He talks about “feeling unclean" about “wondering what was wrong with him" and why he wasn't having "normal desires for women."
“It made me feel abnormal," he shares. “It made me feel like I wasn't one of the guys, you know."
He pin points the first time he realized that he was sexually aroused by animals:
I first realized I was sexually attracted to animals when my father took me to see a Walt Disney movie called The Shaggy Dog, and strangely enough I found myself getting an erection, at 5-years old. After that, I was aware there was something different about my sexuality.
Brenner goes on to talk about what he believes helped form his highly taboo desires:
I think what made me a zoophile was the very intense physical and sexual abuse I suffered at the hands of a psychiatrist in my youth. Intense prodding, probing, pushing, squeezing of my musculature.
He performed fellatio on me when I was about 5-years old.
And, I have a very vivid memory of something forced up my anus.
Between this man's inappropriate sexual molestation of me, and my mother being a kind of cold, distant character, I think I found animals to be a safe and secure depository, if you will, for my sexual desires.
And, therein lies the crux.
Animals are not “depositories" and they are not created for the purposes of human sexual desire.
The exact same way children aren't—no matter how damaged and abused the sexual aggressor may be.
Oh, by the way, Brenner's "love affair" with Dolly may have broken plenty of taboos, but it didn't break any laws—at the time.
It took up until 2011 for the Sunshine state to finally outlaw sex with animals.
For more entertainment, music and pop culture updates and news, follow Max Page on Twitter.
How a cosmetics company representing African culture, vitality, and pride was "canceled" because of a known racist influencer.
As we're (finally) making more efforts to support Black-owned businesses, we should inevitably be wondering why there have been so few of them visible to mainstream consumers.
Within the astoundingly white-washed beauty industry, Black-owned brands account for a shamefully small fraction of the industry. This is especially egregious considering that, on average, Black women spend nine times more on beauty and hair care than white women. In 2017 Rihanna's Fenty Beauty released an inclusive range of 40 shades of foundation to wild acclaim, and the industry began to reckon with its lack of diversity.
Major brands like Dior, Rimmel, and CoverGirl have attempted to release more diverse shades, but their tactic of "diverse" advertising often commodifies and objectifies non-white skin tones. As writer Niellah Arboine critiques, "There is something really dehumanizing about calling [products] chocolate, caramel, mocha and coffee while all the lighter shades are porcelain or ivory."
Every year, Spotify listeners win out over devotees to other streaming platforms when they unveil their Spotify Wrapped playlists — a data driven analysis of what the year sounded like.
And while this year's personal Spotify Wrapped summaries are still loading, Spotify just released their data for their most streamed global music and podcasts of the year.
Announced the week following the Grammy nominations, Spotify Wrapped feels like vindication for artists who were snubbed by the awards committee, like The Weeknd and Halsey.
The summary also analyzed trends of when and how people were listening to content, noting increased popularity in nostalgia-themed playlists and work-from-home-themed playlists. Spotify users were understandably playing music from home more, which even caused an uptick in streaming music from gaming consoles. Listeners also tuned obsessively into wellness podcasts like never before.
After months of on and off again speculation, Rihanna and A$AP Rocky seem to be dating.
Obviously, this is good news if it's true. Can you imagine? For the coordinating outfits alone, I need it.
There have been a ton of icky white rappers over the years, but these take the cake.
On this day in 1990, Vanilla Ice's "Under Pressure" reboot "Ice, Ice Baby" debuted at No. 1 in the UK, kickstarting a Billboard run that would soon carry over to the states and invigorate a fleeting love for Vanilla Ice and his whole...vibe.
Of course, we all know how it ends. Vanilla Ice's credibility and career unraveled as quickly as it began. "Ice Ice Baby" took on a satirical identity larger than its creator, all while Robert Van Wrinkle refused to pay royalties (or even give a shout-out) to Freddie Mercury and David Bowie despite liberally sampling the track's true creators. Ice instead tried to cultivate a hollow rap identity, one where he was a hardened former-gang member from Miami and not a middle-class teen from a Texas suburb. The chorus of the song then came under fire by a black fraternity, who accused Vanilla Ice of ripping off their fraternal chant ("ice ice baby/ too cold, too cold.")
Bhad Bhabie<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="b713478c8d0b2ded9dc38ad30d984dd1"><iframe lazy-loadable="true" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZW4YGJRUgc4?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>Born from a meme, 15-year-old Danielle Bregoli has somehow maintained a relatively steady rap career these last few years, despite remaining ignorant to the culture she borrows from. Her outlandish behavior has seen no bounds. She <a href="https://www.eonline.com/news/1138116/bhad-bhabie-claps-back-after-she-s-accused-of-darkening-her-skin" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">darkened her skin</a>, <a href="https://metro.co.uk/2019/12/04/bhad-bhabie-defends-box-braids-hairstyle-accused-cultural-appropriation-11267702/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">spawned dreads</a>, and quelled critics with a shrug. "I act urban," she said. "You can't tell me I'm acting black because I braid my hair. That makes no sense whatsoever." </p><p>Regardless of Bhad Bhabie's inflammatory antics, she has maintained a profitable career, and to everyone's dismay, was even nominated "Top Rap Female Artist" at the 2018 <a href="https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/nielaorr/bhad-bhabie-iggy-azalea-eminem-danielle-bregoli" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"><em>Billboard Music Awards</em></a><em>. </em>Luckily, Cardi B won instead. Nevertheless, it is hard to picture where Bhad Bhabie fits into a culture she's so clearly milking for an image. </p>
Woah Vicky<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="9dd8d75a460357677027f74ca240d73a"><iframe lazy-loadable="true" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/TAN9ahGEaI0?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>People may remember Woah Vicky, Bhad Bhabie's equally as problematic foe, from a few years ago after a series of back and forth disses between her and Bhabie resulted in a few crude brawls. But Vicky's polarizing career actually came to fruition in 2017 after <a href="https://www.bet.com/news/national/2017/09/07/white-woman--whoavicky--says-she-can-use-the-n-word-because-of-a.html" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">she claimed to be black and allowed to use the N-word</a> despite being white. "Ancestry.com did tell me I was black," she says in the video. "So I have the right to say that I'm black." </p><p>The test told her she was 25% black, and she has since been regularly accused of "acting black" and "putting on a voice" that is not her own. She has since used her millions of followers to help kickstart a budding rap career, and the Bhad Bhabie beef helped establish a tough and even more problematic image. Many are hopeful it doesn't go much farther than it already has.</p>
G-Eazy<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="d90a905da844696eeb2f681c25ca9c40"><iframe lazy-loadable="true" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/HCQ6uf0HTGw?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>Bay Area rapper G-Eazy has continued to churn out lackluster pop-rap for years. His pop-laden sound has gotten cleaner and cleaner over the years, and as a result, he is often accused of <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/music/2014/jul/31/g-eazy-rapper-gentrify-hip-hop-interview" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">"gentrifying rap." </a>His moniker is no doubt a playoff of rapper Jeezy and Eazy-E, and while he has long dismissed allegations of <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/music/2014/jul/31/g-eazy-rapper-gentrify-hip-hop-interview" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">cultural appropriation</a> and acknowledged his guest status in Hip-Hop, it's still hard to respect him. </p><p>Maybe it's because he's a <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/music/2014/jul/31/g-eazy-rapper-gentrify-hip-hop-interview" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">coked-out woman abuser</a>, or maybe it's because he has seen an astronomical level of fame, mostly because of his skin color. Or maybe it is because of the time he <a href="https://www.barclayscenter.com/events/detail/g-eazy-logic-the-endless-summer-tour" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">darkened his skin on a promotional poster for a 2016 tour</a>. One thing is for sure: his music has never warranted the praise it's gotten, and his whole James Dean meets Drake image is just confusing.</p>
Denny Blaze<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6df2bd26d05fc815f89503a32b6a97a5"><iframe lazy-loadable="true" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/Uj5urT2VBxo?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>It still remains to be seen whether Denny Blaze, aka Average Homeboy, was ever in on his own joke. His viral YouTube debut "Average Homeboy" polarized everybody when it mysteriously appeared online in 1989. Many applauded the video's entertainment value that comes with watching a sincere teen attempt to playfully rap–Blaze's goofy suburban teen vibe would later be mastered by Lil Dicky, but in a way less problematic way–but Denny's seemingly well-intentioned rhymes played into some dangerous stereotypes. Aside from equating Blackness to crack use in "Average Homeboy," cringe tracks like "Black Men Can't Swim" would all but assure the demise of Denny Hazen's rap alter-ego.</p>
Kreayshawn<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="a136eb6f81d66dd41bd19a58790f7f43"><iframe lazy-loadable="true" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/6WJFjXtHcy4?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>Natassia Zolot, aka Kreayshawn, and the now-defunct White Girl Mob gained public attention after the release of Kreayshawn's "Gucci Gucci." The video accumulated millions of views and resulted in a lucrative record deal for Kreayshawn, but the single's coinciding video was accused of appropriating black culture, with Kreayshawn's doorknocker earrings <a href="https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/nielaorr/bhad-bhabie-iggy-azalea-eminem-danielle-bregoli" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">coming under particular scrutiny.</a> She soon ended up retiring from rap.</p>
Mike Stud<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="b51971360f1e52de266e58cc4ab0846e"><iframe lazy-loadable="true" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/KpDmPtz7noM?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>One of the sole-surviving frat-rappers of the mid-2000s, Mike Stud has maintained steady fame despite his awkward relationship with hip-hop. An all-American baseball player at Duke University, Stud took to rapping after an injury derailed his sports career. In 2016, <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/21/arts/music/white-rappers-geazy-mike-stud.html" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"><em>The New York Times</em></a> called him a "Drake clone," citing the fact that his recent traversal into sing-rapping with songs like "Say No More" are melodically similar to Drizzy in more ways than one. </p><p>"His signature catchphrase, a sort of elongated "yup," is essentially lifted from the R&B singer Trey Songz," <em>The Times</em> adds. He's now the star of his own reality series on The Esquire Network, a show that has come under fire for its "ode to binge drinking" and "Girls Gone Wild approach to gender relations." </p><p>Race is never mentioned by Stud or any of his constituents throughout the show, but the closest they come is when they showcase a very uncomfortable performance by Stud in Orlando, Fl, where he's standing among a crowd of Black people rather than drunk sorority girls. "It's a different lineup than we are used to," his tour manager tells the camera. "It's a weird vibe, but it's a show that we have to do." </p><p>Stud can be seen on stage rapping cautiously, trying to showcase respect by not leaning too hard into the fratty antics that normally make up a Mike Stud concert. "Mike Stud's understanding of the difference between his usual show and the Orlando outlier suggests at least a whiff of self-awareness about his unusual relationship to the rest of hip-hop," writes <em>The Times</em>.</p>
The black-and-white music video stars Paul Mescal, the gorgeous Normal People co-lead who shot to fame earlier this year thanks to his brilliant performance and now-infamous neck chain.
Mescal went from being a relative unknown to achieving a rare kind of superstardom this year; his boyish good looks and complexity made him the subject of many a profile.
As if that weren't enough of a high-profile collaboration, the video was directed by Phoebe Waller-Bridge, creator and star of Fleabag and the subject of many a Phoebe Bridge-related joke.
phoebe waller-bridge is the best phoebe bridge— traitor joe (@traitor joe)1559255143.0