For those of us who do not lift our tired and weather-beaten legs into the same Wednesday Addams costume every time the leaves begin to fall, Halloween is the holiday to dress. To reflect. What collective media moments added meaning to our life, what voices did we not locate but perfectly read? The Memes.
What truth do they speak? What will replace those terrible tinder costumes of 2015 (eww)?
Ken Bone! Even with that sordid reddit past, he remains the least unpleasant campaign 2016 meme! As the kind Abby Ohlheiser, over at The Washington Post, warns us, Ken Bone will be everywhere. Glasses, perhaps a mustache, and what some call "a red power cardigan." Easy stuff. Here's a real second debate first responder. Even the risqué folks at Yandy have gotten some press for turning it into something else altogether.
But, no! you say. Mr. Bone's distinctive Red Dahlia fashion sense is all sold out at your corner Izod. Keep the glasses, throw away the mustache and flex your fists: you're a few shades of mustard away from:
Quiet and barely suppressed rage. The 90s. Bring this marriage of emotions together and show you remember things that became re-relevant at least a few months ago. Once billed as a last-minute Halloween effort, Arthur's easy-to-find look is now pleasantly piquant commentary on the age of outrage.
Bonus points for taking along some headphones you're not going to listen to.
Take off the sweater, the glasses, and watch your friends gape as they see you become something anew. Or at least more than a few months old. Just try to find some affordable white vans at a store near you.
For the more authentic Daniel experience, the folks at famousoutfits.com have got you covered.
Cosmo already jumped on Sexy Harambe, which you probably should not be. Some amount of gorilla accouterments are to be expected, perhaps a profusion of masks. Save yourself the trouble and buy a t-shirt.
The Wall from Stranger Things
It's basically Christmas lights, your dad's Hawaiian shirt and the alphabet sharpie'd in. Spooky!
Or just buy a Donald Trump wig and act like a jerk. Like those tinder guys.