Ahh, the sweet sounds of fans booing, beers opening and plastered broskis arguing about stats they're probably getting all wrong, it's all music to the ears. Sports might be the only pure thing still left in this world, though unnamed individuals might slowly be ruining it. #FireGoodell. Still nothing beats watching the Yankees choke in front of a flat screen tv after a long day at work.
And for those that miss the games, luckily you have us, Barstool Sports, only the best sports blog to ever exist, keeping you covered by bringing forth the best of the sports world, game highlights, and the funniest meme-able content to hit the internet. Shoutout to our Day One Stoolies.
We know how much you love us and we need to make money to keep the oversensitive internet neighborhood watch off our backs, so we've got a whole online store of shirts for you to troll your friends with.
These shirts are for the BOYS, but chicks (especially smokeshows <3) can get down, too. Prove you can hang by adding them to the sad starting lineup in your closet.
1.
Larry the Gambling Goldfish 2018 Tee
Larry's only a goldfish, but he picks like a shark. He's not even a damn human and he probably has more Big Dick Energy than you. Wear this shirt if you want some to rub off. Who knows? Maybe you'll end up placing in the SuperContest, too.
2.
If you think this shirt isn't straight fire, then you're probably a Raiders fan. We get it, but grab a tissue. We can hear the tears from here. Now that the Monsters of the Midway have formed a solid defense, we can finally take them seriously. Buy this tee now or risk being a bandwagon sap later.
3.
Nothing but respect for the BOAT, the Best of All Time, Blake Bortles. Named the people's quarterback by the internet, this dude is probably the chillest guy on earth. Name another guy that would aspire to work construction and smoke cigs if he weren't an NFL player. Support the guy leading the Jacksonville Jaguars back to some sort of relevancy by wearing this shirt.
4.
Despite a few poor life choices and a questionable comeback season, Tiger Woods is still one of the greatest golfers to ever do it and he's back baby. This man rarely misses a hole. Don't try to debate us on his merits because we don't care. Buy this shirt and show some respect for the GOAT.
5.
If you're a Dwight Schrute fan– assistant (To The) regional manager, debatably the funniest character on the office and the GOAT of all beet farmers– then set your pit stains lose on this one Hard-working, alpha male, jackhammer, merciless, insatiable, you might never be him, but with this shirt you'll be one step closer.
6.
Some will debate Pete Wheeler was the one, but if you're real, you know Pablo Sanchez is the best cartoon kid to ever play the game of baseball. The GOAT of Backyard Sports. So good some haters have even accused him of steroid use. Check the stats. His skills were never a secret, but we're still dumbfounded he could actually speak English the whole time. Go ahead let out some nostalgic tears and get this shirt.
7.
Saquon Barkley is a beast. Just look at him. Even Eli Manning, can't stop staring at his legs. Unfortunately, he's stuck helping the Giants hold on to whatever legitimacy they have left. But, we can't deny it might be fun watching the new Beckham Barkley duo on the field. We've got our eye on this kid and so should you. Hop on the wagon early and get this shirt.
8.
As a quarterback the Jets can finally show some confidence in, the Darnold has arrived and is looking legit AF. Despite a few questionable performances (we'll chalk it up to rookieness for now), the kid is going to work. Merge your mildly-tamed 90's nostalgia with your probably non-existent Jets fandom and wear this shirt, football head.
9.
Shirt of the Month Subscription
Only true Stoolies will get this one. Show some love to the sports blog that gives the middle finger to the rest of the internet, as said by El Pres himself. Where else can you get your sports highlights while indulging in the best and dumbest of what the sports world and interwebz has to offer? We know you're loyal, but prove it by subscribing to the shirt of the month today.
