We've long wondered why we don't know or care much about Lady Gaga's love life, and perhaps this explains some of it—Lady Gaga doesn't appear to be that into it herself. In the latest issue of Vanity Fair, Gaga talks to the magazine about she's yet to experience the sense of fulfillment with a male romantic partner that she gets when chilling with her Little Monsters in the various arenas and outdoor pavilions of the United States. "I have an inability to know what happiness feels like with a man," the pop star dramatically states. "It starts out good...then when I'm in these relationships with people who are also creative, or creative in their own way, what happens is the attraction is initially there and it's all unicorns and rainbows. And then they hate me." Gaga also hypothesizes that when it comes to men, "What intimidates them is not my purse, it's my mind."

But maybe it's just that for Gaga, no single man can compete with the relationship she has with her millions of little ones. "When I fight with someone I'm in a relationship with, I think: What would my fans think if they knew this was happening?" she tells the magazine. "How would they feel about my work and about me as a female if they knew I was allowing this to go on? And then I get out [of the relationship]." She then (again, dramatically) summarizes: "I only know the happiness of putting a smile on someone' s face from the stage."

Awww, Stefani, don't fret. We're sure you'll find that special someone soon enough. It's a typical story, really—single woman contents herself with her millions of superfans and millions of superdollars, only to be swept off her feet when Mr. Right unexpectedly comes along. We bet Katherine Heigl'll play you in the movie, even.