Pokemon go Pokemoan dildos—it was only a matter of time before someone cashed in on the latest app craze, right?
Instead of having to go to all the effort of running around town in pursuit of catching 'em all—put down the Pokemon Go and pick up a Pokemoan dildo.
All the fun—well, probably a damn site more—all from the comfort of your own bed.
For some bizarre reason people are OBSESSED with the latest dumb Pokemon phone game.
At time of posting, over 75 million losers have downloaded it, and our Facebook is flooded with shit about this damn game we couldn't give a fuck about.
However, our interest was piqued by news of the Pokemoan sex toys range.
That's something we can really get behind—so to speak.
Etsy store, GeekySexToys is selling the range of Pokémoan toys—all of which are made using 100% skin safe silicone.
The line consists of three "starter" dildos—Bulby, Charmy, and Squirty, priced between $50.00–$69.00.
Here's the deets—as per the website:
Introducing our new range of Pokémoan sex toys!
Become the ultimate Pokémoan master with your new silicone friends.
Let your imagination run wild as you play under the sheets.
Choose your new companion wisely, the pokésex data below has all the information you will need.
**Please read in your best Pokésex voice:
Bulby–A grass type Pokémoan.
Bulby has a large seed tip making it a very pleasurable friend to have.
It's seed is 5cm wide and 4cm tall and its body is 16cm tall and 3.5cm wide.
Charmy–A slightly thinner, fire type Pokémoan with a flaming tail.
Standing 18cm tall and 4cm wide at its widest point Charmy gives intense orgasms everywhere it goes.
Squirty–A water Pokémoan.
Squirty has a smooth round head with a large grooved turtle shell on its back.
Its bubbly head measures 4cm wide whilst his body measures 6cm wide and 14cm tall.
Oh, and there's a Pikachu butt plug, too, if that's your thing.
And, it's an extremely "cute yet essential addition to your team" apparently:
Piky–This small electric type anal Pokémoan is a perfect size for the average Pokémoan trainer.
Piky is an extremely cute yet essential addition to your team.
Its insertable size is 2.5cm wide by 4cm tall and his tail is 8cm long.
Put down the Pokemon Go Pokemoan dildo range is where it's at – Gotta get em all!
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