Taylor Swift Trademarks Are Totally And Utterly Ridiculous

Taylor Swift Trademarks

Know anyone born in 1989?

If so don't even think about buying them one of those cute t-shirts or mugs emblazoned with the year of their birth, as they could find themselves slapped with a fat old fine for a trademark violation by Ms Taylor Swift.

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Taylor's team have applied to trademark a number of words and phrases she feels she owns: "Swiftmas", "And I'll Write Your Name" and "1989" amongst others.

You know what, she can have Swiftmas—I can't think of a single sentence I would ever utter that uses the word Swiftmas other than "what the fuck is Swiftmas?", and to be honest, am not entirely sure I care enough to ask. Maybe however, the right wing Christians who were picketing Starbucks about their holiday cups need to decamp to Swift HQ and have a word with TS for daring to tinker with Baby Jesus' birthday (are you listening Bristol Palin?).

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What's with  "I'll write your name"?  WTF? That's an every day phrase! To be able to copyright a word or phrase it has to be unique and associated with one person or thing in particular. Everybody uses the phrase "I'll write your name" and just because she uttered it in a song, doesn't make it hers.

And as for 1989—trademarking a year is so unbelievably narcissistic and ridiculous it is positively cringeworthy. You gotta be off the scale greedy to contemplate sending a cease and desist letter to someone who dares to use the year of their birth because it happens to be the same year you were born and decided to sing about it.

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Stop press—other things happened in 1989.  Swift's ownership of the year would mean that there would be no commemorating the fall of the Berlin Wall,  the Tiananmen Square protests, Tim Berners-Lee inventing the World Wide Web—hell  it was the year The Simpsons were born, so there are at least four things WAY WAY more important to the world than the birth of Ms Swift.

TayTay isn't only trademarking the words to ban them from use in a song title, oh no, they are being owned by her for clothing, books, magazines, brochures, websites and online retail services.  The thing is she isn't even using the words for half of those things, but she just wants to make sure no-one else can interfere with her future cash generating merchandising opportunities.

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So if for some fucked up reason the trademark gets granted and you were born the same year as tight-fisted Taylor, make sure you send her a royalty check every time you show your ID.

Merry Swiftmas™.

Taylor Swift Trademarks

Taylor Swift Trademarks

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