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The Strangest Christmas Specials in TV History

Should we just Cancel Christmas Specials?

Photo by Lex Guerra (Unsplash)
Christmas is an impossible holiday for pop culture to get right.
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Ingrid Michaelson

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Indie-pop artist Ingrid Michaelson teamed up with Jason Mraz to release "Christmas Valentine," a new song celebrating the magic of love and Christmastime in NYC.

Commenting on the collaboration, Ingrid says, "Jason and I toured together years ago, and I got to know his kind spirit. He really embodies what the season is all about. We were both on the road and had to record our parts separately, but when we finally got in the same room for the photoshoot, that incredible spirit was shining all around him!"


Ingrid Michaelson and Jason Mraz - Christmas Valentine (Amazon Original) Official Videoyoutu.be


Mraz adds, "Aww, Ingrid is the sweetest. I'm very flattered she thought of me, and I'm thrilled to be associated. I love holiday music, and I believe what Ingrid has created has the goods to become a new holiday classic."

Released as an Amazon Original, "Christmas Valentine" has retro '60s flavors and the incredible power of two iconic vocalists. "Just say you'll be my Christmas Valentine / I wanna make every day a holiday with you."

Follow Ingrid Michaelson Website | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | Spotify

Photo by: chadmadden / Unsplash

It's been a deplorable year for optimists.

Alternate facts, climate change, genocide, corruption, the looming threat of nuclear holocaust: It all equates to a not so holly jolly holiday season. For millennials it all felt so different a mere decade ago. The snow would fall slowly and stick to the ground for weeks on end, rather than evaporate in a few days. On Christmas Eve, many of us would curl up in our jammies with our families underneath a heavily decorated pine tree and watch all the varietal but thematically similar Christmas specials spewed across basic cable (Dolly Parton for some, Charlie Brown for others). We'd listen to these ridiculous, and at times problematic, Christmas songs and ignorantly bask in the holiday season's unrealistic cheer. It was all so campy and all so naive, but in hindsight, it makes some of us sigh with bitter nostalgia. What a gift it was to completely disconnect for a few days, to eat that shit up. But in 2019, the task feels insurmountable, even privileged, and offensive. But doesn't everyone deserve a break?

Christmas Makes Me Cry (From The Kacey Musgraves Christmas Show / Live From The Ellen D...www.youtube.com

Kacey Musgraves thinks so, and on her whimsical new Christmas special, it's impossible not to be charmed, or at least grin at its farce. Recounting Christmas shows of yore, Musgraves doesn't quite "reimagine" the Christmas Special as initially advertised, but instead delivers a traditional offering in shiny new wrapping paper a la Amazon Prime. Filmed on a live set, in front of a live audience, it's all quaint and theatrical. From can-can dancers dressed as candy canes to Troye Sivan's shimmering green blazer and pink button-up to a dancing reindeer to Musgraves fluorescent sparkles and shimmering red and gold dresses, it's all unapologetically in your face.

A Christmas special this exuberant wouldn't be possible unless the cast of characters were up for the task, and Musgraves does an excellent job of rounding up the most unproblematic, happy-go-lucky people in pop culture. No one else could sing Mele Kalikimaka with as much Bikini Bottom candor as Zoey Deschanel. Camila Cabello's voice is like butter alongside Musgraves, and Fred Armisen's bone-dry, dead-eyed demeanor as he's continually interrupted by construction workers while singing "Silent Night," (get it? Cause it's not silent), is reminiscent of the simple times of early SNL. All the while, Musgraves offers awkward quips of dialogue with charming sincerity. "I really, really appreciate you making the time to come here," she says to Lana Del Rey as if her surprise cameo was unplanned.

But the show's biggest highlight comes in the form of its narrator, Daniel Levy. While Musgraves delves into the holiday melodrama, Levy's playful sass contrasts Musgraves's campiness with a few bitter realities of 2019. "So Kacey had an emo moment in her bedroom," he says at one point. "Because sometimes, just sometimes, a great singing career, a bunch of Grammy's and this over the top bathroom just aren't enough." He jumps in at opportune moments to lightly criticize the most dated aspects of Christmas. When Musgraves asks Levy to remain cheery, he replies sarcastically, "Cheer? In this corporate political climate, okay, sure."

The commentary doesn't go much farther than that, but his frisky derision quells any cynics and attempts to silence critics who will undoubtedly find Musgrave's relentless optimism dated or insensitive. The politically active country star is a die-hard liberal, but Musgraves is also a massive proprietor for taking a step back from reality and engaging in simple pleasures every now and then. "It can be easy to forget that right now there are literally jellyfish that light up, and plants that can change your mind, and Northern lights and shooting stars," she told Billboard. Musgraves has an uncanny ability to warm the hearts of even the most bitter scrooges. It's what made Golden Hour such a captivating record, and while her Christmas special doesn't hold a torch in comparison, it radiates a similar narrative. Just play along. It's Christmas after all, and you deserve to feel happy, even if just for an hour or two.

The holidays aren't for everybody.

Known in the media world as the "Christmas Creep," Christmas advertisements emerge quietly in October and are sometimes in full force by the time Halloween costumes are tucked away. The music industry is no different. "The straight answer is the physical market," RCA Records co-president John Fleckenstein told Billboard. "Christmas albums tend to be multigenerational, and thus, they skew very heavily on the physical side." If big market stores like Target and Walmart want the albums to take off in time for the Holidays, October is the month to stock up.

But thanks to streaming, the demand for Christmas music has exploded even more, breeding some shuddering renditions as a result. It began this year with John Legend and Kelly Clarkson's gauche attempt to revitalize "Baby, It's Cold Outside" for the MeToo era. "It's your body and your choice," Legend sings.

While Christmas music may be well-intentioned, the era of streaming has produced some uncomfortable and unnecessary Christmas music. Here are the strangest holiday albums to emerge so far in 2019.

Rob Halford, Celestial

"And when I look up to the sky and let my soul release," Halford croons passionately over synth and acoustic guitar. "A warm embrace comes gently down and fills this heart with peace." Who knew Christmas could rock so hard! The British "Metal God" released Celestial this October, and its gravitas is abrasive. But maybe that's the point? Maybe some people just wanna break sh*t on Christmas instead of sipping sissy eggnog.