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8 of David Bowie's Most Iconic Film Roles

In addition to his music, the glam rock icon left behind an impressive legacy of memorable film roles.

David Bowie was a musical genius.

Prior to his tragic death from liver cancer in 2016, he cemented his legacy as one of the 20th century's most iconic musical voices with classic albums like Hunky Dory, "Heroes", and Let's Dance. But his musical talent was only part of what made him a living legend. His best work was intertwined with his talent for mythmaking.

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"Men in Black: International" Has Everything But Jokes

They can do anything they want in visual effects now, but they can't write a funny script.

High T (Liam Neeson) is in charge of MIB London branch where M (Tessa Thompson) is a rookie.

Credit: Giles Keyte. © 2018 CTMG, Inc. All Rights Reserved. **ALL IMAGES ARE PROPERTY OF SONY PICTURES ENTERTAINMENT INC. FOR PROMOTIONAL USE ONLY. SALE, DUPLICATION OR TRANSFER OF THIS MATERIAL IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED.

Will Smith made his last Men in Black film in 2012.

Since then, there have been lots of ideas for how to continue the franchise. The best idea was to recruit Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum from 21 Jump Street to become Men in Black. They couldn't work that out, but the idea of Men In Black lends itself to a new pair of agents having their own adventures. It wouldn't even preclude them from meeting Agents J (Will Smith) and K (Tommy Lee Jones) one day. Not the agents from Men in Black International, though. We don't ever want to see them again.

In 2016, Agents H (Chris Hemsworth) and High T (Liam Neeson) battled The Hive on top of the Eiffel Tower. Or rather, they're green screened into the scaffolding of the Eiffel Tower. 20 years ago, Molly saw her parents get neuralyzed, but she avoided the memory wipe herself and helped an adorable alien escape. She's spent her life looking for the Men in Black, and she'd be qualified as an adult (Tessa Thompson) if any of the government agencies like the FBI or CIA knew the Men in Black existed.

Molly's ambition could add to Men in Black: International a different dynamic than what J and K had. She finds the Men in Black herself and convinces them to make her Agent M. They can always neuralyze her if it doesn't work out. Then she impresses H and makes herself indispensable to him. In previous movies, Agent J mocked the whole operation, which worked for Will Smith, but M is a good role model to have in a 2019 Men in Black movie. Men In Black: International isn't really interested in M's ambition, and she and H just become generic buddy cops.

Men in Black International forgot to give H and M a dynamic. Oh, I just got that they're H & M. The movie doesn't play that up either. It's cast right; on paper, Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson should work. But they're not playing off each other. Agents J and K were the basic clown and deadpan straight man, because that's a comedy formula for a reason.

Men In Black International knows M (Tessa Thompson) and H (Chris Hemsworth) are supposed to be reluctant partners but can't figure out why. Men In Black International knows M (Tessa Thompson) and H (Chris Hemsworth) are supposed to be reluctant partners but can't figure out why.Credit: Giles Keyte. © 2018 CTMG, Inc. All Rights Reserved. **ALL IMAGES ARE PROPERTY OF SONY PICTURES ENTERTAINMENT INC. FOR PROMOTIONAL USE ONLY. SALE, DUPLICATION OR TRANSFER OF THIS MATERIAL IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED.

Instead, H is smug and swaggery, which Hemsworth can certainly play, but that's not a personality. Maybe if M kept up her ambition and got under H's skin, that would be something, but they ignore that once they're on the case. H razzes the alien Vungus (Kayvan Novak), but it's all made up insults about an alien physiology we've never seen before. How can we laugh about something they've just made up?

The only funny character is Pawny (Kumail Nanjiani), and he doesn't even show up until over an hour in. There are no zingers like, "I make this look good" or "It's raining black people." The name High T is a decent pun, and there are new celebrities identified as secret aliens, but you can only ride that joke so long. Agents M and O (Emma Thompson) have some amusing banter about the outdated gender norms of the name Men in Black, which almost goes somewhere and feels like dialogue Thompson probably punched up herself. When she's not in the scene, the movie is on its own.

Pawny (Kumail Nanjiani), the little creature on M (Tessa Thompson)'s shoulder, is the only funny character in Men in Black International. Pawny (Kumail Nanjiani), the little creature on M (Tessa Thompson)'s shoulder, is the only funny character in Men in Black International.Credit: Giles Keyte. © 2018 CTMG, Inc. All Rights Reserved. **ALL IMAGES ARE PROPERTY OF SONY PICTURES ENTERTAINMENT INC. FOR PROMOTIONAL USE ONLY. SALE, DUPLICATION OR TRANSFER OF THIS MATERIAL IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED.

At least Men in Black: International delivers on the international part. The movie goes to New York, London, Paris, and Marrakesh. This is the longest Men in Black movie, and it feels as long as its hour and 54-minute runtime. It tries to lead you to suspect H for so long when it's totally obvious which character you should really suspect.

They can do anything they want in visual effects now, but they can't write a funny script. Men in Black: International is loaded with more aliens, MIB gadgets, and firepower, but there aren't any jokes. When you don't have Will Smith to make up funny lines, you have to actually give the actors funny things to say.

In 1997, Men in Black had to be selective with its visual effects, so we probably only got to see the best ideas make it to screen. Now that Men in Black: International can have as many visual effects as a Marvel movie, it goes to show that Men in Black wasn't ever supposed to be a tentpole action franchise. Men in Black: International has a lot more set pieces, but none are anything we haven't seen before.

H and M have a gunfight with Alien Twins (Les Twins Laurent and Larry Bourgeois) wherein they shoot bigger guns, but it's the same destruction of a city block we see in every movie. H has a hand-to-hand fight in which he does the same flip over his opponent that every action hero does in every mainstream movie. They have high speed vehicular chases on green screens like the speeder bike chase in Return of the Jedi. Men in Black: International has nothing to add to the action/sci-fi genre.

Men In Black International I've got a bad feeling about this. Credit: Giles Keyte. © 2018 CTMG, Inc. All Rights Reserved. **ALL IMAGES ARE PROPERTY OF SONY PICTURES ENTERTAINMENT INC. FOR PROMOTIONAL USE ONLY. SALE, DUPLICATION OR TRANSFER OF THIS MATERIAL IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED.

What the Men in Black franchise had was comedy. It doesn't take a big budget to write comedy, but it's probably harder work. If Men in Black: International thought it could distract us from the lack of jokes, it was wrong. We noticed that we weren't laughing.

I want to talk to you all about the Kardashians.

But before you start violently typing out your pre-scripted opinions about their existence and prominence, I want to talk about someone else: Edie Sedgwick.

Edie Sedgwick was one of Andy Warhol's “Superstars”; a group of his friends who he decided one day to make famous, as an exercise of his theory that “everyone will be famous for 15 minutes.”

Edie Sedgwick wasn't a trained actress, or a singer, or a model, or anything of the sort. She was just pretty. And for no other reason than her association and close relationship with Andy Warhol, became famous. The logic being that since Andy was famous, anyone who he hung out with would become famous by association, regardless of whether or not they did anything to deserve the spotlight.

Fame is the most contagious disease there is.

Edie Sedgwick died of a drug overdose at 28. Had she of lived on, she would have easily been a household name. For no discernible reason whatsoever.

I bring this up in order to highlight an important fact about our entertainment industry—being a celebrity does not require a particular talent or skill, or any real actions of notoriety. At its core, fame is nothing but an exercise in social nepotism.

Your fame is measured by who you know, not what you know. If you have a relationship with the people who own the means of production (and in this came, fame is what is being produced), then you can achieve celebrity status for no other reason than a social association.

This is not a recent development signaling the end of times. It's literally always been like this. Except now, you've got more and more people purposefully gaming the system. And with the advent of the internet and reality TV, your ability to access people's lives has increased tenfold, thereby increasing the demand for celebrities. We need more people to vicariously live through so that we can temporarily escape our dull, demanding lives. Idolatry is human nature.

We, the general public, turn people into celebrities. You cannot turn yourself into a celebrity. In order for you to become “famous” as it were, it requires attention from the general public. If nobody cares about you, or if nobody wants to see you, then you cannot be a celebrity.

We create these careers, and we can end them just as swiftly. So if anyone receives attention that you deem unwarranted, it is not their fault. It is the fault of the people giving them attention; yourself included. Don't hate the player, hate the game.

Sometimes someone's celebrity is earned; we give them that status to celebrate an accomplishment or feat that we hold highly in terms of societal importance. Or you can just be a backup dancer in a shark outfit at the Super Bowl. Or make a sex tape with a washed up R&B singer. Humans are fickle and unpredictable like that.

Enter the Kardashians.

The Kardashians are the true American dream, whether you want to admit it or not. A family full of strong, independent, matriarchal, sex positive immigrant women who date and marry black men, with, Bruce Jenner, the stepfather in the family, transitioning into a woman. And, they're the most well known family in America. If that is not social progress, I don't know what is.

So where's the beef? Why the hatred and vitriol? None of them are in and out of rehab. None of them have any trouble with the law. None of them are having random children. They're not bigots, they're not murderers, rapists, adulterers, etc. So why are they so hated? Why is there such widespread ire against the Kardashians?

Well, most of it probably has to do with the fact that they're a family full of strong, independent, matriarchal, sex positive immigrant women who date and marry black men, with the stepfather in the family transitioning to a woman.

Just being honest.

But a lot of it has to do with this idea that they did not “earn” their fame the “right” way. That they got to this mountaintop the cheap way. The sleazy way. By gaming the system. By taking Andy Warhol's formula and morphing it into a 21st century model for success.

And to that I say: get the fuck over it. Honestly. If they had no worth and no social capital then they wouldn't be as wildly as successful as they are today.

Kim Kardashian is not the only girl from money to make a sex tape with a B-List celebrity. But she is the only one to parlay those 15 minutes into her own video game. She took a shitty sex tape and turned her entire extended family into entrepreneurial multi-millionaires in their own right.

That is absurdly smart of her. To try and downplay her accomplishments, hard work and efforts because you simply can't fathom a world in which Kim Kardashian isn't functionally retarded says more about you and your biases than it does about her.

These attempts to mitigate the Kardashians' success, or to downplay their work ethic. come from this patriarchal notion that there's no possible way that these women worked and earned their current place in society without simply sleeping their way to the top. There are too many people who have sucked way more dicks than Kim Kardashian who can't afford a cheeseburger for that to be true.

At some point, your personality, wit and work ethic has to kick in for you to have that kind of success.

 Was it maybe a little easier due to their last name and wealth? Of course it was. I'm not implying that anyone in that family sold crack to get to where they are. But they've been able to elevate themselves into a completely different echelon of fame and celebrity, and that was self made.

Let the Kardashians cook.

Love them or loathe them as a couple (or individuals) there’s no doubting they make cute babies!

Kim Kardashian has posted a super adorable photo of North, her daughter with Kanye West—and Popdust has the pic.

Instagram

In addition to showing off her beautiful baby in a little gray cashmere onesie and matching booties, proud mom Kim was keen to also name drop a super famous new artist friend of hers.

Kim Kardashian Keeps 90 Percent Of Proceeds From Philippines Charity Auction

“Art lessons! Jeff Koons & Nori #ArtBasel,” she captioned the pic.

Perhaps Koons is going to try and better the masterpiece of Kardashian that her besotted fiancé purchased from the late great Andy Warhol’s lesser celebrated cousin, Monica, that he recently purchased.

Kim Kardashian's Christmas Card Is All About....Well... See For Yourself

Koons is going to have his work cut out though, as evidenced here….

It’s likely that if he were alive today, Andy Warhol—arguably one of the most important and influential leaders in the Pop Art movement—would have been all over Kim Kardashian like a cheap perfume.

Warhol loved commemorating everyday, useless, vacuous objects by turning them into glorious works of art and was obsessed with celebrity culture, coining the now famous phrase in 1968 that "In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes."

How prophetic.

He also immortalized many of the most famous pop culture icons of his day, including Elizabeth Taylor, Liza Minnelli, Farrah Fawcett and Jackie Onassis.

Unfortunately, Andy is no longer with us—having died in 1987—however, Kanye West has found the next best thing it seems—reportedly dropping a cool $30,000 on the closest substitute to an Andy Warhol masterpiece of his dearly beloved fiancee……. one painted by Andy’s (still living) cousin, Monica Warhol.

Now, this may come as a surprise to many, but I’m no fine art aficionado… however, I does like what I like, so to speak… and in my very humble opinion Monica’s work is left a little lacking when held to the standard of her late great cousin.

But, hey, like I said, what do I know about this whole “art” thing?

In Touch magazine has an exclusive first look at Monica’s Kardashian masterpieces though—and, well, why don’t you decide for yourself?

In Touch

Despite having never actually met Andy, Monica does seem to be able to speak on his behalf, telling the New York Daily News, Warhol would have loved to have painted Kim because, “she's an icon, she's famous for nothing.”