Julia Rose

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On Sunday, Julia Rose and Lauren Summer—which are definitely their real names—made headlines when they flashed their breasts during the live broadcast of game 5 of the World Series.

While they didn't get quite as much attention as certain other attendees, they got enough to earn themselves lifetime bans from MLB events.



As far as I'm concerned, that's all great. Nudity is wonderful, being proud of your body is wonderful, and being an agent of chaos on live TV is among the best uses of anyone's time. But as it turns out, these women had much higher ideals in mind when they showed the world their breasts. They were apparently raising awareness for breast cancer, which, in case you weren't aware, is a type of cancer that occurs in the breast tissue and predominantly affects women. You probably hadn't heard of it before, because this is pretty much the first attempt at getting the word out—and there is no reason to think that awareness campaigns are the wrong approach entirely—but now that these women pulled up their tops at the World Series, you're finally aware, and you have the tools to contribute to prevention and treatment.



Oh, and they were also protesting the double standard that treats women's chests as fundamentally sexual objects, that need to be censored, while men are free to have their torsos exposed to the world without shame or fanfare. It's a fair point and the focus of the Free the Nipple campaign, which Julia Rose connects to their efforts. You can tell that this issue is particularly dear to these women because of the consistent effort they put into desexualizing their breasts. Almost every picture on their respective social media accounts practically screams, "It's just a chest, people! Get over it!"



Oh, and I almost forgot that they are also promoting Rose's digital magazine, SHAGMAG, which promises "SEX, BOOBS, SPORTS, UPCOMING ARTISTS & ENTREPRENEURS and a bunch of other fun surprises" and which Rose promotes as "the Millennial Playboy." It certainly sounds like the sort of place where you would find thoughtful discussion of feminist theory and women's issues.

Rose's mission statement puts it succinctly: "I wanted to create a (?)place that was fun but one that still had meaning. There is nothing wrong with sex and nudity, and wanting more of it but I definitely think our generation needs more of a voice. There are all these beautiful instagram models but who are they really? Who are the upcoming innovators and creators, and what the actual f*ck is going on in the world? So many questions and now there is an answer: SHAGMAG."



So… seriously? Obviously sex sells, and it's a recognized feature of our society that attractive young women can make solid careers out of selling it. If that's what they want to do, there's nothing to stop them, and there are some serious feminist arguments to be made for finding empowerment in the embrace of sexuality. But what does this half-assed veneer of selfless motives do for anyone?

Is your audience drawn in by the promise that SHAGMAG will explain "what the actual f*ck is going on in the world?" Or do they just want to look at some naked women? The entire business model is based on teasing at the edges of Instagram's nudity policy, so they can offer "exclusive and uncensored content" behind a paywall. So why bother appropriating Free the Nipple as your purpose—or breast cancer, for that matter—unless your goal is specifically to undermine the people who take these causes seriously?



As usual, the answer is probably to get people like me to write about it, and people like you to read about it, and it's clearly working well. Rose claims that SHAGMAG has already received $10,000 in new subscriptions, and she's planning future topless stunts.

Somehow it seems doubtful that any of that money is going to breast cancer research, but wouldn't it at least be nice if the shame of exploiting a good cause outweighed the temptation to draw in that extra attention? With that said, if you really want to pay a monthly fee to see an Instagram model naked, please consider any of the thousands of others who won't pretend they're being activists.

CULTURE

Sorry Joe Scarborough, Holding Criminals Accountable Is Exactly What Americans Do

"We are Americans, and we do not do that." Uh, yeah Joe, we do.

joe scarborough

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After making an appearance at Game 5 of the World Series, Donald Trump got an unexpected surprise–he learned that pretty much everybody at the game hated him.

In a karmic callback to the "lock her up!" chants that continue to arise at every Trump rally in reference to Hillary Clinton, baseball fans gleefully chanted "lock him up!" as soon as Donald Trump showed up on the jumbotron. (As an aside, Clinton was fully investigated by the State Department for using a private email, and while investigators agreed that her online behavior was not necessarily safe, they found "no persuasive evidence of systemic, deliberate mishandling of classified information." Trump's family has done the exact same thing while working in the US government, which seems ridiculously hypocritical, but what else is new?)

Here's Trump being publicly jeered during America's favorite pastime:


And here's his face after realizing what's happening. Hilarious:

While everyone who isn't an absolute troglodyte is fine with the American people voicing their disdain for an international mobster and 25-times-accused, alleged-but-pretty-much-self-admitted sex offender occupying the highest political office in the country, one bespectacled termite held tight to his pearls.

MSNBC Morning Joe host, Joe Scarborough––a man who has built a career on his inability to distinguish between a fencepost and a chair––had this to say:


"We are Americans, and we do not do that. We do not want the world hearing us chant 'Lock him up' to this president or to any president."

Except, here's the thing, Joe: Yeah. We really do do that.

The rest of the world needs to know that the majority of the American people reject Donald Trump. Currently, 54.6% of Americans disapprove of Donald Trump (40.6% approve and the rest, presumably, are in a collective coma). Over half the country currently supports opening an impeachment inquiry. And, while it's been said ad nauseum, it always bears repeating: Trump lost the popular vote by nearly 3 million votes. In short, Trump might represent America as a landmass, but he does not represent the will of the majority American populace.

In America, we should want criminals to be held accountable regardless of whether or not they are the President. We should want criminals held accountable regardless of whether or not they are Democrats or Republicans, or if we agree with their personal views. In the United States, nobody should be above the law. Especially if they're the President.

So, sorry Joe, but you're very, very wrong. Reach way up into your butt and pry out that fence post before it pierces an organ. The American people are speaking, and it's time to listen. Lock him up.