Jessica Springsteen, Kendall Jenner, and Gigi Hadid: The Myth of the Self-Made Celebrity Child

Sure, they worked hard for everything they have … but they didn't only work hard to get it.

A globally familiar last name will represent Team USA at the Tokyo Olympics: Springsteen.

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Gigi Hadid and Zayn Malik Are Expecting Their First Child, And It's Already Hotter Than You'll Ever Be

At just 20 weeks old, the fetus is reportedly much, much richer and more attractive than you'll ever be.

If you've been considering having a beautiful, Instagram-famous baby during self-isolation, don't even bother. Zayn Malik and Gigi Hadid beat you to the punch.

Vulture reports that the 25-year-old model and former hottest member of One Direction are expecting their first child together. Apparently, "family sources" have confirmed that Hadid is about 20 weeks along and the baby is a girl, according to TMZ. Boy or girl, this baby has the genes of two of the world's most beautiful people, and is sure to stunt on us all in due time. Imagine those cheek bones, those cupid-bow lips, that ethnic ambiguity! In a culture that robs beautiful, famous children of their childhoods through paparazzi harassment, sexualization, and criticism in the media, this baby is sure to be one of the MOST harassed and MOST sexualized of all! Look out Kardashian-West children, the Malik-Hadid infant is coming for your crown!

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Apparently Zayn Malik is the latest artist to fall prey to his label's efforts to control and possibly sabotage his career.

It all began when Brazilian producer Rafael Allmark spoke to fans privately about a collaboration with Zayn that was going to be released. The fans excitedly posted about the new song, which was supposed to be released today, February 12th. It began charting in some countries—but it turned out that Zayn had not known about or approved the song's release.

"The track was completed in 2018 but Malik's label would not let Allmark release it at the time due to Zayn's second album releasing soon," said the Twitter account @zayndata1 in an exclusive statement to Popdust. "Allmark claims he did not know that the vocals were Zayn's when they were first sent to him and only knew when he was instructed my RCA Records not to release the song… Allmark clarified that he was not comfortable releasing without Zayn's consent and it was extremely unprofessional that his label did not try to stop the release or ask consent from Zayn."

The song was pulled from the airwaves after Zayn's tweet, leaving fans stunned and suspicious.

After this incident, many fans are starting to question Zayn's label and his contract, which was orchestrated by Simon Cowell. They cited the fact that Zayn's last album, Icarus Falls, received inadequate promotion from the label, RCA. Some believe Zayn was the subject of a smear and suppression campaign by the label, which released physical copies of Icarus Falls two weeks late in many cases and even failed to release physical copies in dozens of countries around the world.

"The label is holding me back but I promise I am doing everything I can to get my music to you," Zayn tweeted in 2018 before the release of Icarus Falls.

Fans have reason to be suspicious of RCA, which is an imprint of Sony. Many artists have spoken out about abuse they received from labels under the Sony umbrella. When she was in an abusive relationship with manager Tony Mottola, the co-owner of Universal Group (an imprint of Sony), Mariah Carey had difficulty escaping due to the amount of control he exercised over her career. Similarly, Kesha's lawsuit against Dr. Luke, a producer who worked for RCA—Zayn's new label—claimed that the "Tik Tok" singer experienced prolonged sexual and psychological abuse, but Kesha has still been forced to pay Dr. Luke thousands of dollars in royalties. And the story of labels taking control of their artists is as old as the music industry itself.

Of course, maybe fans should channel their energy into supporting Zayn's music. The people have the power, and together, we can all give Zayn's music the attention it deserves.


Bella Hadid Shows Solidarity With the Poor By Wearing Wired Earbuds

The model recently made a statement by—gasp—not wearing AirPods.

In late 2016, Apple released what are arguably their most divisive product to date: the AirPods.

Priced at $159 and stored in a carrying case smaller than an Altoids tin, the AirPods quickly became synonymous with dispensable wealth. They're so precariously miniscule that by purchasing them, the wearer signifies that they could not only afford to buy them, but they could afford to lose them, too. Still, AirPods are an unavoidable accessory, sported by many on New York subway trains, by Wall Street bros and artsy Bushwick folk alike.

But it seems the AirPod craze might be simmering down. Around-the-neck straps have been popping up recently, defeating the entire purpose of such discreet earbuds. And to stir the pot even more, Apple recently unveiled the AirPod Pro, complete with noise-cancellation, an in-ear design, and—gulp—$250 price tag, much to the chagrin of consumers.

There's good news for the anti-AirPod crowd, however. Bella Hadid, whose net worth is reportedly around $25 million, was recently spotted out and about donning a pair of good old-fashioned wired earbuds. We're talking the kind that come with your new iPhone, or can be purchased separately for a humble $29.99.

Hadid has worn AirPods before—many times, in fact—but there is something very charming about her taking a walk on the wired side. Her look in these photos is plucked straight from the early 2000s, from her headphones of choice to her oversized suit, combat boots, and tinted blue shades. In a world where "stop being poor" has essentially become many government officials' solution to class warfare, Hadid's earbuds prove she stands in solidarity with those of us who aren't worth millions.

Or, maybe she just lost her AirPods that day.

Is runway modeling a skill? If you're a model, you might think the answer is yes.

You'd be wrong, though. Walking while also having good genes isn't so much a skill as it is just luck that you're attractive enough for people to convince you that it is.

Enter the runway crasher at the Chanel show during Paris Fashion Week. This brave woman sought to prove that even normal people with regular genetics could walk forward on a stage. So she bounded onto the runway like a force of nature, joining the line of slowly moving ladies in expensive clothes.

And as she walked into the distance, she blended in with the other ladies, proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that yes, literally anyone could be a runway model. In doing so, the Chanel catwalk crasher (known as "Marie S'infiltre" on her YouTube channel) walked for all of us, like a hero for the common folk.

But every folk tale must have a villain, and so the Chanel catwalk lady was confronted by international fashion superstar Gigi Hadid. As one of the top gatekeepers of the fashion world, Gigi Hadid can practically sniff out smaller, less angular people on her runways. "How dare someone not born into luxury, wealth, and beauty attempt to walk on a tiny stage!" Gigi probably thought.

So while the security guards floundered to do anything due to the crasher being literally indistinguishable from the "trained professional models" to the naked eye, Gigi took it upon herself to restore hegemony to the Chanel show.

Gigi physically grabs her, but not before our brave hero strikes one last pose, as if to tell Gigi Hadid and the entire world, "You may stop my catwalk, but you can never stop my spirit."

Thank you, Chanel catwalk crasher lady (who's apparently a French YouTube comedienne). Thank you for holding a mirror up to the absurdity of the fashion world and its absurd standards. You may not be the hero the fashion industry wants, but you're certainly the hero it needs.