CULTURE

Jenna Jameson Just Accused a Buzzfeed Reporter of Being a Pedophile

She has left the earth behind to become a full-blown right-wing conspiracy nut.

On Saturday night Jenna Jameson tweeted screenshots of a tweet and a blog post from Ryan Broderick, a senior reporter at Buzzfeed News, with the text "You monsters can't hide, we see you."

The tweet was part of a series on the topic of elite pedophilia that Jameson sent out Saturday evening, including a link to a video attacking Rick and Morty creator Dan Harmon for "Daryl," an offensive sketch he made in 2009. According to the video that Jameson shared, a comedic performer using a doll to simulate sexual crimes (in undeniably poor taste) is evidence that he actually endorses those crimes, and according to Jameson's tweet, screenshots of jokes Broderick made eight years ago indicate a "persistent sexual attraction to children."

Jenna Jameson is possibly the most famous adult film star of all time, and she used that career to launch a massively successful website and a best-selling autobiography. But you wouldn't know that from scrolling through a Twitter timeline dominated by tweets praising Donald Trump, attacking Planned Parenthood, and criticizing vaccination laws. It's not how she earned her fame, but to more than 720,000 twitter followers, Jameson has become little more than an unhinged conservative commentator.

When Jameson left the adult film industry in 2008, she did so with a dramatic proclamation that she would "never, ever, ever spread my legs again in this industry. Ever." Since that time she has gone through a number of transformations, including becoming a mother to three kids, converting to Orthodox Judaism, going sober, and achieving some dramatic weight loss. But none of her transformations can compare to her political realignment.

Jenna Jameson Weight Loss Instagram

During the 2008 Democratic primaries she was a vocal supporter of Hillary Clinton and resented the fact that Republican administrations often targeted the adult film industry "to make a point," but by 2012 she had shifted to supporting Mitt Romney, citing economic motives—"When you're rich, you want a Republican in office." A few years later, seemingly motivated by a growing antipathy for Islam and a suspicion of Syrian refugees, Jameson announced her support of Donald Trump in November of 2015. And in various tweets since then she has attacked LGBTQ acceptance, endorsed T.I.'s concern for his daughter's hymen, and promoted military action against Iran. So far so awful, but there's nothing that unusual about the politics of patriarchy and hatred in America. Things only become really weird when hateful people attempt to take the moral high ground from the rest of us.

According to the worldview of people like Jenna Jameson, anyone who thinks abortion rights should be protected hates babies, and anyone who thinks children should be taught not to feel shame about sex and sexuality has some nefarious motive. According to them, any sense that we are trying to build a more humane world can only be a front to cover up some evil plot. Enter Comet Ping Pong and the Pizzagate conspiracy.

Pizzagate

Hollywood, Democratic politicians, and the liberal media elite are all, apparently, entangled in an elaborate satanic child sex trafficking operation that involves coded social media posts and a basement in Washington D.C. that doesn't exist. The fact that a social media account for a pizzeria with ping pong tables makes frequent references to cheese pizza and features images of children playing ping pong is a deeply suspicious puzzle, the name Alefantis is an alias based on the French "les enfants," and a gay man can not care about children without being a pedophile. And central to the whole scheme is the woman Jameson once hoped would be president: Hillary Clinton.

These are the absurd overreaches that separate the Pizzagate conspiracy from the sickening reality that the Jeffrey Epstein case began to lay bare. It has become an undeniable fact that there are networks of wealthy pedophiles who use their power to protect themselves and each other from exposure and prosecution. In many ways this revelation has come as part of a general change in the conversation around sex abuse.

People like Dan Harmon and Ryan Broderick probably don't need to push the envelope with jokes about horrifying sexual crimes when there are prominent figures getting away with those crimes on a regular basis—and with the assistance of law enforcement and powerful members of the media. But the idea of looking back at old jokes from 2009 or 2012 and seeing them as evidence of participation in those crimes is absurd. It implies that literally everyone in the media is involved and has known about these crimes all along. It implies that Tom Hanks is a monster. And that kind of implication is the foundation of Mike Cernovich's "journalism"—of which Jenna Jameson is apparently a big fan.

Since inspiring a man to take an assault rifle into Comet Ping Pong in late 2016, alt-right star Mike Cernovich has focused on cataloguing jokes about child molestation as evidence of actual perversion and involvement in the vast child abuse conspiracy. Ryan Broderick became his latest target in a recent post to his personal website shortly after Broderick published a story that led to the deplatforming of a pro-Trump group that was pushing a conspiracy theory about the Coronavirus. According to the conspiracy theory—which Jameson herself helped spread—a Chinese scientist, who was identified for the purposes of doxing, had created the Coronavirus as a bioweapon for the purposes of sterilization and population control.

Cernovich has been helping to spread misinformation on the topic, and it's hard not to see it as retaliation when he sifts through thousands of tweets to find a joke—since deleted—mocking men who identify themselves as hebephilic to avoid the label of pedophile. Ryan Broderick's 2012 tweet pleading for Barack Obama to legally differentiate "between us good-natured hebephiles and amoral pedophiles" could hardly be more obviously intended as a joke, but that is not a legitimate defense in Cernovich's worldview.

He has previously used similar tactics to get director James Gunn fired from the Guardians of the Galaxy series—a position to which he has since been reinstated. It's kind of his whole deal. What's strange is to see Jenna Jameson falling for this, and being sucked so thoroughly into this kind of conspiratorial thinking that she ends up sharing homophobic propaganda from decades past. Five years ago, Jameson was tweeting support for gay marriage in the United States. Over the weekend she shared a link to a piece of protest writing that has been misconstrued and held up as proof of a pedophilic "gay agenda" since the 90s, in efforts to suppress gay rights.

Where did this come from? There is generally an expectation that someone with a background in sex work will have fairly open and accepting views when it comes to the politics of sex and sexuality, but in all her social media profiles Jameson ignores her past and chooses to label herself as a mom above all else. The natural fears that come with raising children seem to have combined with shame about her past, a convert's religious zeal, and a ton of right-wing propaganda to send her racing away from openness and acceptance. She has converted to a faith that tells her that so much of what she did with her life was wrong—that even her tattoos are wrong.

She wants to protect her children from the kind of mistakes she made and from so many of the scary things in the world. Terrorist attacks, school shootings, sexual predators, bullies. It's understandable that the world could start to seem like it's aligned against her—like there are powerful forces trying to corrupt and harm her children. And even efforts to help children, if they don't match her own plans, start to look like insidious plots. Vaccines will give your children autism. The coronavirus will sterilize them. And sex ed will send them down a sad, dark path that their mother knows too well.

With all the real-world problems that she wants to protect her children from, Jameson has allowed right-wing paranoia to infect her worldview. Religion, nationalism, and the politics of sexual repression provide a sense of shelter… but they also lead her to accuse a random Buzzfeed writer of being a pedophile. She has fallen fully down the conspiracy theory rabbit hole.

Jenna Jameson and Farrah Abraham put on a simulated sex show for their lucky Celebrity Big Brother housemates last night—and it was every bit as revolting as you would imagine.

The only thing missing was a donkey, but the gruesome twosome made the best of it anyway, writhing around in a chocolate sauce filled paddling pool, simulating anal sex, vanilla sex and some good old fashioned scissoring—and you can watch video of their performance right here on Popdust.

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As previously reported, Abraham and Jameson are currently across the pond wreaking havoc day in, day out, in the name of reality television, making for, what can only be described as, glorious train wreck TV.

Jenna and Farrah took a break from their past few weeks of non-stop cray cray, bitching, fighting, confrontation and just general all round insanity, in order to showcase their natural talents in a segment titled Celebrity Show Off.

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And, show off they did, with not one, not two, but three separate sexi-times themed performances, kicking off with Jameson reading some self-penned erotic literature (don't give up the day job love), followed by Farrah delivering a sexual health seminar, and culminating in the sex show.

E.L. James would likely hang up her 50 Shades of Grey pen if she had the chance to catch Jameson's literary masterpiece, which she read aloud, over a soundtrack of heavy breathing.

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“As soon as I entered the CBB house I knew it would be a sexual odyssey," Jameson began. “I could feel the sexual tension immediately as I noticed James undress Farrah with his eyes."

“Before long I felt a pain deep in my loins for Gail, while Sherri was taken from behind by Bobby. Janice then reached sexual ecstasy with Natasha, before Scoop charmed Chloe-Jasmine.

“Eventually, all the housemates enjoyed a romp that was tighter than a pair of James' underwear."

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Next up, Abraham—acting decidedly more Coquettish Farrah than the Insane Bitch Farrah that we've come to know and love so well.

Sporting a pair of Sarah Palin-esque glasses, the 24-year-old treated us all to a lesson in how to effectively use a condom (something she obviously came to later in life, given her Teen Mom status).

Abraham's penis stand-in prop of a banana, allowed for a slew of nod, nod, wink, wink, size quips, worthy of the great Bobby Davro himself, who looked on appreciatively.

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And then, the pièce de résistance….

After slipping in to something a little more comfortable—i.e.: skin tight jumpsuits—and arranging their hair into school girl style bunches, the toxic twosome got down to business.

Warming up by squirting each other with chocolate sauce amid squeals and laughter, the two progressed to showing off their best porn star moves—with Jenna taking the lead, appropriately, given her veteran status.

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Farrah was soon back to her usual crazy self again though, following her performance with Jameson, as she boasted about her sex tape, claiming (incorrectly) that her cinematic masterpiece, the beautifully titled Backdoor Teen Mom, outsold Kim Kardashian's.

(Vivid Video's Steve Hirsch debunked her bullshit—telling TMZ sister site, Fishwrapper that although Abraham's tape initially got more hits than Kardashians, the latter has actually outsold the former by 100 to 1.)

Meanwhile, as Jenna and Farrah toned down their Mean Girls act, it seemed the rest of the housemates were ramping up the cray cray—courtesy Janice Dickinson.

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The self-titled original supermodel is driving everyone around her to the brink of insanity, as her crazy loud snoring is leading to serious sleep deprivation.

Austin Armacost is taking the insomnnia-fueled fury lead, tearing into Chloe-Jasmine Whichello once again over her “disrespectful" alcohol avoidance techniques.

Not surprisingly, the X Factor loser was left in floods of tears (as per usual) whilst fiance Stevi Ritchie gave his very best Incredible Hulk impression, warning Austin not to get him angry…because, oh shit son, "I'm like Hulk when I'm on fire."

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"I don't want to get into any arguments ... I'm just a chilled fucking guy," Stevi vowed. "I respected Austin's night the other night. I totally get what you say but I've got to stick up for my girlfriend."

And so, the insanity continues….

Jenna Jameson and Farrah Abraham are turning out to be the most insane and deranged double act to terrorize England since Fred and Rosemary West.

As Popdust previously reported, Jameson and Abraham are currently taking part in the British reality train wreck, Celebrity Big Brother—and the level of their conceit, self-obsession and delusion beggars belief.

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The toxic twosome has done an absolutely sterling job of isolating themselves from the rest of the CBB cast with their insane, screaming, confrontational profanity-laced Mean Girls behavior—but, for some utterly unfathomable reason they truly seem to believe they have the moral upper hand over their cast mates.

Adding yet further to the delusional insanity, Jameson and Abraham, also seem to believe they are also morally superior to the rest of the cast—with Jameson, who has starred in 178 porn flicks, branding Natasha Hamilton a “whore” for having had four kids from four different men.

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In fact, at some point they’ve called pretty much all of their female cast mates whores, in addition to accusing all of the males and females of being “fake” “phony” “two faced” and “backstabbing”…. without even a hint of irony.

Things were taken to a whole new level of glorious delusion on Sunday night though, when Jameson and Abraham unwittingly (and oh so appropriately, given their humungous fake asses) became the butt of the joke.

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The cackling cronies are currently squirreled away in a private luxurious room inside the house, believing they have been voted there by the great British public, because, presumably, the great British public loves them both so damn much.

And, let's face it, what’s NOT to love?

Jameson and Abraham have been afforded the opportunity to spy on their cast mates, who believe the toxic twosome has been evicted from the house, and have been celebrating their departure accordingly.

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Jenna and Farrah’s faces were an absolute picture when they looked on in indignant, horrified disgust as their cast mates danced around with joy and jumped up and down on Farrah’s bed, singing Ding Dong the Witch is Dead.

Then there was Chloe-Jasmine and Stevi Ritchie discussing the possibility of selling the discarded underwear that Jenna had left behind.

“Men would pay a fortune for her old G strings,” Chloe-Jasmine observed, prompting a furious Jenna to fume and bitch, as if it was the most insulting and disgusting suggestion she could possibly ever imagine, being the bastion of morality that she is.

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But shit got real real when Jameson and Abraham were told by Big Brother that they would get to secretly judge a talent show featuring their cast mates and would have the power to choose the least and most talented performers.

Now, if there’s one thing these two love even more than themselves, it’s power…. so, not surprisingly, they were delighted by the announcement.

“I love that WE finally get to judge THEM,” a smug looking Jenna declared, as she and Farrah settled down in their chairs, plastering on yet more make-up.

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First up was Farrah’s most hated adversary, Natasha, who belted out the Atomic Kitten hit, Whole Again.

“That song is crap,” Jenna opined.

“I don’t know, I’m not digging it,” Farrah sniffed.

“She can sing,” Jenna admitted begrudgingly, “I’m glad she has some talent because her personality is shit.”

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Next up was James Hill, sharing tips on how to be a successful businessman.

“I’m the most least talented in this room,” the former Apprentice contestant kicked off. “Biggest things to becoming a successful businessman are knowing who you are.. what you’re good at…”

“He failed at being an entrepreneur, he failed here,” Farrah opined, “All he can do is suck off people.”

“Then there’s my physique of a Greek God..” James quipped, prompting Farrah to observe, “He’s not even Greek…”

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Chloe-Jasmine and Stevi took to the stage for a truly terrible performance of (I’ve Had) The Time of My Life, complete with really bad dancing.

“They are terrible….. what the fuck! What is happening?” Jenna wailed. “Train wreck like I said… they need to be voted off just because of this. That was awkward and made me very uncomfortable.”

Next up, Austin Armacost, who stripped down to his undies and threw some catwalk shapes.

“He said that I don’t have talent, that’s fucking no talent,” Farrah fumed.

“He’s completely embarrassing himself…. cheers to your epic, untalented ass,” Jenna bitched.

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Sherri Hewson managed to escape pretty lightly after giving a dramatic reading of Hamlet, which is more than can be said for poor Janice Dickinson, whose talk about her life as a supermodel was met with disdain and derision by the terrible twosome.

“Shut the fuck up…we’re rejecting your ass right now,” Jenna snapped.

But, it was Bobby Davro who really ramped up the dramarama with his impressions of the CBB housemates.

“Look, he’s going to be crappy to us, watch,” Jenna (correctly) predicted.

“I feel like I’m going to throw up,” Farrah announced.

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Davro’s impression of Abraham, which involved a huge pregnant stomach, was met with a frosty silence by his secret critics, before a stony-faced Farrah decreed, “That was, like, an epic fail.”

However, the Teen Mom quickly regained her sense of humor when it came to Davro’s impression of Jameson, which incorporated a red do rag round the head and a gigantic pillow stuffed down the back of his pants….

Farrah openly sniggered as a furious Jenna looked on in disbelief.

“So, he’s just like attacking me and my whole appearance?” Jameson fumed.

Not surprisingly, Fatman Scoop performed In the Club, which has received more playtime during this season of CBB than the 11 years since its release combined.

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And, not surprisingly once again—given that he’s remained more neutral than Switzerland throughout the show so far, and is the only cast member that’s managed not to piss off the toxic twosome—Jenna and Farrah raved about his performance.

Leading to—not surprisingly—Jenna and Farrah decreeing Scoop to be “Most Talented” and, Bobby Davro, “Least Talented”... along with a brief personality assassination of the British comic.

Farrah, “He’s such a pathetic….”

Jenna, “loser….”

Farrah, “jealous…..scumbag…”

Jenna, “Pervert psychopath…”

Farrah, “I feel sorry for his family…”

Jenna, “I would be ashamed…… that’s all he could think to describe me.. is to put a pillow in his butt… I like to think I’m a little more rounded than that…..”

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In addition to their judging privileges, Jameson and Abraham also got to nominate three housemates for eviction—and their choices were every bit as predictable as their Mean Girls schtick.

First: Austin—because he’s “heartless.”

Second: Natasha—for her “lying behavior” and because “she’s cruel and rude and nasty”

“We do not backstab people,” Jenna declared. “We’re the heroes.”

Third: Bobby, because:

“He is an evil man, he is cruel, he is judgmental, he doesn’t care about others' feelings on any level…I can not say enough hateful shit towards that man,” Jameson ranted.

“He is a darkness, he is an evil person, I think the example is when he was just laying in on me… saying untrue things about myself… it was unbelievably satanic,” Abraham decreed.

“And going in on me about my physical appearance….like, if that’s all that he has…I’m sorry to the public out there… to girls who are voluptuous,” Jameson fumed. “It’s evil and gross and I hope that he goes to hell.….. that may be harsh, but ….sorry.”

“I know, he’s a bad person,” Abraham sniffed.

“Hashtag losers,” Jenna chimed in.

“Hashtag we win,” Farrah concluded.

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Their winning streak was short lived however, as the cast mates were filled in on what’s been going down, and told that Jameson and Abraham had actually not been evicted.

In fact—the cast mates were informed—the fake eviction, was actually a fake, fake eviction, with the joke being on the toxic two—the three cast mates they had nominated for eviction actually now have immunity and it’s up to the rest of the cast to get themselves “evicted” by landing themselves on Abraham and Jameson's ever increasing shit list.

“Big Brother will warn you when Farrah and Jenna are watching…. and the only way to save yourself is to disgrace yourself,” the cast were told.

Meanwhile, Abraham and Jameson remained blissfully unaware of the shock twist, thinking they still had the upper hand, crowing about their great fortune, plotting their triumphant return to the house and continuing to tear their housemates limb from limb.

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“Dumb asshole” Farrah sniped about Sherri Hewson, before declaring Natasha to be a, “Fake ass bitch.”

“We had conversation and you still talk shit….with your McDonalds eyebrows,” Jenna railed as the camera panned in on Natasha.

“I’ve made history on TV, decreased teen pregnancy,” Farrah declared after James slammed her for having no talent during a discussion on the difference between being a reality TV star and appearing on a “credible” show like the Apprentice.

“You lost on the credible business show, you fuck, idiot…” Farrah fumed, prompting Jenna to jump in, “Shut up James.”

“Fuck you James,” Farrah railed.

“If [Farrah] was here today what would she have done?” Austin pondered aloud. “You can’t mold your vagina on stage…”

“I’m famous for my vagina,” Jameson declared.

“Yeah, we are famous for that...and God bless us,” Farrah agreed.

“God bless my beautiful vagina,” Jenna decreed.

“You ugly little bitches,” Farrah concluded.

Jenna Jameson is currently taking part in the UK Celebrity Big Brother and has been left with 'health concerns' after a gruesome task to try to win some food for the house.

Jenna, aka The Queen Of Porn took part in the hilarious task that involved her having buckets of fish guts, cold vegetable soup and rotten cheese poured over her head whilst wearing a set of waders.  It was cringeworthy reality TV at its best, but Jenna was not happy.

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She furiously announced to other bemused housemates in the bedroom, "I had rotten cheese in my vagina. There were like chunks! I swear if I get a yeast infection, somebody's going down. I have never gagged so much in my life, that's saying a lot!"

Well, she said it!

Jenna is the world's best known porn star and veteran of 178 adult films and we challenge her assertion that rotten cheese is the worst thing she's ever had in her vagina.  She's had Ron Jeremy up there FFS!

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To add insult to Jenna's smelly vajayjay'd indignity, the stinking food drenched housemates then had to take to the dance floor to throw some shapes to Fatman Scoop's song Be Faithful—which given the amount plays it's had during the past two episodes of CBB, must have lined Scoop's pockets with more royalties than he's earned so far during the whole life of the song since it's release in 2003!

Housemates get their groove on..

Meanwhile, Jameson is holding her own (pun intended) in the CBB house which pitches the UK contestants against the U.S. housemates. She's formed an alliance with Teen Mom nutjob-turned-amateur-porn star, Farrah Abraham, which may prove her undoing as Abraham's behavior becomes ever more volatile, vile and unpopular.

Abraham has become increasingly ostracized in the house due to her rude, ignorant and downright cray cray outbursts—and she has taken to the diary room on several occasions to rant about her fellow housemates—on one occasion threatening to "kill them all".

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British comedian Bobby Davro hit the nail on the head during a face to face nomination when he told Farrah, "You are possibly one of the ugliest people I have ever had to have the misfortune of sharing my time with. Why you have so much vileness inside of you that comes spilling out every time you feel as though you are being attacked.  It's so unattractive, it's so dreadful to watch. No amount of lip gloss can disguise the ugliness inside of you."

Ouch!  He was spot on, and a clearly rattled Farrah responded by accusing him, and all the Brits of having Satan inside them.

OK then.

As a veteran adult actress it’s pretty much a given that Jenna Jameson has faked a thing or two on camera over the years.

And, it seems the 40-year-old is continuing to hone her acting skills, this time for the benefit of Couples Therapy viewers—as a source tells Popdust exclusively that Jameson is totally feigning her “troubled relationship” with John Wood, 34.

According to the source, who has known Jameson for twenty plus years, not only are the retired porn star and the MMA coach pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes—including VH1 executives—when it comes to their supposed relationship woes…in reality, they’re not even in a relationship….

“Jenna and John are totally faking it,” the source says. “They’re not even dating each other, let alone fighting, or concerned about their future together—pure and simple, it is all for the money.

“Jenna was bragging that she got $250,000 to be on the show, and although that’s probably an exaggeration, it’s likely she did actually get somewhere around the $200,000 range.

“John and Jenna did have a couple of drunken hook-ups back in the day, after she found out Tito was cheating on her with John’s ex, Amber Nichole, but the only reason that happened was because she thought it would fuck off Tito—and that plan didn’t pan out well at all. Tito couldn’t have given less of a shit if he tried—in fact, he was relieved to have Jenna off his back, albeit for a brief time.

“Jenna made the decision to fake a relationship with John for monetary and publicity reasons, she’s absolutely desperate for cash and publicity. It’s crazy when you consider how much she was worth back in the day, but she’s totally hurting for money right now—her life is spiraling out of control and she will do pretty much anything if the price is right.”

As Popdust previously reported, Jameson has been struggling to keep it together since losing custody of her twin sons to Ortiz last year, following her arrest on DUI charges—fast forward a year, and she’s not finding it any easier.

“Jenna’s an absolute mess right now,” the source says. “Each time I’ve seen her recently she’s been totally wasted—she’s really not coping. I would put money on Tito’s accusation that she’s hopped up on Oxycontin, she’s certainly displaying all the signs, and she’s eating Xanax like candy.

“It’s a truly sad state of affairs, and she’s doing a really good job of isolating and pushing away all and everyone who has ever genuinely cared about her. I don’t know how this is going to end for Jenna, but I have a sinking feeling that it’s not going to be good.”

Meanwhile, according to a well placed VH1 source, Jameson and Wood aren’t the only faux couple currently undergoing therapy courtesy reality TV doc Jen BermanTodd “Too Short” Shaw is also allegedly faking it for the cameras, pretending he wants to rekindle his romance with ex-girlfriend, Monica Payne.

The source claims show producers flipped a lid recently after it became apparent they had been duped by the rapper, who was paid a whopping $200,000 for his appearance.

Trashy reality TV is back with a vengeance, thanks to the new season of Couples Therapy—which, three episodes in, already promises to be one of the best/worst/same same no difference.

This week, Dr. Jenn Berman, got all up in Jenna Jameson’s grill after she advised Nikki Ferrell (The Bachelor star, Juan Pablo Galavis’ “fiancee”) to tell show producers to “suck a cock”—thereby setting herself up for an ironic boomerang. Right in the facial…. I mean face.

How anyone could be shocked by the veteran adult actress doling out such advice is mind-boggling, but the esteemed doctor put on her very best show of righteous indignation and anger.

“You Jenna, I think you are sabotaging Juan Pablo and Nikki,” Berman railed, pointing a manicured nail in the direction of Jameson, before continuing, “When you sit there and you tell her to tell the producers to suck a cock, when you tell the producers, when you tell her to tell a producer to suck a cock, it’s the same as telling ME to suck a cock, and it’s the same as telling the therapeutic process to suck a cock.”

The therapeutic process? Hahahahaha!! “Sabotaging Juan Pablo and Nikki”? Hahahahaha!!

OK, here’s the back story to Cock-sucking-gate:

The episode had kicked off with Ferrell getting all agro with camera operators for like, trying to film her while she was on set. HOW DARE THEY! SHE’S NOT ON A REALITY TV SHOW TO BE FILMED!!

The acrimony escalated further after Nikki complained about Juan Pablo filming an interview for the show in their bedroom, for, like two hours.

Dr. Jenn, in a Machiavellian moment of PR wizardry, explained that the cameras are necessary to the therapy process, as they force the couples to stay "accountable" for their actions. Right, because the goal here is to help people. Not to score ratings and….oh, maybe make some money.

Dr. Jenn eventually wrangled all the couples together for a sit-down, during which she scolded Nikki for hurling a number of profanity-laced tirades at producers.

Nikki seemed suitably contrite, so Dr. Jenn attempted to re-focus Nikki's attention off of the production crew and onto her relationship woes.

However, sister-supporting team player that she is, Jenna—who appears to have thrown an arm around all the ladies in the house—quickly butted in, rallying to Nikki’s defense, and insisting that she was within her rights to be pissed off at show producers if they intruded on her privacy.

That’s when the aforementioned cock-sucking boomerang flew right back into the porn star’s face—and a fistfight broke out, which culminated in a three-way lesbian kiss. Sadly, that footage has been lost. Or never existed cuz I just made it up.

Tune into VH1 Wednesday nights at 9/8c for all new episodes of Couples Therapy.