TV

A Bachelor Nation History Lesson: The Franchise's Wildest Moments

Here are the most notable yet lesser known moments in the franchise's wild and problematic history.

ABC

Before Luke P. came around for the Bachelorette Hannah Brown finally gave him a piece of her mind, the franchise had plenty of wild moments.

Nowadays Bachelor Nation is compromised of many new fans who are unaware of the series' past. A proper history lesson can allow a fan to be better equipped to converse, compare, and critique shows like The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. Here are the most notable but less-known crazy moments for those Bachelor Nation newbies.

Jesse Palmer Says the Wrong Name

Before getting to harsher realities of the program, we'll start with something light.

Learning 24 names during one evening would be difficult for anybody. The Bachelor season 5 lead, Jesse Palmer, happened to say the wrong woman's name. Instead of giving a rose to Karen, he accidentally gave it to Katie, someone he meant to send home on night one. Embarrassed, he extended the invitation for Katie to stay, which she unfortunately accepted. Katie deserved better!

Jesse Gives Rose to the Wrong Girl - The Bachelor www.youtube.com

Lindsay Yenter Reacts in the Best Way

During Bachelor Sean Lowe's season finale, he sent home frontrunner Lindsey Yenter. When he went to walk her out, she took off her heels in a smooth IDGAF move: big mood.

Sad Music - Sean Lowe says "Goodbye" to Lindsey Yenter - Bachelor 2013 www.youtube.com

2-on-1 in The Badlands

Before the emotional intelligence showdown between Corinne and Taylor, Bachelor Nation staple Ashley laconetti got into it with Chris Soules's contestant, Kelsey Poe. Their 2-on-1 was one of the most uncomfortable, dramatic dates the franchise has ever seen. Iaconetti called out Poe for being condescending; Poe then used her talking head segment to put Ashley down for generally being dumb, fake, young, and wearing too much make-up. The season was shot in 2014, which demonstrates how recent tearing down women was seen as okay.

The Bachelor - 2-on-1 Date Awkward Silence www.youtube.com

Skinny Dipping Seen Around the Nation

We remember when the season's villain, Courtney Robertson, won Ben Flajnik's heart on the 16th season of The Bachelor. Their engagement was a surprise to many. Similarly, viewers across the nation were shocked when the show aired the two skinny-dipping in Puerto Rico. In retrospect, the 2012 controversial moment now looks like a lot of good fun.

Ben And Courtney Go Midnight Skinny Dipping! | The Bachelor US www.youtube.com

Brooks Forester Breaks Up with The Bachelorette

The season 17 Bachelorette, Desiree Hartsock, was shocked and heartbroken when Brooks Forester broke up with her right before the finale. In tears, she seemed ready to choose and build a life with the contestant. Luckily, all ended happily for the lead; in 2015 she married the winner of her season, Chris Siegfrield.

Brooks Breaks Up With Desiree - The Bachelorette www.youtube.com

Everything Juan Pablo

Juan Pablo was the worst, most misogynistic Bachelor the show has ever seen. Andi called out the Bachelor for belittling her decision to be there, runner-up Clare told him off for breaking up with her after claiming he loved her, and yet he only told the winner, Nikki Ferrel, that he likes her "a lot," with a wink.

The Bachelor - Juan Pablo Tells Andi It's Okay www.youtube.com


Who Can Forget This Epic Moment from Monday's Finale of The Bachelor? www.youtube.com


Bachelor 2014 - Nikki Ferrell Gets The Final Rose www.youtube.com

Nick Viall Slut-Shames Andi Dorfman

Andi was never afraid to put a man in his place for his unwise words. On her Bachelorette season's "After the Final Rose" episode, Nick asked Andi why she had sex with him if she did not love him. The lead immediately rejected the inappropriate, sexist question, retorting that it was "below the belt" and should "be kept private."

Bachelorette Finale - Nick Confronts Andi About Sex Suite www.youtube.com

Kaitlyn Bristowe's Caught on Camera with Nick Viall

On Bachelorette Kaitlyn Bristowe's season, she decided to break from the format and be intimate with a contestant before the show's Fantasy Suites. Bristowe later received a lot of backlash for the decision. In fact, back to back Bachelorettes bore the brunt of the show's sexist double standard about sex.

Kaitlyn and Nick Get it On - The Bachelor www.youtube.com

Rozlyn Is Accused of Hooking Up with a Producer

The show has never and will never fully protect the women on any of the franchise's shows. On Jake Pavelka's season of The Bachelor, the production team decided to humiliate contestant Rozlyn Papa for having an "inappropriate" relationship with a producer to stir up drama. The unnecessary moment will go down in the show's absurd and emotionally abusive history. PSA: No matter what anyone says, Chris Harrison is complicit and the show doesn't need him.

Rozlyn Accused Of "Inappropriate" Relationship With TV Producer | The Bachelor US www.youtube.com

Jake Pavelka's On-Air Breakup With Vienna Girardi

The winner of Jake Pavelka's season, Vienna Girardi, broke down during an interview with Pavelka and host, Chris Harrison. As Girardi begins to explain herself, Pavelka butts in; when she tries to get in another word, he verbally reprimands his fiancé. The Bachelor continued to mistreat Giardi, truly looking like a psychopath comparable to Luke P.

Jake and Vienna's Breakup - The Bachelor www.youtube.com

A Blatant Racist on Rachel Lindsay's Season

Instead of giving the racist contestant from Rachel Lindsay's season a cameo on this listicle, the harassed contestant Kenny King will get the floor. The Bachelorette production gained a lot of criticism for completely mishandling their first black Bachelorette's season by casting Lee Garrett on the show—a man who once equated Black Lives Matter to "terrorism." Critics are still questioning whether or not the show even deserves to have another person of color lead the show after this complete mess.

Kenny Voices His Frustrations About Lee - The Bachelorette 13x4 www.youtube.com

Emily Maynard's Daughter Is Not Baggage

Single mother Emily Maynard shot down contestant Kalon after word spread that he called her daughter "baggage." Maynard refused to tolerate that and immediately sent him home like the badass she was.

The Bachelorett- Emily Vs. Kalon www.youtube.com

Brad Womack Chooses No One

Brad Womack stunned viewers across the nation when he ended up with none of the 25 contestants from his season. While the Bachelor came back to lead a second season, he has still yet to find love, even after becoming engaged to the future Bachelorette star, Emily Maynard.

Brad Picks No One - The Bachelor www.youtube.com

The Jason Mesnick Move

Before Arie Luyendyk Jr. broke up with Becca Kufrin to chase after the runner-up and his now wife, Lauren Burnham, in a historic, unedited scene, season 4 Bachelor Jason Mesnick broke up with the winner, Melissa, for Molly on-air. As the wildest moment on the franchise, this laid the foundation for Luyendyk Jr. to also get ripped apart by America's Bachelor Nation. Fortunately, all worked out for everyone involved; Jason and Molly are still married 9 years later and have a daughter named Anne, along with Jason's son, Ty. Arie and Lauren also are living happily ever after and have a daughter, Alessi Ren.

Jason Rejects Melissa for Molly - The Bachelor www.youtube.com

The Bachelor's Juan Pablo Galavis and girlfriend Nikki Ferrell have reportedly broken up - and it's already very ugly.

Multiple sources have confirmed the news to Us Weekly and is seemingly backed up by both Juan Pablo and Nikki's Twitter accounts.

Season 18 Bachelor winner Nikki is no longer following JP on social media, and posted this message earlier:

"Isn't it pathetic how we waste so much time on certain people and in the end they prove that they weren't even worth a second of it," the 27-year-old shared, with the caption: "Nope not one single second."

A source claims the split was not mutual, with Nikki finally pulling the trigger on poor Juan Pablo, who tweeted this:

"Sometimes you WIN, sometimes you LOSE... You will ALWAYS learn..."

Bear in mind this is the man who responded to "I love you" with "I like you", and carried that on even while on VH1's Couples Therapy. In fact, Juan is widely considered to be the most hated Bachelor in history, constantly saying shitty thing to the female contestants and generally acting like a giant ass.

It clearly wasn't meant to be!

Trashy reality TV is back with a vengeance, thanks to the new season of Couples Therapy—which, three episodes in, already promises to be one of the best/worst/same same no difference.

This week, Dr. Jenn Berman, got all up in Jenna Jameson’s grill after she advised Nikki Ferrell (The Bachelor star, Juan Pablo Galavis’ “fiancee”) to tell show producers to “suck a cock”—thereby setting herself up for an ironic boomerang. Right in the facial…. I mean face.

How anyone could be shocked by the veteran adult actress doling out such advice is mind-boggling, but the esteemed doctor put on her very best show of righteous indignation and anger.

“You Jenna, I think you are sabotaging Juan Pablo and Nikki,” Berman railed, pointing a manicured nail in the direction of Jameson, before continuing, “When you sit there and you tell her to tell the producers to suck a cock, when you tell the producers, when you tell her to tell a producer to suck a cock, it’s the same as telling ME to suck a cock, and it’s the same as telling the therapeutic process to suck a cock.”

The therapeutic process? Hahahahaha!! “Sabotaging Juan Pablo and Nikki”? Hahahahaha!!

OK, here’s the back story to Cock-sucking-gate:

The episode had kicked off with Ferrell getting all agro with camera operators for like, trying to film her while she was on set. HOW DARE THEY! SHE’S NOT ON A REALITY TV SHOW TO BE FILMED!!

The acrimony escalated further after Nikki complained about Juan Pablo filming an interview for the show in their bedroom, for, like two hours.

Dr. Jenn, in a Machiavellian moment of PR wizardry, explained that the cameras are necessary to the therapy process, as they force the couples to stay "accountable" for their actions. Right, because the goal here is to help people. Not to score ratings and….oh, maybe make some money.

Dr. Jenn eventually wrangled all the couples together for a sit-down, during which she scolded Nikki for hurling a number of profanity-laced tirades at producers.

Nikki seemed suitably contrite, so Dr. Jenn attempted to re-focus Nikki's attention off of the production crew and onto her relationship woes.

However, sister-supporting team player that she is, Jenna—who appears to have thrown an arm around all the ladies in the house—quickly butted in, rallying to Nikki’s defense, and insisting that she was within her rights to be pissed off at show producers if they intruded on her privacy.

That’s when the aforementioned cock-sucking boomerang flew right back into the porn star’s face—and a fistfight broke out, which culminated in a three-way lesbian kiss. Sadly, that footage has been lost. Or never existed cuz I just made it up.

Tune into VH1 Wednesday nights at 9/8c for all new episodes of Couples Therapy.

Is there anything real about the reality TV show The Bachelor?

Well, you’ve got to wonder when you discover that one of the “cast-offs” has married her childhood sweetheart, just months after being eliminated from the hit ABC show—Popdust has details.

I mean, how serious about finding love with Juan Pablo was Renee Oteri and what would have happened if she had actually been his final pick?

Was being sent home by the controversial Bachelor just the incentive she needed to discover she was REALLY in love with someone else?

Or, GASP, did she just go on the show for a shot at fame and fortune?

Noooooo… surely not!!

Well, whatever the real reality Renee wed her childhood sweetheart, Bracy Maynard on Thursday—posting snaps of herself in her wedding dress on Instagram.

“…and THAT just happened! I married my best friend of 22 years!” She captioned one pic.

Renee's eight-year-old son from a previous relationship served as best man.

The 32-year-old, who made it into Juan Pablo’s final four certainly didn’t waste anytime moping around after being eliminated—in fact, she had already announced her engagement before the final episode of the Bachelor aired!

“She is so happy and has wanted this with her fiance for a very long time,” a source told UsWeekly. “He is always the one everyone wanted to see her with. She couldn't be happier."

Thank God our love affair with Juan Pablo ends tonight. He will go down in infamy as the worst Bachelor/person to ever exist on this earth, and I am so thoroughly excited for Nikki to break up with him and do a tell-all Us Magazine interview revealing his weirdest, most disgusting habits. I'll bet he sucks on his own toes. Anyway, this is the grand finale, through deconstructed quotes.

"The controversy centering around Juan Pablo has been unlike anything we have ever seen before on The Bachelor."

Who said it: Chris Harrison

Why he said it: What Chris means here is there was controversy surrounding Juan Pablo's comments on homosexuality and the mentally handicapped, on top of the controversy caused by his sad, stupid self.

"Today i'm gonna keep an eye on Claire to see how she interacts and how she fits into my family."

Who said it: Juan Pablo to the cameras

Why he said it: You know when awful guys know a girl is not for them but are too driven by their dick and sleep with them anyway and then start to resent them, when really it's them resenting themselves? This is what Juan Pablo's relationship with Clare is like.

"I love love love family."

Who said it: Clare-bear :(

Why she said it: Notice how there is no possessive pronoun before the word "family" here and it is just "family." Clare just loves family the way kids love snacks and sprinklers and when their dads spin them around. :(

"You got your ears pierced?" *feigns surprise* I love that!"

Who said it: Claire talking to Camila :\

Why she said it: Because she has no clue how to talk to kids I don't think.

"He's hyperactive. Super hyperactive."

Who said it: JP's mom to Clare

Why she said it: Great question. This is the kind of thing you say about a a fifth grader-- to their new babysitter, not to somebody who might end up marrying your son.

"What do you feel about your communication about Juan Pablo?" - Juan Pablo's mom

"I love it." - Claire

Why this happened: Wish I could explain this but instead I'll just choke-laugh it out over here.

"I could 1000% see myself as a part of Juan Pablo's family forever."

Who said it: Who do you think :( (Clare)

Why she said it: Because homegirl is s0o0o clueless it's beginning to get sad :( Notice how I've been sad facing all over the place :( :(

"Latinos are passion as hell."

Who said it: That guy in Juan Pablo's family. Either his cousin or his brother or his best friend or both.

Why he said it: It's true, latinos are "passion as hell." Juan Pablo, however, is not.

"I could not appreciate everything I am experiencing this much if he wasn't next to me."

Who said it: Clare

Why she said it: This is just a depressing quote and I'm gonna move on right now.

"Maybe he's not the man that he thought he was. I am so confused right now and I really don't know what to do next."

Who said it: CLARE

Why she said it: Juan Pablo said something nasty to Clare when there were no cameras-- something along the lines of "I don't even know you that well but I really like f%&#ing you" I'm going to guess-- and instead of not realizing how sleazy it is Clare STANDS UP FOR HERSELF and realizes that something isn't right.

"So that's why you didn't give me a kiss? Okay."

Who said it: JP, smugly, to Clare when she invites him over the night before the decision and she decides not to kiss him at the door

Why he said it: Cuz he's a f$*#ing dick.

"I have much more to offer a relationship than just [physical attraction.]"

Who said it: Clare, who is suddenly not a robot!!!

Why she said it: A lightbulb went off?

"Honestly do I see myself with you? Yeah, I could see myself with you, sure."

Who said it: JP to Clare, as unconvincingly as it sounds.

Why he said it: See two above^

"It was painful to watch. I could hear the collective sigh in here as she was starting to give in."

Who said it: Sean, The Bachelor from last season who is at the live show tonight. Sean seems mad cool guys, I'm pissed I didn't watch his season.

Why he said it: Cuz he's a real cool dude, apparently

"Every day I want something to happen that makes me feel better about that person."

Who said it: The indecisive idiot that is Juan Pablo

Why he said it: Well, the two girls he was really into dumped him, and now he's left with two girls he's not psyched on. So hopefully some love potion can drop from the sky for him so he can make some sort of decision. Yeesh.

"It has to be me. He can't have what he has with me with anyone else."

Who said it: Nikki

Why she said it: Sometimes I wonder if Nikki just wants to beat Clare, not marry Juan Pablo.

"Like I know my dad would be proud that I've opened myself up."

Who said it: Clare, as she walks toward JP :(

Why she said it: Alsakjdal;ksjdal;ksjalkdjs

"When you came out of the limo with the belly- I thought look at her..."

Who said it: JP

Why he said it: Ohhh right. I had forgotten how Clare was the one who was wearing a fake baby bump on the first episode. *Cringes*

"I wish the earth sucked me today because this is the hardest decision ever."

Who said it: Juan Pablo the baby

Why he said it: Because he is a hyperactive baby who can't make a decision to save his life

"This entire time I stuck around because I believed in you."

Who said it: CLAREEEEEEEE

Why she said it: SHE'S TELLING HIM OFF

"I'VE SAVED THIS MOMENT FOR THE MAN OF MY DREAMS BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE ONE"

Who said it: CLAREEEEEEEE

"I'VE LOST RESPECT FOR YOU"

Who said it: CLAREEEEEEEE

 "I WOULD NEVER WANT MY CHILDREN HAVING A FATHER LIKE YOU"

Who said it: CLAREEEEEEEE

"Don't get cranky now."

Who said it: Juan Pablo to Nikki after he gave her the rose but not the engagement ring

Why he said it: No clue. I genuinely have no clue.

"Why was 'I like you a lot' enough for Nikki?"

Who said it: CHRIS HARRISON, and all of us.

Why he said it: Because this entire season of The Bachelor was a waste of everyone's time. ALL THANKS TO JUAN PABLO.

 

The NYT Magazine did a quick interview with Chris Harrison, host of The Bachelor (and The Bachelorette) for a combined twenty seven seasons. It was a good interview, and it made me begin to understand how much of the show is real, and just how much of it is bullshit.

The strange realization I had is that I do not think much of this show is bullshit—that's why it's has been able to last this long, that's why it is so easy to get frustrated with these people. Because these girls aren't acting. They are genuine, hopeless romantics, lookin' for love.

I was hoping the "Women Tell All" reunion episode would be a revelation of sorts, where we really get to see just how wild things got between the girls and Juan Pablo, or at least between the girls. But really, seems like life behind the scenes is mad boring.

These girls are the same contestants we saw on the show-- a bunch of very nice, very level-headed women looking for a chance at love. The biggest surprise of all comes from one early season contestant Lauren S,  who lets off steam because she feels as though Juan Pablo didn't try hard enough to get to know her. From the ladies we got to know better, not much comes as a surprise. If you wanted Andi to dish about how "horrible" her Fantasy Suite night with Juan Pablo was, well, you should have watched the Fantasy Suite episode. Same with Sharleen-- behind the scenes, Sharleen's leaving wasn't any different. She just felt like Juan Pablo and her were not the greatest match, that's all. It sincerely hurt her to leave prematurely, to mess with Juan Pablo's feelings like that.

The two most intriguing of the girls-- the final two, Clare and Nikki-- are obviously not here tonight, which maybe is why the hour and a half special is such a drag city snoozefest. Clare and Nikki are still interesting because one of them might very well end up married to Juan Pablo. But in a world after Juan Pablo, who knows if we'll find Clare or Nikki so interesting anymore. Me? I already unfollowed Nikki on Instagram. Already bored.

If there is one thing I've learned from this season of The Bachelor it's that people still believe in true love—and they'll go on television to find it. That is pretty cool.

That's all for my light bulb moment. Tomorrow I'll be back archiving dumb quotes.