CULTURE

Worst Quotes of the Week: Vogue, Ellen DeGeneres, and Ben Shapiro

People say a lot of dumb sh*t. Sometimes I hear about it.

Rihanna

Image Press Agency/NurPhoto/Shutterstock

People say a lot of dumb sh*t.

Some of those people are famous, and then I hear about it. Here are the worst quotes of the week:

3. That Vogue Writer Who Didn't Prepare for Her Rihanna Interview

"Normally I bring a list of questions, but I didn't have time to prepare one..."

Look, when you're interviewing or profiling one of the biggest musical artists in the world, you should probably do your homework. I'm not going to go so far as saying there was a racial element at play, as was evident with The Hollywood Reporter's BTS profile, but there does seem to be a trend of white writers profiling major non-white artists and pulling this "I wasn't ready lol" stunt.

That being said, in the writer's defense, it sounds like maybe she really was given way too short notice for the interview. In which case, maybe just don't include that bit next time.


2. Ellen DeGeneres

"Just because I don't agree with someone on everything doesn't mean that I am not going to be friends with them. When I say, 'Be kind to one another,' I don't mean only the people that think the same way you do. I mean be kind to everyone."

This was Ellen Degeneres' response to people online who were angry at her for buddying up with former president George W. Bush, a nice old man who paints sh*tty pictures of veterans and also lied to the American people in order to propel us into the Iraq War.

Look, it's a nice sentiment and Ellen DeGeneres seems like a very nice lady. I'm not going to sit here and sh*t on her for pandering to her primary demographic of stay-at-home boomers who love her milquetoast pranks but also kind of low-key hate gay people. But we're talking about a legitimate war criminal here, a guy whose lies led to countless violent deaths and the destabilization of an entire region of the world. So instead of pooping on Ellen for her nice, "politically neutral" sentiment of buddying up with war criminals who think she's going to burn in Hell for eternity, here's her explanation juxtaposed with photos from George Bush's Iraq War.

Rafael Shimunov's Remix of Ellen's BS Explanationwww.youtube.com

1. Ben Shapiro

"You want a culture war in this country? You damn well have it, Beto O'Rourke...Because I promise you, if you come to tell me that you're going to indoctrinate my kids in particular policy and that I can't pull my kid out of the school and send my kid to a school I want to send them to...If you send a truant officer to remove my child, I have two choices at that point...One is to leave the country utterly. Two is to pick up a gun...Beto O'Rourke does not get to raise my child. And if he tries, I will meet him at the door with a gun."

This week, tiny lunatic Ben Shapiro attempted to take straw man arguments to a whole new level while essentially threatening to murder a political candidate he doesn't like.

Shapiro's rant was in response to Beto O'Rourke saying that if he were president, he would take tax exempt status away from any organization, religious or otherwise, that discriminated against LGBTQ+ people. How Ben Shapiro jumped from "Churches that discriminate against LGBTQ+ people will not get tax breaks" to "Officers will come to my home and remove my children, so I must kill Beto O'Rourke" is beyond me, but it's worth noting that Shapiro's brain is most likely a giant, malignant tumor at this point.

All joking about Ben Shapiro's soft, frail body and his almost definite inability to properly handle a firearm aside, here's the thing you need to understand about him: The only people who like Ben Shapiro are very, very stupid. They're so stupid that they can't hold functional conversations with anyone whose shoes aren't already in their mouths. They're so stupid that they've deluded themselves into believing they're capable of debate. They're so stupid that they actually listen to Ben Shapiro.

In other words, these people are incredibly dangerous. There's a reason that the Quebec City Mosque Shooter was a big Ben Shapiro fan, and I promise, it has nothing to do with him wanting to hold a debate.