CULTURE

Miley Cyrus Is Not a Queer Icon: Do Better

"I always thought I had to be gay, because I thought all guys were evil, but it's not true."

For those still celebrating Miley Cyrus as a queer icon, may we invite you to take a moment to reconsider.

Yes, she came out as pansexual and genderfluid in 2015, soon proving herself to be an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community by founding Happy Hippie foundation for homeless queer youth. Then, after ending her marriage to Liam Hemsworth, Cyrus briefly dated reality TV star Kaitlynn Carter before moving on to Cody Simpson, with whom she did an Instagram live on Sunday. Here's where things got...dicey, to say the least.

In the midst of the livestream, Cyrus stated, "There are good men out there, guys, don't give up. You don't have to be gay, there are good people with dicks out there, you've just got to find them," She said, while Simpson laughed. "You've got to find a dick that's not a dick, you know? I always thought I had to be gay, because I thought all guys were evil, but it's not true. There are good people out there that just happen to have dicks. I've only ever met one, and he's on this live."


Miley Cyrus: "You Don't Have To Be Gay"! | Perez Hilton www.youtube.com


Oof. Miley, honey, it's 2019! Twitter, of course, immediately popped the f*ck off.

Soon, Cyrus wielded a powerful, often misused celebrity weapon: the notes app apology.

So. There's a lot of toxicity to unpack here. Let's start with the easy part: Cyrus' implication that the only good man she has ever met is Cody Simpson. *Cue her father, brothers, and Liam Hemsworth giving the camera a long, Jim Halpert-esque look.* Misandry aside, Cyrus implied that 1.) Being queer is a choice. 2.) Dating men is always preferable to dating women, even if you're queer. 3.) Cyrus herself chose to date women because of a distrust for men, not necessarily an attraction to women. None of these things were addressed in her apology; in fact, she didn't even bother to claim that she misspoke or that it was meant as a joke. All she really did was re-enforce that men are sh*tty.

To be clear, for anyone still living in 1950, being queer is not a choice, dating within the LGBTQ+ community is not an exciting and temporary foray into counter-culture on your way to a heterosexual relationship, dating men as a bisexual/pansexual woman is not somehow inherently preferable to dating women, and you don't get to call yourself queer just because you find men annoying sometimes. Being queer is defined by being attracted to genders other than the opposite gender to your own, and again, it is NEVER a choice. Just a little bit louder for those of you in the back: BEING QUEER IS NEVER A CHOICE.

If you still aren't sure, here's some science for you: A 2019 study by Andrea Ganna, lead author and European Molecular Biology Laboratory group leader at the Institute of Molecular Medicine in Finland, said that while her study did not find a "gay gene," it revealed "there are a number of genetic variations that can influence sexual behavior." Essentially, the research reinforces that queerness is simply "a natural part of our diversity as a species." That means that women being attracted to women is not simply a matter of thinking "all guys were evil" and so resorting to women—it's a matter of bonafide, biological sexual attraction.

Please do better, Miley.

Culture Feature

​​This Haunts Me: The Shredded Cheese Wife Guy

One Texas couple became a meme after they went 18 minutes without shredded cheese on their fajitas. What could be worse?

Courtesy of Junkee

Karens. Even if you don't know them by name, you know who they are.

Karens have been asking to speak to managers all over American suburbia ever since Kate Gosselin debuted her infamous reverse-mullet on Jon and Kate Plus 8 in 2007. "Karens"—the collective nickname for middle-aged entitled white women who love nothing more than being pains in your ass—have been walking among us for quite some time, but as shelter-in-place orders and mask mandates have taken over the world, the presence of Karens has become even more apparent.

Last weekend, a Karen went viral in a since-deleted Tweet for a reason only Karens would empathize with. Jason Vicknair, a 40-year-old man from Allen, Texas, was just trying to enjoy his first date night out in three months with his wife at a Tex-Mex restaurant called Mi Cocina. Things took a turn for the worse.

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MUSIC

PREMIERE | Lucinda Belle Asks 'Where Have All The Good Men Gone?'

"The girl with the harp is who I am." - Lucinda Belle

Pop-noir singer-songwriter Lucinda Belle premieres "Where Have All The Good Men Gone?" on Popdust. The track releases tomorrow, so you get to listen to it before anyone else.

From the U.K., and deemed a child prodigy at the harp, everyone presumed Belle would grow up and become a celebrated classical harpist. She fooled everyone but herself by concocting a unique sound of her own, a sound conceived by influences from jazz, pop, hip-hop, blues, reggae, and classical.

Belle was in London, running a flourishing laundry business, when Decca Records spoke to her about signing with the label. She signed, sold the laundry, and pursued her musical aspirations. Now she's in California, where her dazzling talent opened vast doors: a 2015 Oscar nomination for Best Song, "Going Nowwhere,"in the film For No Good Reason (Johnny Depp), a role as Dixie Darling in Punch Drunk Theater Company's The Drowned Man, and working together with Annie Lennox, The Pet Shop Boys, Robbie Williams, Jarvis Cocker, Natalie Cole, Yes, Seal, Grace Jones, and Jamiroquai.


Lucinda BellePhoto Courtesy Lucinda Belle


In the coming year, Lucinda will be releasing her album entitled Think Big : Like Me.

"Where Have All The Good Men Gone?" opens with a plinking guitar and Belle's scrumptiously sensual voice, charming and flavored with a Betty Boop-like timbre that's massively alluring and slightly sardonic. In short, it's marvelously evocative and seductive.

The jazz-flavored melody oozes smooth bluesy savors, as well as frothing retro aromas and sparkles of pop. The combination is potent, riding a formidable rhythm and luminous harmonics full of edgy colors. The tune radiates a kind of deep pyrotechnic energy, simultaneously captivating, a little wicked, and plain old fun.

Put simply, "Where Have All The Good Men Gone" is splendid. It heaves with delicious colors, a cogent rhythm, and Lucinda Belle's delectable cynical/ingenuous tones. All I can say is, "Wowee!" This is grand music.

See Lucinda Belle live, September 26, in San Francisco.

Pre-order/Download: iTunes | Amazon

Follow Lucinda Belle Website | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram

Randy Radic is a Left Coast author and writer. Author of numerous true crime books written under the pen-name of John Lee Brook. Former music contributor at Huff Post.