Ranking the Strongest Video Game Ninja Girls to Step On Me

Which kunoichi could step on you the hardest?

Bandai Namco

Female ninjas occupy a strange space in the realm of video games.

While their male ninja counterparts, like Strider Hiryu, dress like actual ninjas in full body garb that maybe, at most, reveals their beefy triceps, female ninjas dress in hyper-colorful, skin-bearing attire that seems to scream, "I'm here to step on you, you degenerate gamer." As if "degenerate" and "gamer" weren't interchangeable.

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With the constant onslaught of complicated news that 2020 has brought, sometimes you just want to be able to shut off your brain, relax, and feel happy.

Enter comfort films. These are the feel-good movies that feel like a warm hug when you finish them, the ones that allow you to escape for a short while. We often turn to these types of films in times of trouble or extreme stress, and when we're not sure what films of this nature we should watch, we turn to the Internet for options.

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Sakurai Said Mai Shiranui Is Too Sexy for Smash Bros. He's Kinda Right.

Mai Shiranui may be a top tier anime girl, but that doesn't mean she fits in Smash.


Super Smash Bros. Ultimate game director Masahiro Sakurai loves SNK with a burning passion.

Sakurai made his passion crystal clear throughout his 48-minute Nintendo Direct breakdown of Smash's newest guest DLC character, Terry Bogard from SNK's Fatal Fury and King of Fighters, which almost plays out like a history lesson on SNK as a whole.

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate – Mr. Sakurai Presents "Terry Bogard"

But after extensively demoing all of Terry's special moves and unique gameplay mechanics and revealing 26 SNK cameo characters and a whopping 50 new SNK music tracks, one glaringly obvious hole seemed to be missing from the SNK Smash collab.

Mai King of Fighters SNK

"You may have noticed that a very important character from the Fatal furies series was not included," says Sakurai. "Yes, Mai Shiranui. Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is for good boys and girls of many different ages, so we decided not to feature her. Please forgive us."

Indeed, Mai Shiranui, SNK's next-level busty kunoichi and most popular recurring female character, will not be appearing in Smash because, as Sakurai suggested, she's simply too sexy for an all-ages game.

And yes, Smash features Bayonetta who wears skin-tight leather while she open-leg flip kicks. But here's Mai Shiranui's default outfit:

Mai Shiranui SNK/Koei Tecmo

And this is how she moves:

Mai Shiranui GIF SNK

Look, I'm not saying Mai Shiranui shouldn't have made a cameo in Smash. I'm just saying that Sakurai made a conscious decision not to show big bouncing anime boobs to 10-year-olds, and that maybe he made the right call.