Shit Christmas

Photo by Lex Guerra Unsplash
Melania Trump detests Christmas.
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Culture Feature

Donald Trump Doesn't Care About Republicans' "Family Values"

The party of family values has chosen a candidate without family values.

Donald Trump in 2003 with Victoria Silvstedt, 1997 playmate of the year, left, and his future wife, Melania Knauss, at a Playboy event.

Richard Corkery/NY Daily News Archive, via Getty Images

The Republican party has always been the party of strong family values.

Republicans have long championed the idea that families must be built with a strong moral compass at their heart. They must be built on strong marriages and good parenting. They must be built on trust. Donald Trump is an embarrassment to the party of traditional family values. Here's why.

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POLITICS

If Wikipedia Were Honest: Donald Trump

A profile of America's greatest conman.

Donald Trump

Shutterstock, By Evan El-Amin

Donald Trump

Donald John Trump (born June 14, 1946)–also known by the aliases John Barron, John Miller, and David Denison—is the former villainous star of reality TV show The Apprentice and current villainous star of actual reality.

Elected to the presidency of the United States—against the popular will of the voting public—by a vestige of America's history as a nation fueled by slavery, he has declared himself "the least racist person there is anywhere in the world."

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Donald Trump

Shutterstock; By Evan El-Amin

In the early hours of Friday morning, the White House announced that President Donald Trump and first lady Melania Trump had both tested positive for COVID-19.

The news came shortly after it was confirmed that top aide Hope Hicks had tested positive after weeks of travellng with the president to campaign events. As a result, Trump's reelection campaign has canceled a number of upcoming campaign events in battleground states.

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CULTURE

Apology for Previous Article: Pathetic White Women Are Also Big Mad That Greta Thunberg Is Time's Person of the Year

I apologize for my previous article. Plenty of white women are pathetic, too.

Swedish climate activist Greta Thunberg arrives to deliver a speech at the Assemblee Nationale, French parliament, in Paris, France, 23 July 2019.

Photo by IAN LANGSDON/EPA-EFE/Shutterstock

I'd like to offer my sincerest apologies for an article I recently published which, upon further reflection, I now realize was deeply flawed.

On December 12, 2019, I wrote an article titled "Pathetic White Men Are Big Mad That Greta Thunberg Is Time's Person of the Year." The conceit of my article was to laugh at all the lowest-performing white men pooping their nappies after TIME Magazine announced 16-year-old climate change activist Greta Thunberg as their 2019 Person of the Year.

My premise was erroneous, and from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I'm not going to give excuses or try to downplay the damage I've caused. If I could go back and start over, knowing then what I know now, please believe that I would do things differently. I'm sorry, and I hope you can accept my apology.

As soon as the article went live, I knew I had messed up. Yes, screeching, low-performing white men immediately swarmed into the comments to prove my point. They smashed boomer memes on top of boomer memes without an ounce of self-awareness, their dude-names emblazoned for all to see and their pasty white profile pictures glistening in the sun.

But another group of people showed up, too, equally angry and just as white, but not quite "male." Yes, in all my hubris, I called out pathetic white men without acknowledging their counterparts––pathetic white women who are also big mad that Greta Thunberg is TIME's Person of the Year.

Perhaps by not acknowledging these almost inconceivably stupid white women, who spit in the face of established science and also love throwing adult temper tantrums about a child with Asperger's who wants to make the planet more sustainable, I was engaging in latent sexism. After all, as many pathetic white women made crystal clear in the comments, they are just as capable as their pathetic white male brethren of being big mad weenies.

I acknowledge that roughly 52 percent of white women voted for Trump, and that your ability to launch into rambling, improper emoji-laden paragraphs full of CAPITALIZATION to indicate SCREAMING makes you pathetic lunatics just like the white men I was initially laughing at. To promote acceptance and reject racism, let it be known that anyone can become a pathetic white man or woman, just so long as they reject science, denigrate children, and believe everything they saw in a very biased YouTube video.

I want you to know that I respect your tendency to post low-IQ boomer memes just as mindlessly as even the dumbest of white men. It was wholly my mistake not to recognize that plenty of pathetic, angry white men are, indeed, supported by pathetic, angry white women. Otherwise, how else would you continue making more pathetic, angry white people?

I see you, pathetic white women who are mad about Greta Thunberg, and I hear you. And again, I am sorry for my error. Both pathetic white men and pathetic white women are angry that Greta Thunberg is TIME's Person of the Year, and in the name of gender equality, I want it to be clear that all of you are worthless.

I do feel a little bad insulting people who are mentally tantamount to children younger than Greta Thunberg, even if they're trapped in old, white bodies, but if our president can do it, so can I.

After all, as First Lady Melania Trump might say, "Insulting children on the Internet is what it means to #BeBest, unless anyone makes a joke about Barron, and then it's not okay." Or something like that; who cares, they're all hypocrites.

CULTURE

New T.I. Video: Politically Conscious or Disappointingly Sexist?

What's fair game in the battle for a more progressive country?

T.I.at Craig's Restaurant Los Angeles

Photo by Shutterstock

In one of the strangest combinations of people to ever come together in a headline, Melania Trump and rapper T.I. are butting heads.

The First Lady's spokesperson is asking people to boycott rapper T.I. because of his promotional video that shows a dancer resembling Melania Trump stripping. The video features T.I. in the Oval Office, watching out the window as President Trump takes off in the Marine One helicopter. The rapper then sits down behind the president's desk, and the Melania look-a-like walks in, drops her jacket that reads, "I Really Don't Care Do U?" and then, naked, stands on the desk. The unlikely pair later leave the office and spray paint over Trump's portrait.

T.I. released the minute long clip on his twitter, with the caption:

"Dear 45, I ain't Kanye. 😳" In a clear reference to Kanye West's support of President Trump, something T.I. has openly disagreed with.

Dear 45,

I ain't Kanye. pic.twitter.com/BCS8nkbn1M

twitter.com

In response to T.I.'s video debut, Stephanie Grisham, Trump's communications director, tweeted Saturday:

How is this acceptable?

#disgusting #boycottT.I. @Tip

https://twitter.com/etcanada/status/10512085916909...

twitter.com

Usually, we'd be raving about a politically conscious music video from an icon like T.I., and enjoying any displeasure from the White House, but in this case, we have to *shudder* agree with Grisham.

While it's difficult to argue with the intention of T.I.'s video — an obvious rebuke of the Trump administration — the manner in which T.I. goes about his criticism is questionable. The video moves from naked Melania to a montage of T.I. defacing parts of the White House, a sequence that suggests that T.I.'s implied sexual relationship with Melania is another aspect of the disrespect and property defacement aimed at President Trump.

This is an unfortunate continuation of an age-old trope, a trope that says sleeping with another man's wife is a way to seek revenge on that man, in most cases ignoring the agency of the woman involved altogether. This trope objectifies and minimizes Melania as nothing more than an extension of her husband.

Additionally, the artistic combination of sex and hate is a toxic one. Having been an outspoken critic of the Trump administration, it is doubtful that T.I. likes Melania Trump. Yet, he sexualized her in the video, even suggesting a sexual relationship with her. So, in the video, Melania is not only positioned as the property of her husband — an object to damage like the rapper damages the paintings in the later part of the video — but T.I. is also suggesting a connection between sex and a woman's domination. In positioning sex with Melania as a tool with which to seek revenge on the President, T.I. has — perhaps unwittingly — added to a culturally embedded, sexist narrative.

Don't get me wrong, the Melania look-a-like removes her clothes with full volition in the video, but keeping in mind how T.I. feels about the Trump administration, it's impossible not to see the video as an attempt to shame both the First Lady and her husband. This connection between female shame and sex is disturbing and is furthered by this video, regardless of what T.I. intended to say.

You may think this is a bit of an overreaction to an objectively interesting video aimed at damaging the current administration, and you may be right. But the conversation is bigger than a minute-long T.I. video. The conversation is about what is, and isn't, fair game in the fight to restore our country to progressivism. If we want to criticize and condemn Trump for his blatant misogyny and disturbing rhetoric about women, we can't suddenly turn a blind eye to these sexist narratives when they're used against him. A woman does not earn respect and humanization by behaving a certain way or agreeing with certain politics, it is her right.


Brooke Ivey Johnson is a Brooklyn-based writer, playwright, and human woman. To read more of her work visit her blog or follow her Twitter @BrookeIJohnson.


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