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"Game of Thrones" Win Proves an Emmy Is Worthless in 2019

Industry awards are all about industry politics.

71st Annual Primetime Emmy Awards - 22 Sep 2019 - Drama Series - 'Game of Thrones'

Photo by Rob Lour (Shutterstock)

I didn't watch the 2019 Emmy Awards.

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Game of Thrones - Season 8 Trailer

via youtube.com

As usual, the latest episode of Game of Thrones immediately lit the internet up with diverse opinions and takes, from fans freaking out about the presence of a Starbucks to-go cup in a scene to the Twitterverse bemoaning the poor quality of writing.

Among the more common protestations was the sentiment that episode 4 made it very clear that the show is written exclusively by men.




Perhaps chief among people's concerns about last night's portrayal of female characters was the GOT writers' choice to have Brienne run after Jaime—in her bathrobe, no less—and weep pitifully as he left her behind in the snow. While it's important to keep in mind that there is nothing inherently weak about displaying emotion, it is a very valid argument that Brienne's reaction to Jaime's desertion was extremely out of character. Not only that, but everything about the interaction was set up to make the knight seem womanly and desperate: she pleaded and wept, holding onto his face and spouting clichés like, "Don't leave me."

We've seen Brienne remain stone cold in the face of a great many tragedies, and while actress Gwendoline Christie is gifted at allowing hints of emotion to seep through Brienne's carefully constructed composure, we've never seen that composure crack entirely. That it would now—after just a couple of amorous nights with a neck-bearded, one-handed knight—feels unlikely. But when faced with complicated situations in which a female character's reaction requires nuanced thought and consideration, it seems the GOT writers just revert to unfortunate feminine stereotypes.

Episode 4 showed this weakness again in Dany's transparently power-hungry conversation with Jon. The dragon queen, who has undergone a massive character shift over the last few episodes—namely, from a three-dimensional character to a one-dimensional one—was presented as a stereotypical temptress in this episode. There was no nuance at all in her scene with Jon, and it became clear that her love for him—whether real or not—is something that she only views as another chess piece to be used in her quest for power. Not only is this a boring plot choice that removes much of the appealing humanity Daenerys once presented, it's a sexist choice that paints Dany as a sexually manipulative Bathsheba.

Sansa, too, has been suddenly simplified. In episode 4's conversation with the Hound, her implication that she was grateful for her rape was a wildly out-of-touch decision. Sure, there is nothing wrong with a woman finding strength in the knowledge that she has lived through great hardship, but Sansa has never been the blood-thirsty, dauntless character she was portrayed as in episode 4. Not to mention, to portray rape and abuse as a character-building experience is irresponsible and insensitive to the real experience of many women. Sansa has been a historically nuanced character, displaying tenderness and strength in equal measure—but not anymore.

It's as if, knowing they had to rush to wrap up the show in six episodes, the scriptwriters decided to save time by turning their female characters into easily palatable stereotypes of women. This is particularly unfortunate given the show's relatively strong track record for creating female characters with autonomy and storylines of their own, but it seems that when faced with time limits and pressure, the all-male writing team for season 8 just...didn't bother with the female characters.

While there is no question that Game of Thrones is a groundbreaking TV show in many ways, one can't help but to wonder how much more groundbreaking it could have been had women been a part of the writers' room.


Brooke Ivey Johnson is a Brooklyn based writer, playwright, and human woman. To read more of her work visit her blog or follow her twitter @BrookeIJohnson.


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Photo by Chris Curry on Unsplash

This week's episode of Game of Thrones left fans to deal with a lot of feelings.

Our bodies are full of the adrenaline of battle, grief for fallen friends, and the trauma of the horrible things we saw on that long, cold night. Yet, here we all are, wearing pencil skirts in our cubicles, expected to partake in the slow churn of capitalism as if we didn't see an undead ice dragon murder all our friends just last night.

While you work on physically unclenching and emotionally returning from the hellscape of Winterfell to the real-life hellscape of America, we're sure your head is swimming with questions about what exactly happened last night. Ours too, so let's remain in Westeros together just a little longer, shall we?

Couldn't Melisandre have done a bit more?

We aren't particularly clear on the intricacies of the red lady's relationship to the lord of light, or what exactly the lord of light's whole schtick is anyway (we do know he occasionally demands the murder of small, charming children), but it just seems like maybe the duo could have contributed more to the battle. Sure, Melisandre lit some curvy swords and pointy sticks on fire and said an annoyingly vague thing about blue eyes, but what about sending some fireballs raining down on the undead army? Or just setting the night king on fire?? Honestly, we would even have been satisfied with just a tad more visibility.

BRAN WE WOULD HAVE LOVED SOME UPDATES

Where are you, spooky boy? We know you're off enjoying the feeling of wind in your feathers but do you wanna share any of that newfound wisdom? Maybe even just let Theon know to dodge to the right a little?

Is my TV broken? Why can't I see anything?

Everyone knows Game of Thrones is dark, but most people thought that descriptor primarily applied to the content and themes, not the quality of the actual cinematography. But last night millions of Americans questioned the functionality of their TV screens as they screamed at friends and spouses, "PAUSE IT I'M GONNA TURN THE KITCHEN LIGHT OFF AND SEE IF THAT HELPS, TURN OUT THE LAMP!" Alas, even watching the show in total darkness did not help visibility, and we all continued to squint at our respective screens until the dragons burst above the clouds and we all winced as our pupils were flooded with unexpected moonlight.

DID NO ONE THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT CRYPTS ARE FULL OF DEAD PEOPLE?!?!

Listen, we know you had a lot of singing and drinking and fucking to do before the battle, but did it not cross ANYONE'S mind that the night king's whole thing is making dead bodies into bony murderers with dreamy blue eyes? At least their stupidity earned us that tender hand kiss between Sansa and Tyrion.

Do we kind of want a Sansa and Tyrion romance to happen?

I mean, did you see that tender hand kiss? Sure, he's probably in the later stages of syphilis and liver failure by now, but nobody's perfect and DID YOU SEE THAT TENDER HAND KISS? Sorry, I'll try to stop yelling.

Was Jon Snow riding the other dragon really the best move?

We get it, he wants Dany to call him Aegon in bed now, he rides dragons, WE GET IT. But isn't Jon's whole thing that he's really good at swords? Was he really helping by getting severe windburn on the back of a dragon that's realistically gonna do whatever it wants? Also, RUN A LITTLE FASTER AT THE NIGHT KING JON WHAT WAS WITH THAT LIGHT JOG?! LETS SEE SOME HUSTLE! Ugh.

Has Daenerys ever held a sword?

Sure, she's small, but if Arya has taught us anything its that size does not matter when it comes to kicking ass in Westeros. As he has since the days of desert wandering and Emilia Clarke agreeing to on-screen nudity, Jorah shows up to save the dragon queen's life, and in doing so, dies as he lived: deep in the friend zone.

Arya's dagger drop is the fan service we all deserved for sticking with this hell show for 8 seasons

Was Arya's appearance out of nowhere a moment of extreme deus ex machina? Absolutely. Was it debatably lazy and too easy? Absolutely. Was it the coolest damn thing we've ever seen? ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY.

Hopefully, by next week, we'll all have recovered enough to dive into the battle's afterm—

WAIT WHERE IS THE SECOND DRAGON IS HE OKAY? WAIT, HOLY SHIT, IS GHOST OKAY?! WHERE DID GHOST GO?

OH MY GOD IF WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH ANOTHER DRAGON DEATH OR ANOTHER DIRE WOLF DEATH I SWEAR TO GOD I AM OUT THIS TIME!!!! I REALLY MEAN IT I SWEAR I'LL STOP WATCHING THIS TIME I'LL DO IT!!!

NO I WILL NOT STOP YELLING.


Brooke Ivey Johnson is a Brooklyn based writer, playwright, and human woman. To read more of her work visit her blog or follow her twitter @BrookeIJohnson.



CULTURE

The Best Game of Thrones Season 8 Theories

Game of Thrones Season 8 is gonna be so cray, yo. #TeamWhiteWalkers

Game of Thrones Season 8 is coming this Sunday, so to celebrate, we're gathering up the best theories about what's going to happen.

Tyrion will kill Cersei

When Cersei was a little girl, she visited a fortune teller named Maggy the Frog who told her the prophecy of her future. This prophecy was shortened for the show, but in the book it goes:

"Three [children] for you. Gold shall be their crowns and gold their shrouds. And when your tears have drowned you, the valonqar shall wrap his hands about your pale white throat and choke the life from you."

The first part already came true, as Cersei had three children (Joffrey, Myrcella, and Tommen), all of whom died due to her political dealings. As for the second part, Cersei believes it refers to Tyrion. "Valonqar" means little brother in Valyrian, so it makes sense that Cersei would think her most hated brother would try to kill her. Some fans thought this was intentional tricky bait and Cersei would actually meet her end at Jaime's hands. Others thought it was more cryptic and she'll actually die during childbirth (possibly due to a child with dwarfism, just like Tyrion).

We submit Cersei was right in the first place. Tyrion will literally choke Cersei to death. Nice.

The Hound will meet his death in Cleganebowl

It's finally time for Cleganebowl 2019. Clegane v Clegane. The bout of the century.

We're talking about a fight that's been hyped up since Game of Thrones Season 1, just two beefy brothers fighting to the death. Here's the thing. The Hound is going to die. He needs to. There's nothing left for him to do as a character other than getting revenge on The Mountain for burning his face as a child. Sure, he could hook up with Brienne, but she's probably gonna hook up with Tormund instead because his face was never set on fire. So The Hound needs to die.

He's gonna kill The Mountain first though, no need to worry about that. But it's also going to be a pretty hollow victory because The Mountain is technically dead already and is living his life as a big, smelly zombie in a suit of armor.

Bran Stark is the Night King

A lot of people think Bran Stark might be the Night King. We don't, but it's a pretty interesting theory.

Basically, it boils down to Bran warging back in time to stop the Children of the Forest from creating the first White Walker. As Hodor's tragic story displayed, history in GOT cannot be changed, and those trying to do so will only end up fulfilling the events already set into motion. So if Bran tries to change history in a last-ditch effort to stop the White Walkers, it's possible that he might end up being the man turned into the original White Walker in the first place. That would mean the Night King is essentially Bran's future self, and that they can exist at the same time because current Bran has not returned to the past yet to become the Night King.

It makes sense when you think about it, but also seems a little far-fetched. That being said, it would make Bran a lot more interesting than he's ever been before, especially considering the fact that he spends most of his time baked out of his mind on "warg."

White Walkers Win

What if the White Walkers win? Wouldn't that be awesome? Think about it. We spend eight whole seasons building up to this massive battle between humans and monsters, eight seasons of "winter is coming." Now we're here, the last crescendo of fire and ice. All the politics, all the intrigue has lead to fractured humanity. How can they come together to defeat a foe much greater than themselves?

They can't. They fail. The White Walkers, unified beneath the unwavering banner of the Night King, demolish them. Humans can't work together, they're selfish and petty. The Night King, on the other hand, is a true leader. His subjects follow him without question. He has a zombie dragon now too. He's going to lay waste to everyone. Jon Snow? Zombie. Daenerys? Zombie. Cersei? Zombie. Ned Stark? Headless zombie now. Humanity deserves it. Ice wins. #TeamWhiteWalkers

Jon Snow will ride Ghost who will ride Rhaegal at the same time

People are "predicting" that Jon is going to ride Rhaegal the dragon into battle because "omg it's so perfect, Jon is actually a Targaryen and Rhaegal was his real dad so he'll be riding his legacy." Boring. We know.

But run with me here. What if Jon rides Ghost. And then Ghost mounts Rhaegal's head while Jon is riding him, so Jon is effectively riding a direwolf riding a dragon. Isn't that even more perfect? Isn't that even more "riding his legacy?" Because then, Jon is directly mounted on the symbol of his upbringing while being further supported by his true lineage. Jon riding Ghost riding Rhaegal is the best possible visual representation of Jon's history, blending every aspect of his past into an incredibly badass present.

Moreover, Rhaegal is a dragon, so obviously, he represents fire. And Ghost represents ice because he's a white direwolf from beyond the wall. So if Jon were to ride Ghost riding Rhaegal, it would be like he was riding fire and ice. And Game of Thrones is based off a series of books called A Song of Fire and Ice. Wow.


Dan Kahan is a writer & screenwriter from Brooklyn, usually rocking a man bun. Find more at dankahanwriter.com


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