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Watch the Epic Battle Between a Jeff Goldblum Look-Alike and a Gross Racist
Just imagine getting bodied by Jeff Golblum.
05.12.2020
@fallenleo
Picture this.
You're just a normal dude, hanging out with your shirt off and yelling racial slurs at a guy who looks kind of like Jurassic Park star Jeff Goldblum. All you want to do is be yourself—just a gross, racist, sexist, shirtless man living his best life—and then boom, you're all over the Internet because some guy who looks mildly like the star of The Fly f*cking bodied you.
<p>Sure, you were the one who started provoking him with racial slurs. And yes, you also threw the first punch. But can't a gross racist guy falling out of his own pants catch a break for once? </p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
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</p><p>Apparently not. <em>Apparently, </em>in <em>this society</em> it's totally <em>your fault </em>when you yell racial sh*t at someone and try to punch them, so they beat your ass. Even worse, people make fun of the fact that your fighting stance makes no sense whatsoever. So what if instead of putting your fists up in front of you like a normal person, you raise them over your head and spread your legs like you're cheering while you poo? It's not like you went to martial arts camp.</p><p></p><p>Furthermore, how could you have possibly known that the Jeff Goldblum-esque dude you were yelling racial slurs at <em>did</em>? Now, everyone is talking about how that guy's spin kick was fire, and how cool it was when he nailed you in the kidney. Well it wasn't cool to you. It hurt, and nobody seems to care because they just see you as a slobbering racist chud who can't even keep his pants on.</p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
<!-- End Ezoic - undersecond12 - under_second_paragraph --></p><p><em>Then</em>, to make matters worse, you went and grabbed a big stick to use as a weapon thinking that maybe it would give you the upper hand against Jeff Goldblum Guy in Round 2. But nope. Big, mean, *insert racism* Jeff Goldblum guy had to go and disarm you, taking your stick away, and your last shred of dignity along with it. And you better believe they caught that on video, too.</p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
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Music Lists
12 Black Indie Musicians to Support on Bandcamp Today
Bandcamp is waiving revenue shares today, and you should support POC artists.
06.05.2020
Today is another Bandcamp Friday, meaning until midnight tonight, the platform will be waiving revenue shares and letting artists take 100 percent of profits.
Now more than ever, as Black Lives Matter protests occur around the world, it's extremely important to lift marginalized voices. The music industry has repeatedly erased Black voices throughout history, despite the fact that most mainstream genres were invented by Black people.
<p>Today is a perfect excuse to treat yourself to some new music, better yet if that music is by Black artists. We've compiled a list of some of our favorite Black artists for you to peruse, no matter your favorite genre (note: some of these are bands that aren't entirely Black, but are fronted by a Black person).</p><p>Now, go forth and shop.</p>
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Christelle Bofale
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTIxNy9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MDg5ODA3Mn0.LN_gH1WEpaOigjtf-5jo36sV3cIx1XyLleJ2fIjNBwY/img.jpg?width=980" id="3dd5b" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="9bab7082468bcff0aa1a9e8874d3e74b" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" /><p>Taking inspiration from songwriter extraordinaires like Joni Mitchell and (Sandy) Alex G, Texan musician Christelle Bofale blends notes of jazz, dream-pop, folk, and her family's Congolese roots into a brand of indie rock that's entirely her own.</p>Proper.
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTMwOS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyNjIxMjg1M30.IN-CA7huV-IsLCmlXJN77OsdnP5MBEEGsIUvepE5uz4/img.jpg?width=980" id="f72f8" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="0561e54faa18997bddc322e393e3471c" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" /><p>It's no secret that the emo genre hasn't always been welcoming to folks who aren't white and straight. Brooklyn band Proper. are a refreshing change of pace, layering their vibrant guitar riffs with lyrics that are either tongue-in-cheek or stop you in your tracks. Take these exclamations from "New Years Resolutions": "If your feminism isn't intersectional, we don't want it / If only cisgendered black lives matter to you, we don't want it / If you're only an ally on a keyboard, we don't want it!"</p>Meet Me @ the Altar
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI4Mi9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyMzM2ODE2MH0.pWO2VzE07woxpx6VxAxktoLGC7pApLq5LcfpA2eZjJ0/img.jpg?width=980" id="02d19" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="79adafb30d663abc0a6d17e7b2617ac0" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Meet me @ the alter" /><p>Meet Me @ the Altar is a trio of women of color stretched between Florida, New Jersey, and Georgia. Their rapid kick drums and face-melting riffs are juxtaposed with Edith Johnson's crystal-clear vocals.</p>Teamonade
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI4NS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTU5NDI5MzM1OX0.T29ap27jEBvvzmPCfzStjx_q00mg5tLbds9rMJlYIzw/img.jpg?width=980" id="24a04" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="e45c7e196ba7bd93d4b2401a8b4fae46" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Teamonade" /><p>A trio based out of Ohio, Teamonade's upbeat, mathy indie rock is just as refreshing as an ice-cold Arnold Palmer. Their latest single "goin thru it" is a candid account of mental health issues that feels particularly heartwarming in the midst of "self care" trends. "I've never spent cash on a new pair of shoes," vocalist Osi Okoro sings. "Unless my mom told me that I had to look good for the Lord."</p>Mal Devisa
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI4Ni9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MDAyNDczNX0.VCFcwFgpn2FaV8xP9pvwDdcGuvGfWxmOSn7zfAB4K2g/img.jpg?width=980" id="c36dc" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="329fb47065aa6c42f9ba913bafbc4cb1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Mal Devisa" /><p>Deja Carr's first album as Mal Devisa was originally released in 2016, but the New England musician's haunting indie rock feels just as relevant four years later. With a quiet rage, Carr is defiant and assured, taking inspiration from the Black Lives Matter movement. "Does it kill you to know that we're all dying?" Carr sings on "Fire." "It kills me to know."</p>Alfred.
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI5Mi9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTU5NjUyNDM4OX0.2o5aerUDkWAeHSsHDfYDQwDGMza2ty1P3I67WbYM7iQ/img.jpg?width=980" id="753d4" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="d301d5be4280f752e6123e131b0aa405" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Alfred" /><p>Alfred. channels frustration into his unique breed of alternative hip-hop. The Virginia rapper's latest project <em>One Trick Pony </em>feels like self-expression in its truest form, building off of clever sample usage and a hypnotic flow.</p>Medhane
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI5NC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMjM4OTc2NX0.OClpOlWFkOuQounEjFinIrL0Gh2uiMw4IeIoe4Zj2wI/img.jpg?width=980" id="a004b" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="63f44d278caa4807bce7a25e479bb2e2" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Medhane" /><p>Over the past few months, Brooklyn rapper Medhane has gone from an underground favorite to one of music <a href="https://www.popdust.com/medhane-interview-full-circle-2645576544.html" target="_self">critics' favorite</a> rising voices in hip-hop. The languid, homespun feel of his new album <em>Cold Water </em>is sure to appeal to fans of alt-rap torchbearers like Earl Sweatshirt, while his profound lyrics and moody delivery would make Biggie proud.</p>Vagabon
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI5NS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyODE4MTk5NH0.M460CO_QaRFEfjEkmjE4Dl-uxq-QwkZZMI_0pkfL9dM/img.jpg?width=980" id="6ad8a" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="bac5ce4d57baa2c743bc0b9d58d1f67c" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Vagabon" /><p>Having gotten her start in Brooklyn's DIY scene, Lætitia Tamko—a.k.a. Vagabon—has become an inimitable, enigmatic force in indie music. While her 2017 debut <em>Infinite Worlds</em> was a delicately stunning collection of stripped-down rock, her self-titled album from last year expands into experimental synth-pop.</p>Ahomari.
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI5Ni9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0Njk5Mzk0Nn0.TTM0rW3uZmXu0c60_TE3JIjcfiSD6Av6NOfvV27tu9s/img.jpg?width=980" id="5f85f" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="616d35313a1df94e869d50eb0df3a0df" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Ahomari." /><p>South Carolinian artist Ahomari wavers between synth-pop, experimental electronica, and lo-fi beats in a sound that's entrancing and complex. They've said that they use music to cope with the stresses of being a queer Black person based in the South, and that sublime, escapist feeling in their music translates to listeners.</p>Debby Friday
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI5OC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxMDkzOTY1Mn0.QsmhnkuxWlu4xlXDmtLHgtDOsP4boF-8ORa4o73QznU/img.jpg?width=980" id="d1aa3" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f8b778d2805855b2a8abef33ecb41994" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Debby Friday" /><p>Vancouver-via-Nigeria producer/singer Debby Friday also uses music as a way of coping with everyday oppression. Taking cues from left-field industrial acts like Death Grips, Friday's music is dark, aggressive, and bone-chilling, culminating into a wash of catharsis.</p>Angelboy + the Halos
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTI5OS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MDI0NzQwM30.Y_eY_GRiXknDapXxtmcB1dR_Z7vJbT5VEqlQFkdOgFM/img.jpg?width=980" id="33760" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="7f7181fc99fc2707839e544647024254" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Angelboy+ the Halos" /><p>Angelboy + the Halos embody everything that is good in sunny, guitar-forward indie rock. Their bright sound feels youthful and fresh, reminiscent of your favorite albums of the 2000s.</p>Yves Tumor
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzM3NTMwMC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTU5Nzk5MDI0NH0.P7FYYHxWsZgR5Jk63BDFPO-FjKNKqOhZMv_AmKCVn60/img.jpg?width=980" id="db662" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="ab6c4e574086ee23f6dc7bf31a9d31b5" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Yves Tumor" /><p>Experimentalist Yves Tumor knows no bounds. Throughout their career, the Italian-based musician has shapeshifted between ambient noise and maximalist, orchestral pop; both sides of the spectrum are stunning. Yves Tumor's latest record, this year's <em>Heaven to a Tortured Mind, </em>saw them move towards a lustful, rock-leaning sound.</p>Related Articles Around the Web
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In February New Zealand writer-director-actor Taika Waititi was awarded an Oscar for the screenplay of his film Jojo Rabbit.
On May the 4th—the holiest of Star Wars holidays (Revenge of the 5th is sacrilege)—it was announced that he'd received what might be an even bigger honor: He's going to co-write and direct a new Star Wars movie.
<p>For disaffected fans of the series, this is great news. While recent <em>Star Wars</em> movies have featured plenty of stunning visuals, dramatic battles, and vague spiritual musing (as they should), the one department where they've been a bit lacking is fun...and competent storytelling. Okay, two departments. Fortunately, Taika Waititi is a master of both.</p><p>All the self-serious brooding in the world can't replace Yoda messing with Luke in the swamps of Dagobah, or the novelty of all those weirdos in the Mos Eisley cantina. Babu Frik can only get us so far. We need a filmmaker with a proven ability to bring an absurd sense of fun to an existing mega-franchise. Someone who can jump off a drab, brooding mess like <em>The Rise of Skywalker</em>—or, say, <em>Thor: The Dark World</em>—and deliver some silly good vibes... Boom. Taika Waititi.</p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
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<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzIxOTI1Mi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzOTA3MzI4MH0.8ocoi5yfCHplEO1PX5RiE3xvS4XJx7vj67Ab8OFlXTw/img.gif?width=980" id="86ac1" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="818bf95bb3684dd4d019ad227f149e2e" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Jojo Rabbit, f*** off, Hitler">
<small class="image-media media-caption" placeholder="Add Photo Caption...">Like this, but in reverse</small></p><p>Just look at the evidence. Have you seen <em>Thor: Ragnarok</em>? It's definitely one of the best Marvel movies—with lots of fun, over-the-top action—and it might be the only one that's truly funny. From Hulk and Thor bickering, to <a href="https://www.popdust.com/marvel-no-nut-november-2641216043.html" target="_self">Jeff Goldblum achieving peak Goldblum</a>, and Waititi himself voicing Korg—the goofy rock-man/would-be revolutionary—<em>Ragnarok</em> delivers genuine laughs. Or how about <em>Jojo Rabbit</em>, which managed to make Nazi Germany fun somehow, and featured Waititi as Jojo's imaginary friend Hitler, getting punted out a window—"F*** off, Hitler" indeed.<br></p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
<!-- End Ezoic - undersecond12 - under_second_paragraph --></p><p>On top of all that, Waititi has already done some of the work of making <em>Star Wars</em> fun again, directing the season finale of <em>The Mandalorian</em> and voicing reformed murder-droid IG-11. Now that he's proven himself, he's the perfect choice to take on a feature-length <em>Star Wars</em> story that can follow up the disappointment of <em>Episode IX</em>. If we're really lucky, maybe we'll even get a cameo from Waititi's frequent collaborator, Jemaine Clement, as some kind of freaky space man.</p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
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<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzIxOTI2NS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYwNjY4NjI3M30.gRfM48d8mRwoSaflAVwdUQ4x69bE1FoXIrQVbBlN1Bg/img.gif?width=980" id="a58fc" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="61ee2837df498f81f89f4b585f367c0d" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Jemaine Clement as freaky Bowie">
<small class="image-media media-caption" placeholder="Add Photo Caption...">It's the part he was born for</small></p><p>Whatever he makes of this opportunity, we can count on Taika Waititi to bring the weird fun of a space adventure back to the fore in <em>Star Wars</em>. The fact that he'll be working with screenwriter Krysty Wilson-Cairns—who was nominated for an Oscar for her work on <em>1917</em> and most recently collaborated with <a href="https://www.popdust.com/edgar-wrights-movies-ranked-2641357003.html" target="_self">writer-director Edgar Wright</a> on the upcoming horror film <em>Last Night in Soho</em>—only serves to make the whole prospect that much more exciting.<br></p><p><div id="ezoic-pub-ad-placeholder-632"></div>
<!-- End Ezoic - undersecond12 - under_second_paragraph --></p><h2></h2><p>Now we just need to get Bong Joon-Ho to make a class-conscious <em>Harry Potter</em> movie.</p>
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