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Kylie Jenner Thinks You Need Another Leather Jacket

Another Kar-Jenner Brand Emerges…But What Makes It Great?

When you think of the Kardashian fashion, your mind may wander to the color black. Seriously, whenever I throw on an all black fit, I say I feel like a Kardashian. When a family’s style makes you think of them when you wear a color, you could assume they’re pretty powerful in the fashion world.

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In between posting dance videos, chaotic lip syncs, and performing a social experiment on Ice Spice to completely replicate her, North West is certainly TikTok’s busiest nepo baby. At all hours of the day, you can find @kimandnorth alive on the app. Whether it be North forcing Kim Kardashian to do dances created by Charli D’Amelio or posting sped-up videos of Drunk Elephant products – it’s wild.

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Culture Feature

James Charles Can’t Erase His Predatory Behavior by “Holding Himself Accountable”

James Charles is no stranger to scandal, and he is finally addressing those grooming allegations by "holding [him]self accountable"

What is this, sir?

Question: When one of the most famous YouTube creators has become synonymous with grooming and sexual predation … then why is he still one of the platform's most successful creators?

When James Charles first hit YouTube, back when it was still a wealth of opportunity and creativity rather than a mob of identical content creators, he found success in the makeup community that eventually made him the first male CoverGirl ambassador in 2016 when he was just seventeen.

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Culture Feature

What to Do When Kylie Jenner Asks You for Money

Maybe when you've been on the cover of Forbes you lose your crowdfunding privileges?

American model Kylie Jenner wearing Balmain arrives at the 2022 Billboard Music Awards held at the MGM Grand Garden Arena on May 15, 2022 in Las Vegas, Nevada, United States.

Image Press Agency/NurPhoto/Shutterstock

When a young, single working mom reaches out for help, we all have a responsibility to dig deep and give what we can.

And if she's not even asking for herself but for a friend who's in need of some assistance, you know that it must be for an exceptionally good cause. But if you happen to be struggling at the time — maybe with the consequences of some sort of global health crisis that has brought on a major economic downturn — and don't happen to be the founder of your own billion-dollar cosmetics empire, what should you do when the 23-year-old cosmetics mogul and star of Keeping Up with the Kardashians asks you to pay for her makeup artist's medical bills?

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TV News

Who's to Blame in the Slapfight That Pushed Kourtney to Quit KUWTK?

In the season premiere of Keeping up With the Kardashians Kim's criticism of Kourtney finally pushed things too far

Diggzy/Shutterstock

These days it's hard to imagine anyone getting mad at another person for staying home sick.

The best reason to get mad at someone during the coronavirus pandemic is that they refuse to stay home. But that wasn't the case last September, when the Kardashian family's usual tension and in-fighting escalated to physical blows between Kourtney and Kim.

It was around the time Kylie Jenner was scheduled to have a major moment at the Balmain Spring 2020 fashion show in Paris. As the season premiere of Keeping Up With the Kardashians documents, Kylie was planning to represent Kylie Cosmetics at the event—and was in the process of planning out looks for the models—when she became violently ill. According to posts made to Twitter and Instagram, Kylie had a case of strep throat that was so bad she was bleeding from the mouth and had to be hospitalized, with Kylie later tweeting, "It was the sickest I've ever been."

But apparently Kim Kardashian West was not convinced of her half-sister's illness, and she was not concerned for the well-being of all the models and attendees that Kylie could have infected—we used to be so careless pre-2020! She felt strongly that she and Khloé were the only sisters who knew the value of hard work, and she let Kourtney know that she and Kylie were letting down the family, stating matter-of-factly, "You don't care about stuff" and, "If I were on my deathbed, I would still show up." Cool...

This is not the first time that Kim, 39, has directed this kind of criticism at her older sister—the infamous fight over the Christmas photo shoot was much the same—but it was apparently the last straw for Kourtney, 40, who interrupted Kim to say, "You act like I don't do sh*t … You have this narrative in your mind—" which is when Kim cut her off. Kourtney continued trying to mount a defense while Kim interjected with her criticism until Kourtney finally came out with, "I will literally f*ck you up" and quickly showed that it was not an empty threat.

The exchange of slaps, kicks, punches, and digging fingernails has to be seen to be fully appreciated—though footage of kangaroos fighting in the wild will get you 90% of the way there.

In the aftermath of the fight airing on national TV, Kourtney all but officially confirmed that she will not be returning to the show. It's always sad to see a family business falling apart over this kind of sibling drama—even if the family business was to constantly be on the brink of falling apart over sibling drama—but the question remains, whose fault was it?

Actually, never mind, it was Kim's. Without a doubt. Good for her that she's a hard worker—and she has actually done some impressive things in recent years—but her attitude that her siblings are supposed to live according to her standards, and that she knows better than they do about their own health, is insufferable—especially from a younger sister. Kourtney should not have flown off the handle, but Kim should have seen that she was striking a nerve and backed off rather than escalating it—and actually slapping her sister across the face with a lot more force than Kourtney managed.

Kangaroo Boxing Fight | Life Story | BBC Earthwww.youtube.com

In a series of tweets on the incident, Kourtney said, "It's trash #KUWTK." And when another user suggested that the fight had been the motivation she needed to finally leave the show—after previously deciding to cut way down on her involvement—Kourtney responded, "It is from our darker moments where growth happens." Grammar aside, it would be nice if she followed through this time and we no longer have to see this kind of drama without the soothing tones of David Attenborough's narration to reassure us that the kangaroos will be okay.

In a recent New Yorker article, Jia Tolentino addresses the phenomenon of the "Instagram face."

This social media-optimized visage, she writes, is a "single, cyborgian face. It's a young face, of course, with poreless skin and plump, high cheekbones. It has catlike eyes and long, cartoonish lashes; it has a small, neat nose and full, lush lips. It looks at you coyly but blankly, as if its owner has taken half a Klonopin and is considering asking you for a private-jet ride to Coachella."

If you've spent any time online, you probably know what Tolentino is talking about. "Instagram Face" is a term that refers to any of the artificially beautiful faces we see that could only exist online and thanks to a great deal of surgical enhancement. It's deeply linked to money, to plastic surgery, and to the utilization of light, texture, and power through image manipulation. It's inspired by Kylie Jenner and her brood. It's white but tanned, often freckled and always pouty-lipped. It is "as if the algorithmic tendency to flatten everything into a composite of greatest hits had resulted in a beauty ideal that favored white women capable of manufacturing a look of rootless exoticism," writes Tolentino. It is everything and nothing at the same time.

Handsome Squidward and Bella Hadid: Beauty as Pain

While thinking about these faces—shaped by highlighter and lip kits and edits and plastic surgery, blown-out and contoured and often captioned with Lizzo lyrics or quotes about either sadness or female empowerment or some combination of both—I began to realize that they reminded me of something.

Admittedly, they reminded me of a lot of things. Humans have always idealized unattainable beauty, and, in a way, the Instagram Face is like a modern iteration of ancient Greek sculpture. They symbolize humanity's aspiration to physical perfection, refracted through capitalism and technology—but they also resemble the iconic Handsome Squidward from the SpongeBob episode "The Two Faces of Squidward."

In the episode, Squidward gets hit with a door and after two weeks in the hospital, he finds himself converted to a Chad-type, complete with a very strong jawline. He is immediately photographed and thronged by groups of fans who attack and injure each other in an attempt to steal his clarinet and clothing. Unable to escape the rabid crowds, Squidward runs to the Krusty Krab and begs SpongeBob to change him back, so SpongeBob smashes him in the face with a door until he becomes...something surreal and bloated, something doomed and too beautiful for this Earth. He becomes Handsome Squidward.

As a crowd of onlookers gazes on in awe, Handsome Squidward dances across the screen. He moves like a drugged ballerina, bogged down by the weight of his beauty.

Handsome Squidward ~ The Short Versionwww.youtube.com

He bears a striking resemblance to Michael Phelps in stature and Bella Hadid in features. Perhaps it's no coincidence that Hadid is the first result that comes up on Google when you search "Instagram Face." Hadid, like Handsome Squidward, didn't always look like she does.

Instagram Face is a product of money—of plastic surgery, injection, or incision. Like Handsome Squidward, its beauty is artificial and painful and precarious.

Perhaps Handsome Squidward's defining characteristic is that he is always falling. He carries an air of doomed glory around him. His beauty is apocalyptic and self-annihilating. In the modern world of the Instagram Face, beauty is pain, collapse, falling, breakage. It's breaking one's face open and filling it with collagen and chemicals and projecting it through software in hopes that what blooms from the wreckage might garner attention, acceptance, adoration, and eventually, compensation.

The Instagram Face and Capitalism: Beauty as Collapse

When I see Instagram faces, digitally manipulated and paid for in order to sell, I experience a feeling of falling. Instagram faces are inherently doomed, as we all are, to age out of their beauty, to fall prey to the passage of time, to slip down and hit the earth. The bearers of Instagram faces, I assume, are forced to deal with the ugliness of the ordinary: the way faces peel and breathe and sweat and bleed, the way bodies contort and sag and excrete. For a brief moment, in the free-falling sphere of the online vortex, they are beautiful. For a moment, they are infinite, immortal, not-alive.

In that, they bear a resemblance to the most elusive and tantalizing aspects of capitalism, which—for all I criticize it—can look truly beautiful. That's part of its charm. Though, of course, we know that capitalism is killing people and killing the planet, brainwashing us into idealizing completely arbitrary traits, and always has been. Capitalism has motivated everything from colonization to trauma on the Internet, because it works. It is so difficult not to aspire to its promises and not to hoard the wealth and objects that one has. It is so difficult to extricate ourselves from it, even though we know it's killing the planet and so many people.

Still, the idea that we might be able to streamline and photoshop and buy ourselves into a life that feels like a Goop catalogue looks will never stop being tantalizing. No matter how much we preach self-love, our culture is still confused by a desire to transcend our human limitations even at the cost of our humanity. No matter how much we preach radicalism and liberation, we still live in a society built on competition. This sick mindset may be guiding us towards total climate collapse; but then again, have we ever not been falling?

Empowerment and Shifting Possibility: Beauty as Power

Of course, not everything about the Instagram Face is bad, or, at least, it's not implicitly worse than the beauty standards we've always glorified. The Face is becoming increasingly attainable to all genders. In a way, it does level the playing field, offering people the opportunity to change themselves on many levels. And it can offer confidence boosts. "On one hand, some people may find that conforming to a beauty standard can help with confidence and self-esteem," writes Julia Brucculieri for The Huffington Post. Still, even that self-esteem and confidence (like most of what gives us thrills within beauty-obsessed capitalism) teeters on thin ice. "That confidence boost, though, will likely be short-lived, especially if you become increasingly obsessed with presenting an altered version of yourself on social media."

There is, of course, the argument that we shouldn't criticize girls and women for posting selfies or for editing themselves, which makes a valid point. There is a tremendous amount of sexism inherent in a lot of criticism of women owning and celebrating their beauty, sexuality, and flesh prisons.

Still, when I see these faces I can't help but feel like capitalism has devoured female empowerment, regurgitating it just like it's capitalizing on social justice without really changing anything while whiteness has remained in power; it's just morphed. The modern era was supposed to be post-feminist, a time of body positivity and liberation. When did it become about mutilating ourselves, about endlessly deifying "glow-ups"? Has the human algorithm always leaned towards competition, and will we ever successfully hack it?

Are the Kardashians' billions a sufficient balm for knowing that their fans are harming themselves and ingesting toxic diet products in order to achieve a look similar to theirs? Most likely.

But when I scroll through Instagram, I still can't help but feel like those fish watching Squidward fall through the glass. I can't look away from this dazzling, collapsing world.