The only thing more American than apple pie is a nip slip.

Or in this case, bottom slips. On August 29th, Farrah Abraham of Teen Mom fame accidentally showed more skin than planned on the red carpet for the screening of Ad Astra. Her floral-print ball gown by French designer Christophe Guillarme featured a thigh-high slit that made it clear Abraham had opted to attend the premiere sans undergarments. You might think that in this age of sexual freedom, skimpy outfits, photo leaks, and body positivity, we'd be past making a big deal out of something as run of the mill as a skirt revealing more than intended. But the incident immediately made headlines, overshadowing the premiere and causing a stir on social media. She later posted a picture on Instagram.

Interestingly, the reality star had a similar "accident" at last year's Cannes Film Festival, and video later showed that the crotch-shot was intentional. Commenters on Abraham's Venice Instagram were not going to let her forget it.

One person wrote: "So you had to flash your vag just like you did at the Cannes? Pretty sad that's how you choose to keep your name in the tabloids. At each event you were clearly pulling your dress to flash everyone your vag." Another said, "Farrah 101 for when you're an irreverent wannabe...of course we flash our cooter...oooops I mean 'wardrobe malfunction'...you've got to be one of the most desperate people I've ever seen...and all in the presence of poor Sophia...such a roll model."

If the "malfunction" was in fact intentional, one has to admit that if the goal was free publicity, it was a savvy move. If you Google "celebrity wardrobe malfunction," 32,100,000 results appear immediately. Admit it, you can't name who won the 2004 super bowl, you probably can't even say for sure which teams played, but you absolutely remember the exact instant during the half time show when Janet Jackson showed America more than her killer dance moves.

The iconic wardrobe malfunction made headlines everywhere, throwing the game into the background. Or maybe you remember when Chrissy Teigen didn't account for the breeze and accidentally showed off her immaculately waxed undercarriage. Or the famous instance of Britney Spears exiting a car without any underwear on. So why are people vilifying Abraham for merely giving the people what they want?

Why do we care so much about glimpses of usually covered human anatomy? Why do we find nip slips and accidental cr*tch shots more titillating than images of bare bodies that are readily available online or even in movies? What is the undeniable appeal of an outfit going rogue?

The truth is that we love seeing someone's body without their explicit consent.

People are so riled up about Abraham's manufactured malfunction because knowing it was intentional takes away much of the appeal. And that's pretty f*cked up.

As we take baby steps towards becoming a society that prioritizes consent, we have to realize that reveling in wardrobe malfunctions can't be a part of that better future. The human body isn't inherently sexual or scandalous, and it's never okay to look at someone's naked body if they don't mean to show it to you. It's 2019: Aren't we a different society than we were when n*pple gate shook our worlds? Isn't it time to stop treating the human body like a spectacle? Maybe, instead of shaming Farrah Abraham for merely capitalizing on an American perversion, we should take a look inwards and think about why we're still so fascinated by wardrobe malfunctions—and what exactly that says about us.

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This Argentinian News Reporter Wardrobe Malfunction is Insane

Headline news...

Argentinian news reporter wardrobe malfunction insanely bizarre—like, totally fucking bizarre—like, how on Earth does this happen?!!

An Argentinian news reporter suffered a wardrobe malfunction that's bizarre, to say the least.

It's so bizarre it almost looks like it's intentional.

Like, maybe Alina Moine had splashed out on some expensive new undies and just had to show them off to the world.

And, it all happened on glorious live TV.

The TV host was presenting a segment on the Olympic games in Brazil when her mega-malfunction occurred.

Somehow, mid-sentence she managed to lift her floaty black mini dress right up flashing-off her undies.

It appears she managed to get her hand caught on the hem—and, yeah, flasher time.

I see Paris... I see France...

The flash occurred for an excruciating ten seconds or so before normal dress service resumed.

Got to give Moine props though for just not giving a fuck.

Girlfriend's like the honey badger, and handled it like a pro.

Thankfully, Argentina's a little more laid back than the good old U.S. of A.

So, there's been no-one out there getting their panties in a twist over Panty-gate.

Unlike that now infamous Super Bowl performance back in 2004.

Remember that?

Of course you do!

Because, oh shit son! Nipple!

Janet Jackson's “accidental" nipple flash was treated by the outraged public like it was the end of the world as we know it.

Funnily enough though, the sun kept setting, and the moon kept rising.

And, Armageddon never occurred.

That said, never fear, there's still time folks.

Scroll down to watch the Argentinian news reporter wardrobe malfunction

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Camel Toe Prevention Is Out There Ladies!



Celebrity moose knuckle;

Camel toe isn't an affliction only suffered by the ladies.

Men get it too, although it's rather amusingly called moose knuckle.

Now whilst men seem to find a woman's camel toe attractive (just do a search on Craigslist and you'll see...) I'm not sure the feeling towards moose knuckle is reciprocated.

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Amal Clooney capped off months of fashion grandstanding with a magnificent wardrobe malfunction at the premiere of her husband's movie in Cannes.

Resplendent in a pale yellow silk chiffon gown by Atelier Versace, Amal was determined to upstage her husband George Clooney's costar, Julia Roberts, and director Jodie Foster.

Unfortunately, the gown was too much for Amal to handle.

The long train presented a challenge to the fashion-conscious human rights lawyer, who fussed with it so much that a film festival official has to carry it for her.

But that was a minor snafu compared to the gown's daring thigh-high slit!

Poor George maintained a frozen grin as his wife came perilously close to revealing all to the assembled throng of fans, film-stars and photographers.

Julie Roberts seemed amused as Amal struggled with the dress, throwing a look of 'Serves you right, you idiot" over George's head.

Why didn't someone at Atelier Versace instruct Amal on how to wear the dress? Were they punking the glamorous Mrs. Clooney or did they assume her legal training would prepare her for the ordeal of walking the red carpet?

Where was Donatella? Is she just jealous that Amal is moving in on her territory of malnourished toothpick-like thinness?

You know what, who cares.

The important thing is that Amal helped George to stop worrying about the audience response to Money Monster, by distracting him with her wardrobe malfunction.

Those who have cruelly speculated about Mrs.Clooney's gender were so close to solving the mystery that you can almost hear the collective groan of disappointment.

So close and yet...

Never mind.

It was a wonderful event for Amal-watchers, who will be interested to know that Charlotte Tilbury was responsible for Mrs. Clooney's heavy make up, and Rod Ortega styled her ravishing hair (i.e., extensions.)

Bravissimo, Amal! You have outdone yourself and we thank you.

mexican weather girl camel toe

Oh the shame of it!

A poor Mexican weather girl has gone viral after an unfortunate wardrobe malfunction live on air.

Susana Almeida was giving an enthusiastic rundown of the weather in Mexico for 4 Televisa Guadalajara, when switched on viewers spotted an enormous camel toe making an unexpected appearance.

The clip has been viewed over 40,000 times on Imgur since the segment aired and has led to Almeida being dubbed " The World's Hottest Weather Presenter".

Social media users have been vocal in their admiration of both her labia and her curves, with one observer stating;

"Those curves are dangerous. It is a good thing I like danger! Dayyyummmm, them curves!"

Whilst another was moved to burst into song;

“I see a little camel of a toe, Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango?"

mexican weather girl camel toe

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Let's face it girls, we all want big, full lips.

But what if genetics short-changed you in that department and all you got is exacto-knife crotch. Yeah, crotch. What did you think I meant? Your other lips? That is so 2000-late.

Well, fear not thin-lipped ladies, now Japan has created a product tailor-made to stave off all your lacking labial insecurities!

Clearly there was a demand...

They're called, “Party Pants," of course, and they feature a manufactured version of the camel toe you've always dreamed of.

You know, one's like the cool cheerleader Tiffany had, and how you couldn't help but eye her gleaming gusset as she changed in the locker room before gym class.

Like a good bra, the Party Pants appears to "lift and separate".

Thank you, Japan! We all know how embarrassing it can be to have a mushy, blurred line of camel cleavage, am I right ladies? No? Yeah, no. Not so much.

They come in assorted styles and colors. The skimpier option even come with a little curtain that you can wear if you want to hide the toe and then flash it when the urge should strike.

Too small or too big?

And for those with more generously endowed counter parts…

Feeling a little long in the labia? Short shorts, bikini bottoms, and even yoga pants put you at risk of giving a free camel toe show. Well not any more, ladies. Thanks to Japan, there are products to prevent camel toe like a company called Cuchini, who's slogan is,

“Our lips are sealed."

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