This Haunts Me
TV Features

This Haunts Me: Mariah Carey Taking a Bath on MTV's "Cribs"

It was 2002, and Mariah Carey wanted a bath. Now we'll never be clean.

Mariah Carey

Photo by Evan Agostini-Invision-AP-Shutterstock

Before TikTok, before Snapchat, and before YouTube, there was MTV in the early aughts: a lawless land of velour tracksuits and diamond grillz, tiny dogs and spray tans.

And then there was Mariah Carey, who had barely survived 2001 after channeling her lifeforce into the beloved film disaster Glitter, along with the critically panned soundtrack of the same name. And yet, Carey persisted–and took a bath in front of millions of viewers on MTV's Cribs.

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Culture Feature

This Haunts Me: "My Immortal" May Be One of the Greatest Works of Postmodern Art

Was "My Immortal" a genuine work of terrible fanfiction, or was it a big ironic joke all along?

For fiction enthusiasts in the early 2000s, Fanfiction.net was the place to be.

In 1998, Fanfiction.net launched as a hub for fanfiction stories. The Internet was still in its Golden Age of lawlessness and creativity, with decentralized fan communities spread across personal websites and niche forums. Each brimmed with their own politics and drama, and for fans of children's novels, especially Harry Potter, fanfiction was serious business.

Battle lines were drawn over which Harry Potter characters you shipped (in explicit detail, usually). Fanfiction with the correct ships would be lauded as the greatest thing since real Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans, and bad ships would be derided as blasphemy. Dissent could mean being banned forever from the biggest online communities for your favorite series.

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Culture Feature

This Haunts Me: Miley Cyrus's Twerking Phase

It was the cultural appropriation olympics and Miley was getting all the gold.

Miley Cyrus

By Kobby Dagan // Shutterstock

Imagine if, in the year of our Lord 2021, a white woman claimed to invent twerking.

She would be so swiftly canceled that there wouldn't be a discussion. You'd log into twitter in an attempt to get in on the action and your timeline would be a mess of memes, carnage, and the occasional #woke thread straight out of Race Theory: 101.

In 2021, some people might defend whichever celebrity was trending in an #overparty hashtag, but the majority of the internet would guilt said white woman into making a teary apology on Instagram live.

However, this was not the case in 2013 when Miley Cyrus woke up and chose violence.

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Culture Feature

This Haunts Me: Taylor Swift in That Suitcase

Taylor Swift being carried around in a suitcase in 2017 was the cultural reset.

The face of a woman who has known the inside of a suitcase

Evan Agostini/Invision/AP/Shutterstock

Who would have thought that when Taylor Swift's "You Belong With Me" video was announced as the winner of the 2009 Video Music Award for Video of the Year, it would end like this: Taylor being carried out of her apartment inside a suitcase?

That fateful moment in 2009 was the first domino to fall in a series of events that now haunt me, but none more than the idea of Swift concocting the idea of crawling into a suitcase to avoid being seen by the paparazzi, then being carried out into the trunk of her car.

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Culture Feature

This Haunts Me: Murderous Cartoon Animals of the 2000s

Web shows like "Happy Tree Friends" and "Llamas With Hats" emblemize a disturbing trend that I can't shake from my memory.

Fall Out Boy - The Carpal Tunnel Of Love

Last week, a friend of mine brought to our group chat a question that'd leave my brain spinning with nostalgia for the rest of the day: "What's everyone's favorite terrible viral video from the 2000s?"

We immediately covered the basics: Original songs like "Shoes" and "Chocolate Rain," the purely insane (but still sort of relevant?) "Leave Britney Alone," the insta-party trick "Daft Hands," and Weezer's "Pork and Beans" music video that managed to convene all the aforementioned videos into one nifty time capsule. Soon, we were discussing the deep cuts of mid-2000s YouTube virality, including the equally adorable and disturbing animated web series "Happy Tree Friends."

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Culture Feature

​​This Haunts Me: The Shredded Cheese Wife Guy

One Texas couple became a meme after they went 18 minutes without shredded cheese on their fajitas. What could be worse?

Courtesy of Junkee

Karens. Even if you don't know them by name, you know who they are.

Karens have been asking to speak to managers all over American suburbia ever since Kate Gosselin debuted her infamous reverse-mullet on Jon and Kate Plus 8 in 2007. "Karens"—the collective nickname for middle-aged entitled white women who love nothing more than being pains in your ass—have been walking among us for quite some time, but as shelter-in-place orders and mask mandates have taken over the world, the presence of Karens has become even more apparent.

Last weekend, a Karen went viral in a since-deleted Tweet for a reason only Karens would empathize with. Jason Vicknair, a 40-year-old man from Allen, Texas, was just trying to enjoy his first date night out in three months with his wife at a Tex-Mex restaurant called Mi Cocina. Things took a turn for the worse.

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