CULTURE

This Week in Internet Hell: "Game of Thrones" Is Sexist and YouTube Gets Emotionally Violent

What's a "ProJared" and why should we care? Society has proven once more that we love sticking our noses into strangers' emotional conflicts and watching their personal lives burn.

VectorStock

But on to the really important news this week: Society has proven once more that we love sticking our noses into strangers' emotional conflicts and watching their personal lives burn. It's not that we love or condone emotional violence—we're just terrible people who are glad not to be one of the following individuals.

1. No One Knew What "Camp" Meant at the Met Gala—but Neither Do We?

All we learned from this year's exclusive event is that its theme of camp isn't gender-bending fashion, Zendaya in a Cinderella dress, or Lady Gaga removing layers like she's melting from all the attention. It might be Lena Waithe's historic jacket, though.

AsiaTatler

2. Game of Thrones Doesn't Know How a Woman Thinks or Speaks or Acts or Survives

With its final season winding down, Game of Thrones seems to believe that women can't be strong without men and that people can suddenly see in the dark. With female characters showing poor development, weepy dependence on others for validation, and given deeply problematic lines, it's almost like the show...maybe...just isn't that good or worth the hype in the first place? Sorry, never mind me: I'm a "Never Seen an Episode and Don't Care" type of viewer, according to our writer's Dan Kahan's Game of Thrones quiz, "What Type of Viewer Are You?"

popdust internet hell Brienne ugly-crying like the amazing, strong, beautiful woman that she isMetro

But on to the important questions: Was that or was that NOT a damn Starbucks cup in front of Dany?!

popdust game of thrones starbucks cup What was news like before "Game of Thrones"?USA Today

3. YouTube Gamers ProJared and JonTron Trended on Twitter

This man is an online "celebrity." Gaming YouTuber ProJared is apparently divorcing his wife, who, among other things, accused him of soliciting nude photos from his underage fans. Once again, this man earns his living by owning a YouTube account.

Twitter

4. Honor the release of It: Chapter Two's trailer by buying your very own Pennywise!

We loved Stephen King's classic novel It, we enjoyed the film adaptation, and we maybe peed ourselves a little when the trailer for the sequel premiered this week. So in the vein of evil clown fandom, please consider purchasing this eBay seller's "Haunted 20 inch tall CLOWN Doll spirit Vessel. Supernatural Paranormal power."

Meet Ollie, "a spiritual hobo clown vessel that is 20 inches tall. Sometimes late at night you will hear talking in his room. We have seen Shadow figures all around him. Ollie the hobo like's to play with the car keys, like hiding them at times and putting them right back where you first looked for them, he is a joker. He also likes to play with the lights and TV remote, Radio and much more. I got his name from my spirit box voice recorder and confirmed it on my Ouija Board as Ollie."

User: terris145 /eBay Everything Else>Metaphysical>Psychic, Paranormal

User: terris145 /eBay Everything Else>Metaphysical>Psychic, Paranormal

5. Please Let This "Nice Man" Drive Your Car to Florida

Here at Popdust Internet Hell we usually feature one of Florida's gloriously dumb criminals, from posing as a police officer to pull over an actual police officer to smearing your own feces all over a public picnic table. But this week, we just want to spotlight this lovely Craigslist user who wants the best for you and your car and is maybe also fleeing the state: "➡ Nice Man Will Drive Your Car To South Florida"➡ Nice Man Will Drive Your Car To South Florida." Good luck, Michael!

Craigslist



Meg Hanson is a Brooklyn-based writer, teacher, and jaywalker. Find Meg at her website and on Twitter @megsoyung.


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CULTURE

This Week in Internet Hell: A Bear, a Bunny, and a Bird (Also, Thanos)

The Easter Bunny is a criminal, and there’s still no joy in Idaho.

Venus via WeHeartI

Happy belated Easter! Did you hear that the Easter Bunny was arrested in Florida? Or that you can now stay in a giant potato in Idaho, because how else would you experience joy in Idaho? Also, Thanos is back. Welcome to this week in Internet Hell.

1. Thanos Is Google. Google is Thanos.

The release of Avengers: Endgame may have flooded Twitter with spoilers and broken box office records, but mostly it's real. I mean Thanos is real. Sure, Google is working a cool, kitschy marketing ploy here, but also it's a warning. Guys, he's coming.

2. 11% of the World's Population Lives on $2/DayBut Others Pay $200/Night to Sleep in a Potato Airbnb

With “hash browns for cushions, fries as shelves, and a giant bowl of fluffy mash to snuggle into at night," the cost of spending one night in the Big Idaho Potato Hotel is the same as sponsoring a child's education for six months. Also, where are the windows? How is this safe?

Popdust internet hell This Is Insider


This Is Insider


3. Killer Pets Deserve Homes, Too

Some pets murder their owners and are put to death. But, like humans, if you are too pretty to die, then you can murder whomever you'd like and probably get away with it.

4. The Easter Bunny Got Arrested—in Florida

Antoine McDonald dressed up as the Easter Bunny “for laughs," but then he saw a man in a parking lot spit at a woman, so he intervened. The unidentified man became aggressive, and so McDonald, who told WKMG that he's the type of person "to avoid fights," began punching the man until police arrived. He did it all in a bunny costume, guys—somewhere in Florida, a man has bruises from the Easter Bunny.

5. Anti-Vaccers Held a Rally and They Used a Grizzly Bear to Prove Their Point

Yes. This (sort of) occurred this past week. Gizmodo published, “This Was Supposed to Be a Story About a Bizarre Anti-Vaccine Rally and a Sedated Bear. Then It Got Weird." It got weird after you heard about the bear? How? When? Why? And how bloody were the inevitable injuries that ensued? I won't spoil it for you. Here is an excerpt of the organizers' proposed plans for the rally:

Gizmodo



Meg Hanson is a Brooklyn-based writer, teacher, and jaywalker. Find Meg at her website and on Twitter @megsoyung.


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CULTURE

This Week in Internet Hell: Clueless Men Pretend to Be in Charge and Jason Momoa Might Kill Us All

Aquaman's clean-shaven face could murder us all with its unbearable beauty before climate change does by 2050.

Screen Rant

The Mueller Report is out. AQUAMAN SHAVED HIS BEARD. Please adopt this adorable succubus. AQUAMAN SHAVED HIS BEARD. Not all Florida cops are real. AQUAMAN SHAVED HIS BEARD.

1. Clueless Man Pretends to Be in Charge

Matthew Joseph Erris, from Pasco County, Florida, just wanted to be a police officer. Maybe he'd been dreaming of it since he was a little boy. Maybe that's why he put a police light bar on top of his Chevy Trailblazer, along with red and blue lights on its grill. Maybe that's why he flashed his fake police lights on Tuesday night and signaled the car in front of him to pull over; maybe he just believed in himself.

Unfortunately, as WFLA reported, he pulled over a real police officer, who was undercover when Erris stopped him. After reporting Erris and searching his car, the cop found found a "realistic looking" airsoft pistol in a holster. Impersonating an officer can result in up to five years in jail, but while Erris waits for his sentencing, at least he got to live his dream for a day.

"FLORIDA MAN PRETENDS TO BE A COP, PULLS OVER ACTUAL COP, GETS ARRESTED"

popdust internet hell florida man Newsweek

2. (A Different) Clueless Man Pretends to Be in Charge

If you want to understand the true, investigative essence of Robert Mueller's report on Donald Trump's alleged collusion, obstructions of justice, and most vicious firings on The Apprentice, turn to the art form of the meme. Twitter has graciously translated the most salient points of the 400-page report, which is mostly comprised of color-coded redactions. But that's fine; memes already proved we're living in a post-word society. The truth lies between the lines:

3. Jason Momoa's Jawline Can Save the Planet

Prior to this week, the Aquaman actor hadn't shaved since 2012. He finally unleashed the divine light that is his bare face in order to "bring awareness" to the environmental damage caused by plastic bottles and promote a new line of "infinitely recyclable" aluminum cans. It's pro-active and honorable, but since he's even more handsome now, he could murder us all with his looks long before climate change does by 2050.

4. Craigslist Missed Connections

Throughout the politically-charged week, everyone was craving a little love. As for SJ (a.k.a. "boot girl"), she's just "Searching for: Boot Boy," and she's not letting a little limp slow her down. Also, have you Googled "twin flames" lately? It's a stupid idea; we believe it whole-heartedly.

Craigslist

5. eBay Has a Succubus for Sale

For only $49.99, you can purchase this "HAUNTED RING: SEXUAL SUCCUBUS! DOMINATE YOUR PERSONAL DEMON LOVER! INTENSE! " from the trusted seller mysticmagicks. With 98.9% positive feedback, Laci is a proud mother, wife, and practitioner of "the art of Magick." More importantly, she uses her powers for good, using eBay to "re-home" many of her "spirit children," which are "very dear" to her. Be careful with this ring, however, for it holds great orgasmic power.

eBay

eBay

internet hell ebay haunted ring succubus eBay


Meg Hanson is a Brooklyn-based writer, teacher, and jaywalker. Find Meg at her website and on Twitter @megsoyung.


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CULTURE

This Week in Internet Hell: YouTube Sends a Man to Jail and Donald Trump Daydreams about Joe Biden

Sadly, none of these are April Fools' pranks, just human nature trolling our faith in humanity.

Aliexpress

The first rule of the Internet is don't break the law. The second rule of the Internet is don't live stream yourself when you break the law.

The final rules are: deny all video evidence you take of yourself and always get the contact information of the "friend" who comes to your house just to dress up for you. Welcome to April's first week of Internet hell.

1. Mississippi YouTuber filmed himself speeding more than 180 mph.

Beau Alan Rogel is a 36-year-old "self-proclaimed YouTube celebrity" who live-streamed his shitty footage of breaking the speed limit. At 3:25, he's pulled over by three police officers, who ask him why he was ridiculously speeding. Rogel answers, "I haven't been driving fast." Rogel explains why he's filming, "I get paid to be on YouTube. I video every day of my life. I video when I take a s**t, too."

Rogel, who was later found to have several felony convictions, has been charged with reckless driving and possession of a firearm by a convicted felon. He was released on a $20,000 bond—and all for his 11,000 YouTube subscribers.

Youtube Troll calls COPS while on Live Feed in Shelby GT350 at 180+ mph! youtu.be

2. Donald Trump thinks about Joe Biden touching himself.

The Donald tweeted a parody of Biden's apology for invading female coworkers' personal space. In reply, Biden tweeted, "I see that you are on the job and presidential, as always."

3. Craiglist's Missed Connections continues to make fairy tales come true.

Passionate romance! Lost loves! Searching for the phantom cross-dresser of your dreams! It's a Disney movie come true.

Craigslist

Urban Dictionary

4. eBay's Vintage Toy collection includes mint-condition problematic action figures.

This VINTAGE FIGHTING EAGLE MARX BEST OF THE WEST action figure could be yours for the low, low price of $60!

eBay

5. r/NoStupidQuestions: "Do animals like the food they eat?"

Everyone knows Reddit is a haven for sophisticated, avant-garde thinkers who go under-appreciated by the drooling masses—but there's even a space for those insecure in their brilliance. This poster in r/nostupidquestions dares to query the ontological differences between man and beast:

"Like yknow, butterflies drink nectar. Is it tasty and refreshing?

Cows and other animals eat grass, I have tasted grass and it's not that spectacular. Do cows enjoy the flavor?

Do carnivores actually enjoy the weird raw texture and taste of guts and blood and tendons? Obviously theres evolutionary hard wiring to eat meat but...is it yummy to them?

It got me thinking because yeah my dog eats his food happily but if you leave a burger and fries on the floor and let him pick, his food bowl will remain full of kibble. So theres preference and enjoyment there, right?

I cant imagine taste is just a human thing...I bet theres a cow out there that thinks grass is some bullshit"

Reddit


Meg Hanson is a Brooklyn-based writer, teacher, and jaywalker. Find Meg at her website and on Twitter @megsoyung.


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CULTURE

This Week in Internet Hell: The "Wokest" News Channel and More Human Feces

A tiny horse, a black dress, and Batman enter your search bar.

VectorStock

Are you under-employed and under-Woke™?

Are you eager to discuss pop culture like Space Ghost and The Outer Limits? Do you say "fuck it" and shit in the park instead of waiting for public restrooms? Then congratulations, you've had a great week on the Internet. Excuse the rest of us while we bounce between enjoying the early spring and feeling like an asshole.

1. Important Quiz about Toledo's Finest News Channel

This could be:

A) Performance art

B) Definitive proof that American exceptionalism is a myth

C) A Chinese psy-op designed to make American youths contemplate suicide

2. The Crime and Punishment of Being Online

One of this week's shining Twitter Moments updated us on Anna Sorokin, the 28-year-old Soho Grifter who conned her way into New York's social elite by posing as a German heiress. Her lawyer, Todd Spodek, confirmed to GQ this week that he'd hired celebrity stylist Anastasia Walker (known for her work with Courtney Love and G-Eazy) as a "courtroom stylist."

Spodek justified the decision with complete seriousness: "It is imperative that Anna dress appropriately for the trial. Anna's style was a driving force in her business and life, and it is a part of who she is. I want the jury to see that side of her and enlisted a stylist to assist in slecting [sic] the appropriate outfits for trial. However the logistics of dropping off trial outfits at Rikers Island doest [sic] not work in our favor. Thanks."

Anna Sorokin, aka the Soho Grifter, is using a courtroom stylist, GQ reports twitter.com

3. Arnold Schwarzenegger on Instagram

This is a video of Arnold Schwarzenegger chasing a small, thick horse on a small, thick bicycle. He used Tik Tok to make "Should Have Been a Cowboy" the backing track to this inexplicable footage. At the end of the video, Arnie gives the lil' steed a bite of a carrot. Climate change will be irreversible in 11 years.

4. Craigslist Is for (Somewhat Skilled) Writers

Firstly, all the best job ads are posted on Craigslist. Second, all the best Los Angeles job ads are posted on Craigslist: New York. Third, only the most competitive job ads offer "no pay" as compensation for "some" skill.

Craigslist - Manhattan - Gigs - Writing Gigs

"Do you love all things pop culture plus have some writing skill?

We are looking for people who want to take part in the launch of our new content platform. We're a bit like a gamified YouTube that offers videos and blogs.

Our difference is creators can charge micropayments for their content and viewers get automatically rewarded.

We are looking for writers to do:
Best of
Worst of
Show Recaps
Comic/Film/Series/Music analysis and more

We're open to letting you write what your passionate about!

During our beta testing you will receive your name in the byline of the article but no pay.

After beta you'll be able to earn money in two ways:
1. We hire you to keep writing for us
2. You charge micropayments for your articles ($.01 - $.05) and keep 100% of the profit

This is great for people who love to write and want to built an audience on a new platform.

We are based in Los Angeles but you can write from anywhere! If interested please send a little bit about yourself and a writing example that is pop culture based.

Thanks!"

5. Predating the Infamous Florida Man, Beware the Florida Woman

In the case of a "Florida Woman Accused of Spreading Human Feces on Picnic Tables, Grills Before Child's Birthday Party," the Sarasota County Sheriff's Office arrested Heather Carpenter, 41, on charges that she "spread human fecal matter on picnic tables and grills at a local park ahead of a child's birthday party. The act was reportedly in retaliation for a professional dispute at the school where Carpenter worked as a substitute teacher."

Newsweek


Meg Hanson is a Brooklyn-based writer, teacher, and jaywalker. Find Meg at her website and on Twitter @megsoyung.


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CULTURE

This Week in Internet Hell: No Cats or Teenagers Were Hurt During the Making of This List

What do Shane Dawson, Wolf Blitzer, and egg rolls have in common? They each ruined our week.

123rf.com

March Madness is the Internet's favorite time of year if you don't count April Fool's, the Super Bowl, and any time after midnight.

This week, we've been shocked to find that YouTubers might be desperate for attention, criminals also love greasy takeout, and Wolf Blitzer wants to be a teen idol. Here are five bright, horrible moments from the Internet this week.

1. This Is Probably NOT Human Slavery on eBay...but also Is It?!

No, no—this creative teen is probably poking fun at Internet job postings, or eBay, or rampant consumerism that commodifies every aspect of human experience. Right?! Her entire listing for "Hailey J. Eilert - Varsity Appllication [sic]" reads: "I am a hardworking individual who is ready to start working! I love the unique style of the company and feel I would be a good fit as I am a fast learner and team player. As a sophomore, I have a very flexible schedule and a car so I can easily adapt to a busy work schedule. For privacy concerns, I attached another document to my original email providing more detailed information about my references and employers as well as my school schedule. Thank You!"

Ebay - haileeiler-0

2. YouTuber Shane Dawson Probably Fucked His Cat

3. Florida Man Arrested, Accused of Shoving Woman to Get Egg Rolls

This is a story about a man who got arrested after trying to shove his way into a woman's house to access egg rolls. I like it because the dude just really wanted some egg rolls. That's pretty wholesome. Obviously, this was in Florida.

Yeah, he looks like he just had egg rolls.Klew TV

4. Reality Is the Best Prank Ever

Is this real or a dream or a gift?

5. Remember Craigslist: Missed Connections?

Guys, this gentle soul even included a map. Send help!

Craigslist - New York - Missed Connections


Meg Hanson is a Brooklyn-based writer, teacher, and jaywalker. Find Meg at her website and on Twitter @megsoyung.


POP⚡DUST | Read More...

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